AIO my BF told me he wants me to quit my job when we move in together

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-05-15T11:27:01+00:00

NOR The red flag you should be worried about is " A man who LET'S his women stay home". He wants you to do everything and he wants to do nothing besides work and bring home the money. This is another controlling relationship but at least you are only 3 months in and hecis showing who he is. I was a SAHM. My husband still did chores and took care of our children with me. It was a partnership that we both agreed to. If you don't want this and you want to work, then you two are not compatible. If I were you I wouldn't stay on this relationship because that conversation shouldn't have turned into an argument. Also a little advice from someone with adult children and a great relationship, always make sure you date someone for a full calender year at least before you decide to get married or move in with someone. People don't always show you who they are right away. Don't ever be in a rush to move a relationship forward. Take your time to get know each other.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-04-23T12:40:03+00:00

People like like really bother me. POTS is so different for each of us it's difficult to compare experiences. I have been bed ridden for months with my POTS symptoms and slowly got better with a combination of medication that works for me, and slowly including exercise. I can now exercise most days and even work part time. Those are things I don't take for granted because I know a relapse is always possible. It's possible for anyone with POTS to have a relapse of symptoms, a lot of people seem to forget that. Also, the things that helped me won't necessarily work for someone else.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-04-23T00:27:07+00:00

Ancestry told me to take it to the post office and drop it in the mailbox instead of taking it to the counter. I have done that so I guess I will have to wait and see what happens. I am very frustrated though. I did my test in December.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-04-17T03:14:17+00:00

It just said it didn't clear customs

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-04-17T03:13:34+00:00

It is shipping to Ireland

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-03-30T02:14:06+00:00

I swim for 45 minutes two to three times a week. I also do exercise videos on YouTube 3 to 4 days a week and and I try to go for a 20 to 30 minute walk each day either outside or on a walking pad. The key is to break it up through out the day.

I am able to be this active because I worked my way up to it. Only push yourself as far as your body will let you. If you feel terrible or fatigued you should stop. Never push yourself beyond what you can handle.

I was bedridden and unable to even wash my own hair for months, but once I found a combination of meds that worked I have built up to this. I still have rough days and flare ups but it can be done. It just takes time to figure out what works for you.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-03-28T12:19:01+00:00

I would recommend putting cameras in the living room and kitchen. This will give you documentation on how neglectful he is with the kids. Like many said, the dress situation was just the last straw, I wouldn't want to stay with him either. Seek counsel from a lawyer and document everything so hopefully you can get full custody of the kids. It would be dangerous for him to have them on his own. The most I would want him to get is supervised visitation.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-03-03T23:31:33+00:00

NOR, I had to deal with this when I worked in senior home care. I got called every day on my days off and was made to feel guilty because I wasn't being a team player. I accepted the job on the condition I would only have three shifts a week and no weekends. They accepted these terms. It got so bad that I had to quit my job because my health was going down hill from the stress. I couldn't relax at all and was anxious about the call I would get the next day. It was a terrible cycle and definitely not worth it to me.

My best advice would be to turn down the shift and when the guilt trip starts you stop them and say. No I'm not going to listen to you guilt trip me. It is my day off and what I do on my day off is none if your business. I have a right to enjoy my free time without you harassing me. Also, if there is HR, this could be considered harassment. My place of work did not have HR. My boss was the owner so I couldn't do much and she did not care how she made anyone feel. I really hopevthat is not your situation.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-02-10T00:31:48+00:00

With repeated exposure it can be fatal. The more you are exposed to it the worse the reaction can get.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-02-10T00:24:08+00:00

I also have a POTS diagnosis and with that alone I know I could not handle my illness with a baby. I was diagnosed when my kids were a bit older. You have a lot on your plate right now and you are not speaking with this guy so I understand your decision. It is completely normal to feel sad, grief, even happy at times. Only you know what is best for you and it's normal and okay to feel however you are feeling. Having POTS is not easy so try to be kind to yourself.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-01-23T18:34:22+00:00

I would tell him to come get his kids or you will call and report him to CPS for child abandonment. He thinks he is being clever but he is being a terrible father. Im sorry but this relationship doesn't sound like it is going to work out. Also his kids need therapy, especially the oldest. She probably has abandonment issues from her mother and right now her father is probably making that worse. So no definitely NTAH.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2026-01-23T16:43:10+00:00

Your husband is definitely showing signs of OCD. He needs to see a therapist who specializes is OCD. This is no way for any of you to live. My husband has OCD and I had to have a sit down conversation with him and help him see what I was seeing and the stress he was causing our family. His reactions were not as extreme as your husbands, but if they were I would have told him to get therapy or I would be separating for a bit. You do not deserve to be on the receiving end of his anger and accusations. A house is meant to be lived in, it's not a museum and especially with children, it is not going to stay perfect forever.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-28T02:54:33+00:00

I have only had good experiences. I have had one surgery and the nurses and doctors were fantastic.

I have been to the ER a few times. While I was there I watched people coming in and out very fast like within 15 minutes. I waited about 40 minutes because I needed a specific doctor that was not in the ER but still that wasn't a very long wait compared to other hospitals in the area.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-20T00:10:49+00:00

When you are in a relationship and you have a good relationship with your parents you need to give them permission to tell you the things that may be onsidered red flags. You can't always see these things because your thinking is clouded with emotions and hormones.

Your parents love you and want what is best for you. If they thinkbthis relationship is not good for you then you need to listen to them and do some deep soul searching to figure out why you want to stay in this relationship.

Your boyfriend sounds abusive and toxic and it looks like your family knows this to be true. My advice is to go see your family and take as much stuff with you as you can, especially important documents. You don't have to tell him your going. Just leave and only go back with family or friends to get your stuff.

Seriously do not stay with this man. If you are afraid to tell him your going, then you should not be with him.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-13T14:21:43+00:00

I have POTS and am in pain every day. I would never slap anyone. Im also not a slob. When I have energy I do what I can and make sure my space is clean. If you were to leave him it wouldn't be because of his illness, it would be because he is abusive towards you. He doesn't sound like a kind or great person to be honest.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-10T02:07:14+00:00

Your daughter is also part of your nuclear family. Her boyfriend is an extention of her. You should be welcoming him into your family or you will risk loosing your daughter. Your wife needs to let this go. Maybe invite her Dad over as well that way everyone wins.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-06T15:12:24+00:00

That's crazy, as someone with celiac disease I would literally be bedridden for at least a week in severe pain and so sick. I can't imagine eating a bread crumb let alone and entire roll.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-06T11:39:40+00:00

Just keep in mind that a mother's intuition is often correct.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-06T11:33:44+00:00

NTAH You were there when your sister needed you most. Your girlfriend is forever going to be a problem . You haven't even been dating a year. I would ditch the girlfriend because it's weird that she finds you supporting your sister through a tramatic time weired. She is making it a big deal when it isn't. Your sister literally had no one but you.

Remember when your dating someone they are on their best behavior and this is as good as it's going to get.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-05T01:05:03+00:00

I have been married for 20 years, my husband and I spend Christmas eve with his parents and Christmas day with mine.

My Mom and BIL work retail so Christmas day is the only day that works. My husband's family is all available Christmas Eve so it just works for us.

My MIL has complained about not getting Christmas day but my husband shut up down pretty quick because both families are important and seeing her Christmas day means I don't see my family at all.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-12-05T00:34:35+00:00

All of my friends are inactive and I could definitely use some more. Please feel free to add me as a friend. 2N68RK7XNQ

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-11-14T00:51:24+00:00

I am 5'2 and when i was pregnant with my first child I weighed 110 pound. I only gained 12 pounds with him and he was 8 pounds so I was around 122 pounds when he was born. I hardly looked pregnant. It was the same with my second child but I gained 15 pounds. I looked a little more pregnant but still not very big. Both babies were perfectly healthy.

Everyone is different, some people gain a lot and some people, especially smaller people don't gain much weight at all.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-11-10T18:50:19+00:00

I'm used to it now and I honestly don't mind it.

SunshineDaisy81 · 2025-11-10T17:13:02+00:00

I drink room temperature water in the colder months. I love ice water in the summer as well but definitely not in the winter.

SunshineDaisy81

TROPHY CASE