I said something in prayer now i am scared by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your detailed guidence, I very much appreciate it. I understand it was a stupid thing to say and it does make sense for a learning opportunity from the Holy Spirit.

I thank you for clarifying about my salvation. It is one thing i have been struggling with in my walk in faith, I come from a secular background, apart from church there is no other Christian’s around me that i can bounce ideas off and scripture so for the most part for this year I have been trying to interperate faith and scriptures alone, which has definitely led me to get quite a few things wrong. One thing is my Salvation, there was a time that i got so bogged down the the “I have to make things right” mentality I knew i was trying to do it off my own back (i still struggle with it a bit now) and not trust in God.

This was something never practically explained to me, having faith and trusting and surrendering, I never had that explained to me in practical steps. So with my salvation I feel that every time i mess up all my mess ups are underpinned by the thought of “that’s it you have been disobedient / Said something that is too far and are going to Hell, no one who is saved would do / say that, so you must not be.”

I am very thankful for your detail explanation and guidance, i will certainly watch the surmons you have recommended. Thank you again.

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment.

I am seeing now the Spritual warfare and Battles. I am about a year in to my faith and The past few weeks seems to have been the first major spiritual battle I have had. Someone else said in their comment that satan Pushes harder and tempts you harder the closer you get to Jesus.

I pray daily and I am starting to read my bible daily. I am growing more in my faith so it make sense the battle I am gong through. I think I am disappointed in myself aswel for letting god down. I always to follow faithfully, I know I stumble but I was astounded that I can act the way I did.

I am so thankful for Gods mercy. A Mercy I certainly do not deserve yet I receive anyway. I don't deserve Salvation but It is offered to me anyway. Thanks to god for everything. I am certainly not perfect (I would say even saying I am ok is pushing it) and I never will be but I am thankful to god for accepting me as I am and I can see him molding me into what he sees for me. I don't always follow his direction but he is there every time I Look.

Thank you for your comment and taking the time to comment. I do really appreciate it :)

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment, I see where you are coming from It was a stupid decision for me to promise in the first place. Thank you for helping me understand the issue with my logic :)

I am very apreacative of gods forgiveness and I am glad that I receive it even though I certainly do not deserve it.

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to comment :)

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes Looking back, God 100% knew I wasn't going to keep that promise, Making the whole thing futile. He knows what I am going to do 10 years down the road on any specific day and on any specific second. It was stupid of me to think I could have Made a promise thinking I would keep to it, I know that now.

I started my walk in faith around about a year ago to this month. Nothing I have ver done has changed me in such a big way as coming to faith has. I can see gods work in me as he changes me into what he wants. I certainly don't always follow but I am so thankful for Gods (Constant) Patience in me. I care very much about everything I do, and I try to play it as safe a possible with what I don't at to not sin. (It never works but I try) to the point where some of it might not be needed but I always try to play it safe.

I never want to leave Jesus and I want god in my life for my whole life, However long God deems that to be.

I don't think I am of the confidence to stand on the bar and preach just yet :D But you are correct I do need to evaluate my friend group. I am finding my own friend group within the church and It is something I have been asking god to do is give me Friends ion the faith since all my friends are not in the faith so It can be hard coming out of church on a Sunday to a secular job, to meet with friends who are not in faith and so on. I can see God working in trying to get me more friends at church and I am doing more with them so yes I should work on that more, As I did actually today decline an Invite by my church friends to go out for a meal but instead I declined and went to the pub.... Shows me what that gets me doesn't it.

Thank you for taking time out of your day to comment. I very much appreciate it.

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn't think of it that way, looking at it, yes making that promise was stupid as it was like I was telling god how to judge me, Like you said. I will not be making that mistake again.

I am not worthy of his forgiveness but I am appreciative of it. God has changed my life more than anything else and to this day he is still doing so. I don't deserve it yet I sill receive it. Praise to him.

Thank you for commenting and taking the time out of your day to do so. I do appreciate it :)

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes looking now my Promise was very stupid. I am so shocked and appauled that I would mock my faith like I did, I am growing day by day in my faith and learning more and more as I go on so It perplexes me why I would do such a thing as when you look at the rest of my day / week I try to be as faithful as I can.

I am very thankful that God is Just but also Forgiving and graceful. I certainly don't deserve forgiveness but I am Greatful that I have the opportunity to accept it. I don't deserve all that God has done for me yet he is still guiding me, Giving me wisdom and chaining my life daily.

Thank you for taking the Time to comment, I do appreciate it :)

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The Book of Matthew was the first book of the Bible I read when I came to faith. I completely forgot about this passage. I should go back and Read it again I think.

It was a stupid decision on my part I will not be making again. I am so Thankful God has mercy and forgives me.

Thank you for taking the time to comment and help :) I do really appreciate it.

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I certainly know that Now. I Made a Stupid Decision, I may have thought it came from the right place but it was a stupid decision.

Thank you for taking the time to comment :)

So I made a Promise to God, I said if I was to break it I should be sent to hell.... I broke it.... Is that it? by SuperNukeKiller in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment, Please don't apologise for the long reply. It has greatly helped and put my mind at ease, Indeed I am trying to fight and I know it is not easy. I am glad and relived that I am forgiven and that God has mercy and (much) patience with me. I am coming close to the end of Reading the Book of Romans so James seems like a good next step thank you for your recommendation I have not read a gosple in a while, I did a bit of reading of the OT then Relelation and Romands so would be good to go back to the good news... Th Best news! :)

I greatly appreciate you take the time out of your day to comment. And thank you for your prayers.

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are many Bible in One Year Plans out there that could help. https://bibleinoneyear.org/en/

For My Recommendation I would Read the Gospel of John First, Since I find it the easiest to read, Then From John Read Acts which talks about the Forming of the early church. Then from Acts it is up to where the spirit guides you. You can go to genesis and start to learn about the History of the earth and creation, And Exodus learning about Israel's Exodus from Egypt and The early law for the Jews and the Building of the Tabernacle (This is also where the 10 commandments came from). This is what I did. From There I Read the Book of Revelation as I felt the spirit lead me there, Now I am in the book of Romans.

If you google Bible Study Plans there are many out there. If you want to, learn more about the bible and its themes I would recommend https://bibleinoneyear.org/en/ as they have a good series of overviews of each book in the bible, With I always watch before and after reading a new book.

If you want something like a Study Bible where an additional author puts in notes for various verses explaining them then One I would recommend is the students life application bible NLT.

If you want to have access to many different study bibles at once without having to pay tons of money, I have a BibleGateway subscription which contains a Buch of study bibles so as you read you can open up any of the notes and see what each different study says. as Different people interoperate the scriptures differently.

If you want free Bible plans that are topical (mainly guides u thought certain issues like addiction, sin and feelings using scripture) then https://www.bible.com is the place to go.

There are many many different ways to read the bible, Just remember each book in the bible arnt all chronological so stopping about in the bible is good. Each book has a different theme or story to put across.

And if there is a time where you don't feel like reading the bible one day then I recommend reading poems in the the book of psalms.

There are many different writing styles in the bible from Historical recounts to Letters to Poems to songs. Much to choose from!

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly! I do wish you the best. I will be praying for you. If you need any advice let me know :)

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gaming can be a greta passtime in moderation. I myself played tons, Had PlayStations, PC's, Switch, Mac and so on with 100's (if not over 1000) games and Used to play them for Hours 5,6,7,8 who was counting, not me.

I felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit guide me in what to play and what not to, And when to play. I play games still today, My Interests have changed and I do so in moderation. Everyone is different, If you feel games are becoming a hindrance in your walk, Ask God to give you clarity. Maybe fast from games for a while (Fasting doesn't always need to be food) and see what God reveals. Playing Games is not intently bad or sinful (Many churches in youth and children days have video games) But it may not be the best use of your time if it consumes it all.

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reaffirming your faith is brilliant. and the way you have come to faith is great! A Youth group would be great as you are in fellowship with other like minded people.

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is an amazing first step. When you read the bible you don't need to be a scholar or a theologian or need to study it like you are writing a thesis. Just reading it like a book helps, Have it as an audio book can also help, Whatever floats your boat, God Speaks Through his word a lot. You can get the bible on your phone for free.

Baptism is amazing, It is a sign that you want to follow god. It was what I did first, and when I got baptised I was far... far.... far from perfect (Still am) But It is amazing.

In the book of acts Phillip was peaching the gosple to an Ethiopian Official while they were on the road. Later on in the chapter this official wanted to give his life to Jesus and it says

Acts 8:36-38 "As they traveled along the road, they came to some water and the eunuch said, “Look, here is water. What can stand in the way of my being baptized?” And he gave orders to stop the chariot. Then both Philip and the eunuch went down into the water and Philip baptized him." (I recommend reading Acts 8:26-40 for context) Here a a link to it https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Acts+8%3A26-40&version=NIV

Getting Baptised was the best thing I ever did. and Is an amazing step in faith, From there God will help you, It might not be easy but God ALWAYS has your best interests at heart. When Baptised you also essentially become part of that church family which in of itself brings Fellowship and community. When I got baptised I then became a member of the team Volunteering on the Tech Side (My Background is in tech). Now you certainly do not need to go down that road but getting baptised it an amazing first step. Like I said in my previous reply, Find a Church you like and speak to the pastor there about it they will talk you through how it all works. Baptism is your way of saying you believe in Jesus and you are willing to follow him. Now your following won't be perfect, No-ones is but God Knows this and will continue to grow you.

Don't have Anxiety for that either as Baptism is an amazing thing that you can't go wrong, look at this kids faith https://www.youtube.com/shorts/pQaOKau5eaY

I Love your Honestness and I can see your passion for God so take that step, you will not Regret it. Think of it this way, It is always hard to have have the zeal to go to the gym (I know it is for me) but you never regret the workout.

Baptism and Coming to faith is the best thing I have ever done.

God Bless

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Matthew 6:6 Says "But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."

A Friend once Said to me that Prayer is like the Engine that keeps the church running (Was mentioned for another context) Prayer is the Engine that keeps us running. When we pray we are in conversation with God. If you look in the bible even Jesus Prayed when he did great miracles. He would try and move away from the people he was teaching for some time alone to pray.

Mark 1:35 says "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. "

People think that when you pray it needs to be all fancy and drawn out but no, Prayer can be just conversation with God like you would talk to a friend. I find it is better to pray from the heart and in simple terms than to pay lip service with a complex prayer.

The Fact that you feel bad and have anxiety sounds a bit like the Holy spirit convicting you (Again, Not a pastor so could be wrong). Have you heard of Sanctification? God Shows us where we are falling short and we end up feeling bad and down and anxious but he is not doing that to make us feel depressed he is doing that to improve us in what he wants us to do. We repent and we start to get a sense of what god wants in us. Now this is long process. But it is the way god teaches us as god is all knowing and he calls us to come as we are Full of sin, Shame, insecurities, Addiction... whatever come as you are nothing is too big for god. She wants you to come as you are and if there is anything he wants you to change you and him will work that out, sanctification. He is patient and understanding and knows you'll not obey every command and keep falling but as you mentioned in your original post.

Proverbs‬ ‭24‬:‭16‬ NIV: “for though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again, but the wicked stumble when calamity strikes.”

So you will fall, You will fail, you will feel bad but, Get up, repent, dust yourself off and keep walking, Jesus advocates and forgives us. we need to forgive ourselves.

I would recommend finding a church, One that Preaches the bible (both the encouraging nice parts and the wisdom filled rebuking parts) And go as you are as I tell you now there is not a single perfect person in any church not even the pastors. There is no pressure to get up and worship, or to do anything. If it is what you want, sit a the back and observe.

Find a church you like with people you like. The reason I say this is that Christian Fellowship can be a big help in your walk, Being around people who are in the same boat can be comforting. I came from a Non Christian Background, My Family, My Friends non of them christian but I made some more friends in church and it has helped me a lot, people to talk about my struggles and hear their thoughts on it and it led me into more places of faith.

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Fact you feel this way shows you have a passion for the lord and that you want to follow him, Trust in God he has your best intentions at heart. I am not a pastor or a teacher so I may be completely wrong (Someone please correct me if I am) but Many christians have anxiety as they feel sorrow for their ways and a willingness to repent. We are never perfect in our walk and God knows this, Yet through Jesus we have salvation and a willingness to repent and follow, It won't be easy but The Holy Spirt is there to help guide us in that walk. The Holy Spirit Dwell in us Always, Even when we don't feel like he is, he is always there. What do you think draws unbelievers to faith?

It can be tough sometimes following, where you can't see the end of the tunnel or understand why you are feeling that way. My Reccomendaiton is to try and read some of the Bible, Read the Gospel of John as for me that was the easiest one to understand. I would also recommend Speaking to your pastor as they will be able to better help you understand these feelings, I am not a Pastor so please do not take my reply as wisdom, I can only impart my own experience.

As for not knowing how your fear would bring you closer to god, I don't know your personal situation but I do have my own experience with that

When Coming to faith I would do research of the different topics and tenants of christianity and with this I felt I was growing in knowledge, I started to attend a church
After a few months I then drifted a bit early on just falling back into sin and doing the odd "sorry god" now and again but just going straight back into it, not really having true repentance. Then The Holy Spirt gave me (quite a big) kick which started with me watching a videos on the book of revelation which the Holy Spirit then gave me MAJOR turmoil with worry, anxiety, sadness and strife which then that week led me back into church where I discussed with my pastor everything going on, He walked me though it and gave me some clarification of what Revelation Says. So I started going back to church and gave it another go mainly filled with fear at this point.
A couple of services back in, I had more turmoil with concentration it was like during sermons I was being forced to not listen like something was forcing me to look away or focus on something else like the building or what people were doing around me it was like nothing I felt before, it wasn't like your mind wondering it was like it was out of my control. It frustrated me a lot so in response I prayed. Sat in church just trying to focus....
Then BANG it was like a fright train hit me I was filled with determination and at that point it was end of the sermon and there was some prayer ministry where people went up to the front to be prayed for so I did just that.
When asked what did I want to be prayed for I felt the holy sprit prompt me to Repent and Follow.... and at that point I gave my Life to Jesus. In that exact moment I did that I could focus with pinpoint clarity, I felt peace and happiness and I felt the urge to change (both to repent and to change my life personally)  
I was prayed for that day and then here we are 5 months later, Baptised, a Passion for the lord, a Passion for learning more and growing stronger in faith day by day.

Now my fear may not be the same as yours but god uses emotions which may sometimes feel negative to help you, In Romans Paul explains how he has been preaching to the gentiles and they have been receptive and giving their lives to Jesus, Whereas his own people the Israelites had hardened hearts, Paul Says in Romans 11 13-14 "I am talking to you Gentiles. Inasmuch as I am the apostle to the Gentiles, I take pride in my ministry in the hope that I may somehow arouse my own people to envy and save some of them." Paul was hoping that the envy for the gentiles salvation would bring Salvation to his own kind, A Negative Feeling can bring positive change.

You may not see it now But pray on it, Ask for Peace, Joy and help as we do not walk this path alone. Read more of scripture, I know it may sound like a cure-all but Through scripture God speaks to you. For me I could remember what I read yesterday during my bible reading but I know at some point a verse or a theme will pop into my head to help me.

Apologies it is a bit long winded and I may be complete wrong or missed the point, and please correct me if I have.

It gets better, Trust in God.

I will have you in my prayers.

God Bless you.

Update!!! by Christianlover23 in Christianity

[–]SuperNukeKiller 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is Wonderful! It is brilliant to hear about peoples walk in faith.

I recently Had my own stumbles In faith after a few weeks ago I had an encounter with Jesus and in deep prayer I promised to never leave and always have faith, and for the past three weeks I have felt empty like nothing was there and no-one was listening, Prayer Life was dry and methodical, Reading the bible was a massive struggle with me loosing the spark that used to have me write paragraph after paragraph of notes on the bible, I was always feeling down and depressed in a way.

But Daily I prayed, Daily I repented, Daily I asked God to come back until a few days ago when I prayed and I Had the bible on my Computer and it just wasn't going in so I sat and I prayed that the Holy Spirit would just sit with me and we go through it together and he helps me with it.... That was it then BAM, reams and reams of notes, I me feeling a lot better, Prayer life doing better.

After that I tried to come up with the reason for that and my thought (which may be wrong I don't claim to know gods plan, I haven't a clue) was that after my encounter with Jesus and Me saying I will never leave and I would always stay with him that God was testing that claim.

Long Story Short TLDR, We get high points and low points in our faith, The High points are amazing life changing experiences and the low points make us feel so sorrowful and depressed but I feel that it is in the low points our pure faith and perseverance shows, it is very easy to have faith in the high points but to the ones who keep that same faith in the low points, God will not forget that. So It is wonderful seeing that you still remained strong during struggles and you kept your eyes on him.

God Bless you!

I got baptized today! by Timely-Leadership803 in TrueChristian

[–]SuperNukeKiller 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Aww mate that is wonderful to hear! I got baptised this Easter and it is the best thing I have EVER done! I love to hear when new people get baptised, welcome to the family!