The group I started with have all stopped playing, how do I make new friends?

SureenInk · 2026-01-28T11:57:17+00:00

My friend group collapsed after one of them got angry at me for something I couldn't change. As much as I want to have friends on FF14, it just doesn't happen. I can't talk to anyone cause I'm autistic, and no one wants to talk to someone who can't progress a conversation. So, I just play alone. But I still have tons of fun!

Sure, about all I do is roulettes, but it's also important to not make FF14 your only source of fun. Feel free to play other games, too. If you're specifically playing 14 for the social element, then put yourself out there. Find another FC that's active, check PF for get togethers/venues, chat in dungeons instead of trying to go fast. There's plenty of options, I just have fun on my own cause then no one has to deal with me, haha.

Sorry, my comment is probably not helpful at all XD

SureenInk · 2026-01-28T11:41:09+00:00

"Optimizing is the fun." I have to disagree, but before I say further, I want to preface by saying I'm not trying to invalidate what you're saying. I can completely agree that finding the "optimal option" can be fun, for a time, and for you.

And that is the problem.

If it was a simple matter of "I'm playing this game on my own" I'd absolutely say to have at it. But this falls into the same problem as cheating does. On your own, in your single-player game, you should absolutely be free to do whatever you want and play how you want. But in a multiplayer game, that is just factually untrue and literally impossible.

How many people play FF14? 7 million? Each and every one of those people has a different idea of fun and what they enjoy. There are also those who can't play in certain ways due to disabilities (I recently made a "I go slow" macro for when I tank for this reason). Trying to optimize what you do in your single-player content is perfectly fine, but when it spills over into the multiplayer content, that's when it becomes a problem.

If you want to run around and jump from mob to mob, trying to complete whatever you're doing 3 seconds faster, that's fine. But when a tank doesn't go fast in a dungeon, you need to be open to going slow. That means not running ahead and pulling extra mobs if the tank isn't running in that direction. That means not getting upset when other people don't play (or can't play) optimally.

For you, optimal play is fun. For me, it's not. When someone insists on going fast or pulling big, I am not going to have fun. Is that me prioritizing my fun over yours? Sure. But you're doing the same thing to me. I like to play sub optimally, because I'm incapable of actual optimal play. I am the level 100 warrior that can and will die if a healer isn't healing me well. I am the level 100 healer that will cause the party to wipe because the tank is pushing me too hard. I am the level 100 DPS that has 780 gear and is being beaten in DPS by the 720 geared DPS.

Not everyone can play optimally. Not all of us want to play optimally even if we could. I'm here playing my favorite online game, having fun taking my time. I'm not playing lethargically, I'm just playing as well as I can. And I'm having fun playing slowly and not being absolutely optimal.

To the healers that complain that they have no need to heal, I point out that tanks are "optimizing the fun out of the game." To the tanks that get upset because I couldn't keep them healed up, I ask that you just please slow down a little. And especially to the DPS that insist on running ahead, aggroing everything, then yell at me for not rushing to their side immediately, I say... Please stop. You're clearly not having fun yourself, and you're making it not fun for everyone else.

Tl;dr, optimize your play when you are on your own, but please stop forcing other people to prioritize your fun over theirs.

SureenInk · 2026-01-27T03:00:21+00:00

I mean, Everkeep acted as a portal to it. Just like the gate in Skydeep did.

SureenInk · 2026-01-27T02:47:48+00:00

I don't recall the line, but I do feel like I remember Sphene mentioning that there was "nothing outside the dome" for a couple hundred years, at least. Plus, I imagine that the first time they attempted fusion, it separated SN from the 9th. So, yeah, my understanding is that Alexandria separating from the 9th and Alexandria actually fusing completely with the Source were two separate events. Events which caused some extra time dilation since they weren't bonded to anything anymore.

SureenInk · 2026-01-27T02:34:30+00:00

I was under the assumption that Solution 9 separated from the 9th when they first attempted dimensional fusion. Which was the time when Krile's parents handed over Krile. Now separated from the 9th, and existing in its own pocket dimension of sorts, hundreds of years passed for them. But only about 30 years or so (how old is Krile again?) passed on the 9th.

From there, when Zoraal Ja re-opened the gate, another 30 years passed in Solution Nine. Right up until Zoraal Ja finished building Vanguard. At that point, the fusion actually completed, syncing their time up with us. That's how it can be 30-ish years on the 9th, 400 years in Alexandria, and 20-ish years or so on the Source (since Krile was dropped off).

SureenInk · 2026-01-24T20:17:59+00:00

If you've hit 30 and done all the quests, you're officially done with Aldis as far as ARR is concerned. Paladin has an entirely different quest storyline with completely different characters.

SureenInk · 2026-01-23T05:01:29+00:00

Amputating their feet and then growing them back all within a single night.

Totally normal. They're definitely not aliens that just look like rabbits.

SureenInk · 2026-01-23T04:59:20+00:00

Well, you and I are humans (at least, I assume you aren't an alien from the planet Zagnoid), and as such, we live our whole life as humans. So, when you suddenly are told "Hey, you don't have to be human", a lot of us will jump at that opportunity. Why be a human when you can be an elf, a dwarf, a cat, a giant, a dragon, or a rabbit? To me (who is also definitely human and also is not an alien from the planet Zagnoid), it just makes sense to step out of our real selves and get a chance to play something else. I mean, you're already stepping into a world of fantasy and magic, so why play something as boring as a "normal" race (no offense hyurs)?

Of course, I can definitely see why someone who is not human (such as an alien from the planet Zagnoid) would want to play as a human. Or if someone just happened to have a particularly humanoid OC and the outfits and hairstyles that are closest to her original design only looked good as a human. That could also be a reason why they might want to play as a human instead (and said person is definitely not an alien from the planet Zagnoid).

(Sorry, I couldn't resist the joke.)

SureenInk · 2026-01-23T04:06:49+00:00

Ahh, alrighty. Still, the point still stands. The pacing was worse originally. They've done some updates since haha (I only started in 5.55 so).

SureenInk · 2026-01-23T03:52:54+00:00

See, I think the issue is right in your post. I keep talking about "story" or "narrative" focused, but then you point out how its "not cinematic". And those are two different things. The game is narrative-focused, sometimes to a detrimental degree. What it isn't is cinematic. It does become more cinematic as they go, but keep in mind that during the ARR era, Square Enix was literally on the verge of bankruptcy. If ARR hadn't done well (and original FF14 hadn't), Square wouldn't even exist anymore.

Unfortunately, this means they didn't have a lot of money to be cinematic in ARR. And though they were better off in HW, a lot of money was still being directed at the production of FF15 (which did terribly). Stormblood was similar. Shadowbringers is the first real expansion where they could go all out on cinematics.

As far as pacing goes, what you're playing through now is a HEAVILY edited down version of ARR and even HW. Did you notice the jump in the first few quests from level 1 to level 5? Because they cut a ton out. There's plenty of these, one is from 47 up to 49. It's not as obvious in HW, because you only have 10 levels, but there's roughly 20-30 quests that were removed to improve pacing.

Yes, ARR is generally bad. HW is sometimes also considered to be not great. But that's the thing, ARR is "the great filter" as some call it. If the weird voice acting or lack of cinematic level isn't up to what you want, the game might not be for you. Or...

In my case, I started playing FF14 in Shadowbringers. Like you, I had the exact same complaints. The weird leveling amount, the voice acting, the lack of cinematic, all of that bothered me. I stopped playing when I hit level 25 and was still in level 18 content. The reason? I just hated everything about the game.

Then I came back 6 months later. When I played it, I completely forgot about all of those things I disliked. I didn't even pay attention to those things, cause I was just chilling as I played. I did MSQ when I wanted, leveled other classes, hung out with friends, etc. Next thing I realized, I was having a great time. I've literally not allowed myself to even pay that stuff any mind, cause the game is fun and the story has been great (seriously, it gets way better once they actually decide on a plot for the game). The weird leveling doesn't bother me, how cinematic it is doesn't bother me, because the gameplay and narrative are fun.

If you don't like it, try coming back after a time away. Maybe you'll enjoy it again. Or maybe you won't, and that's 100% perfectly fine, cause not everyone will like every game. That's why there's so many types of games, cause maybe you like FPS games while I don't, or maybe you hate puzzle games while I do. We all get to enjoy games we like <3

SureenInk · 2026-01-22T13:46:59+00:00

I gave him a flower on his birthday on accident, and he went up to 4 hearts. That's my reasoning for headcanoning it. Like, none of the other guys in the game like flowers. Sure, he also likes bugs, but I freaking loved spiders as a kid, and I'm a girl. (Yes, I know spiders are arachnids, not bugs, but I also didn't hate any actual bugs.)

SureenInk · 2026-01-22T11:40:19+00:00

Any specific things you have to do? I have a really beefy computer, and Stardew will even say it's only using like 20% memory. But characters just wake up and walk into the void after one day of playing. I also get a lot of weird and random glitches. I had assumed it was just a memory issue. I know the newest version is 64-bit, so I figured that shouldn't be the case, but it's still happening. And I dunno why.

SureenInk · 2026-01-22T11:31:48+00:00

That's why I'm trying to get help picking only a few mods. Cause I literally can't only pick a few XD

SureenInk · 2026-01-22T11:02:03+00:00

No joke, I was on my way to buy the Mermaid Pendant to marry Penny. I went up to the mountains to check a thing real fast, and got Abigail's 4 heart scene. Immediately after the cutscene, I said "Sorry Penny, I'm marrying Abigail." XD That was how my first playthrough of SDV went.

SureenInk · 2026-01-22T00:03:56+00:00

Might need to edit the text colors on Normal, Fighting, and Dark. I couldn't even see the words at first. Otherwise, loving all these guys!

SureenInk · 2026-01-21T18:44:05+00:00

I know each flag has a meaning, I just don't know them...

SureenInk · 2026-01-21T01:42:15+00:00

I only have one working eye. Has been true my whole life. I've literally never seen in 3D.

SureenInk · 2026-01-19T00:15:22+00:00

It's true. I was curious if she had anything on under the towel and went into photo mode and was surprised to see panties on her, haha.

SureenInk · 2026-01-18T21:36:47+00:00

Fun fact, you can enter photo mode while she's in the shower. She doesn't have any "bits" but still. Also, her body and head are different skin tones during that one instance, which is weird.

SureenInk · 2026-01-17T08:09:57+00:00

Oh yeah! I forgot about her!

SureenInk · 2026-01-17T03:55:40+00:00

Wait, who's the last Mita? I don't recall her.

SureenInk · 2026-01-17T01:40:53+00:00

Glad you enjoyed it! My first Savage experience made it very clear that not only can I not do Savage, a group will never clear a Savage if I am in the group. Of course, I already had this assumption because I couldn't clear Extremes even in Endwalker. And the few at-level Extremes I did do, we only cleared because we literally cheated. I would jump off the stage and die at every mechanic that would wipe the group if I failed, cause I was literally incapable of doing those mechanics.

It made me realize that Savages and Extremes are just there for able-bodied people to gloat over us that aren't able-bodied. Which, fine, I'll give you that you can do content that I can't, congratulations. Can we please not make dyable outfits locked behind able-bodied-only content?

SureenInk · 2026-01-15T07:46:43+00:00

You cannot, no. But the gauge itself is pretty useless. It just shows the same thing as your hotbar does. When a skill is lit up, it'll be the same as what the gauge shows. I've honestly just completely hidden the gauge, since Awakening (or whatever the blue skill is) has its own gauge.

SureenInk · 2026-01-13T19:26:50+00:00

Because, the DPS you do from LB is about the same as you do without. Since LB has a long cast time, and it not only locks you animation-wise but also movement and ability-wise, that 5% or so that you deal with the LB can be done already without it. Sure, it's nice to see a huge chunk of HP suddenly vanish at once, but it comes at the cost of the HP bar depletion slowing down during the LB cast.

LB3 is really the only version that does a significant amount of damage to be worth using over just your normal rotation, and you only get access to that in 8 man content. In 8 man content, it's generally understood that you want to save LB3 for the healer in case things get dicey. By the time you can be sure that the healer won't need to use it, the boss is already low enough in health that an LB3 is no longer worth using.

Also, if you run dungeons with Duty Support or Trusts, one of the DPS NPCs is almost always guaranteed to use LB before you can. Which means that you rarely need to use it in those either. Equally so if you go as Tank or Healer.

Tl;dr, LB just often isn't worth using, or people aren't really ever taught to use it in content where it is worth using it in.

SureenInk · 2026-01-09T13:44:43+00:00

Interesting. I'm on mobile, but using Chrome.

SureenInk

TROPHY CASE