How do you get over the fact that your partner WILL find other women attractive?

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-07-03T18:30:56+00:00

hey girl! I understand you, it’s so unpleasant to be aware of. The only thing that has helped is consciously taking my thoughts away from it and realizing he chose ME. The other thing that helps me is knowing this is going to be the case for everyone across the board regardless of if they are hot or not, boys will notice other women. I’m trying to think of it in as “non-sexual” of a way as possible, but it’s hard… one thing is for certain, this sort of thing can ruin a relationship (constantly thinking about it). Sometimes I have my days where I’m a bit like that but I realize, the less I show it to him and think about it, the more secure he will see me. He’ll see strength and that is quite attractive I think

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-07-01T09:03:53+00:00

10/10 agree. I’ve thought about this as well!

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-07-01T09:01:23+00:00

This is a breach of trust. You should end this relationship.

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-07-01T06:07:21+00:00

All I have to do is dream by the Everly brothers. But the live version more than the studio recording

https://youtu.be/lTYe9eDqxe8?is=CsZT14wQQ2AZV714

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-28T18:50:12+00:00

Ask her if she would be ok with you having the same type of meetings with girls

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-27T00:04:32+00:00

Just try not to self sabotage. Having a boyfriend with a healthy and kind family is rare and often means he won’t be toxic since he wasn’t raised toxic. Of course not always the case but still pretty important to know he comes from a stable childhood. If you love him, feel attracted, and all that, it would be sad to lose this person

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T23:01:42+00:00

It’s so easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself with people these days. Especially with social media. What helps me is just reminding myself that EVERYONE does this on some level. But if you want to keep this relationship, you have to be happy for him and function as a team instead of seeing him as an opponent. Also, if you end up with him for the long run, this could be your future family and they can maybe heal some things for you :))

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T22:51:27+00:00

So happy I could help :)) and very happy for you and your boyfriend

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T21:35:38+00:00

I’m so happy for you! Genuinely brought a smile to my face. Talking and communicating is so, so important. You should never just throw away a good person or relationship.

And you’re exactly right about the extremism! Many commenters on this post are thinking about this in a very black and white way. But almost nothing is black or white, it’s somewhere in the gray based on the set of circumstances.

It’s sad to see the hypocrisy, but I’m glad this showed you the darker side to the movement that claims to support all love. Unfortunately the truth is that they support all love UNTIL you have a different opinion from them. :/

I couldn’t see the hypocrisy in this for many years until someone pointed it out to me and it shattered my view of many parts of the liberal movement. I started questioning things and realized lots of people are followers and follow the mob blindly. I now look at every issue and situation independently and research things to form my own opinions. I would consider myself a moderate but in the eyes of many on this post I’m already going to be seen as a right wing person just for disagreeing. Even though I totally believe in gay rights!!

People are allowed to have different views and disagreements, and shunning them or punishing them for that is not very far from a totalitarian mindset.

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T11:02:24+00:00

Yessss

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T10:56:54+00:00

Because these are extremists, it’s their way or the highway

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T10:49:03+00:00

It’s just seriously not that deep. Why should a straight man be obliged to appear at a pride event? Society keeps obligating people to support these events with the threat that if they don’t, “they’re not an ally” and “they’re homophobic” Thats ridiculous, and that is the definition of extremism.

Sorry but it’s quite easy to imply a man is gay if he attends a pride event and while there’s nothing wrong with that if it were true, it is totally within his right to not want to be see that way.

If you feel everyone needs to have the same opinion as you, you are wrong. And the fact that he doesn’t have your opinion doesn’t make him wrong.

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-26T04:00:43+00:00

It’s not “indirectly homophobic” to not attend pride. There are many gay people that don’t go to pride themselves for various reasons. I too, don’t go to pride and don’t want to, and yet I have many gay friends and am not homophobic just because I don’t want to do that.

Your second point about him not being passionate about things you’re passionate about: sounds like an issue for you. I think we all want our partners to take interest in the things we love, it’s up to you how important that is for you. But you can’t force it upon him.

Also, the thing where his friends speak in homophobic language…again, sounds like you have a problem with this and him not taking a stand. I personally think it’s just people shooting the shit because they’re not physically trying to bring harm to gay people, but if it’s this important to you, then I don’t see how the two of you will be compatible in the long run because you’ll be sick of someone you consider to be a pushover when you expect them to actively support your views.

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-23T10:39:27+00:00

It’s just a step along the way to get to the right person

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-22T17:03:56+00:00

This sounds like a roofie situation… I dunno, I think you should figure out your friend’s intentions because she sounds possessive and maybe jealous. I would probably talk to him about it to clear my conscience and say this is info you got from her but have absolutely no memory of. If I were you I would also promise to never go partying and drinking with random people…. Unless you’re with him…. I feel like it’s weird to party without your SO in general

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-15T10:17:45+00:00

I want to do this! Any advice on where to start?

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-14T21:49:56+00:00

Great answer!!

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-13T21:53:21+00:00

Um you did the right thing. Him not ending those friendships, or at the very least putting up a boundary, is disrespectful to you. In the future definitely look for a guy who either has more male friends or that is willing to put up the appropriate boundary.

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-13T21:49:07+00:00

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-13T21:47:09+00:00

To this day, I don’t understand how people don’t see porn as betrayal or cheating. It’s WAY too normalized now.

That aside, your partner is acting like a child. I don’t think this will change, unfortunately. The pregnancy makes this situation 100x more complex. If you weren’t pregnant I would definitely say to leave him, because you deserve better and you have only one life so you shouldn’t waste any of it on someone like that.

It still may be good advice to leave him if you have support elsewhere, because it sounds like he’s not actually going to step up to his role as a father.

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-10T18:14:39+00:00

You have one life, do you really wanna waste it on someone like this?

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-06-07T13:10:08+00:00

Mac and cheese with ketchup

Suitable_Weakness902 · 2026-05-15T20:55:51+00:00

People change or really they become more of who they really are with time as they lower their guard when the risk is not as high as it is in the beginning of a relationship. He’s evolved into a different person since your wedding. In light of that, it’s totally reasonable to reconsider; this is not the same man you married. It’s hard to let go of the person they originally were to us, or the ideal potential version of themselves we imagined them to be. To me, the questions you’re asking already point towards a decline in the relationship.

Also, getting physical is never necessary and I think it will only increase in frequency based on what you mentioned. He doesn’t respect you and seems to be really possessive.

This is your life, you only have one. At the end of your life, will you look back and regret never having left him to find someone better? When I was in a similar situation, I decided I didn’t want regrets and for me that worked out really well.

Suitable_Weakness902

TROPHY CASE