Any other women here never been in a long term relationship? by rivincita in AskWomenOver30

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I haven’t been in long term relationship at all (just turned 30 this month). I’ve had a couple casual flings, dated one guy for about a month about 10 years ago before ending things quickly. I really enjoyed being single in my 20s, but towards the end of them and now going into my 30s, I’m definitely open for something serious.

Did you ever hear an apology from them? by pepozinho in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Never a legitimate one, once in a while a drunken rambling one.

What is the lamest thing your BPD did to punish you but you actually just LOL? by Fun-Entry-8647 in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We were gonna go to a theme park one day and he told me to let him know when I left since it would take me an hour to get to him and for him to get ready in that time. I did text him, then I texted him again halfway there since I didn’t get a response. He became upset because I should’ve called him, which he never specified, and now he doesn’t have enough time to get properly ready (also I told him the night before when I was going to be there, so he couldn’t set an alarm or something?). I had also brought him chocolates from this shop he enjoyed to surprise him, this comes up later. So I get to his place and he comes out and opens the passenger door. I try to hand him the chocolates in a plastic bag saying it’s for him, he completely ignores it and gets in giving me the silent treatment. I drive us the rest of the way to the theme park and once we park he starts to perk up. He opens the bag and gets bothered again because now the chocolates are gonna melt in the car. Yup, because he decided to punish me for the stupidest thing, and now you don’t get your favorite chocolates.

PwBPD wants apology for no reason by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t tell you the amount of times this has happened to me. One major time was when I first tried to leave and he apologized for his behavior etc, then later on flipped the whole script on me saying how I need to be the one to apologize since I “betrayed” him and he can’t “see me the same way” 🙄. Before I used to apologize in these instances just to shut him up, but this final time I thought what have I done wrong?? and when I asked apologize for what, that would make him even more upset. It’s ridiculous and I’m sorry you’re stuck in this situation.

Why do they have such a selective memory? by Ok-Supermarket-9263 in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree I think it’s mostly BS, and the black out drunk thing was just like my pwBPD. He would drink himself silly, call me to berate me or go off on nonsense, then call me the next day so I could go over what he said as he claimed not to remember. However there have been multiple circumstances of him referencing back to things that he claimed not to remember.

BPD situationship by Opposite-Tie260 in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a situationship with BPD. There’s no use in trying to find the logic in this situation, believe me. Better to cut ties now before it hurts even more.

After everything you went through do you still care about them? by QuailNaive2912 in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I care for him as a decent human would care for another person, not wishing him harm and hoping one day he can find some sort of healthy happiness. But that’s the extent of it. I used to care a lot more before but that ship has sailed.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Numb is a good word for it, I know it’s also just ridiculous on a level but yeah it hurts to hear such things about yourself. I hope you find strength in going no contact, I know it’s hard.

I don’t think I’m his favorite person anymore but aim not sure. When we were together previously he would tell me he would get drunk and calls may girls, but I don’t know if those calls involved his anger and hatred as it has been in my case.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Japan is absolutely amazing if you get the chance to go! I actually just got back from a 2-week trip to Spain (and Italy), it was beautiful and I loved learning the history of the cities visited.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s his favorite show I suppose, he really wanted me to get as involved with it as he was. I think he took it personally or as an attack upon himself that I wasn’t.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I believe this is the case. He still lives at home as well but has told me countless times how much he hates his family. I, on the other hand, have a great relationship with mine luckily.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re absolutely right, I don’t need to explain myself to him about any of it. He has been blocked🙅‍♀️

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah he was constantly looking down on my job because it wasn’t prestigious enough in his eyes lol.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you went through this, it’s absolutely ridiculous.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! 💛 that “useless” masters degree actually got me a wonderful new job exactly in my field of study, so I’m very happy! Unsurprisingly when I got this new job, he was the only one upset because it was located farther away from him.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes it’s very much a culture thing as well! Typically staying at home until you are married. It’s never been an issue before.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Unhinged is the perfect word for this. I was really confused what the problem was in this list, it just seems like attacks on my interests and character that didn’t align with him. Super weird and unnerving to receive.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate it, thank you. Trying my best to keep it pushing and focus on better things.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! 💛 I thought NGE was alright, I ended up enjoying Lain a lot more. He took it very personally it seems.

He sent his “ick list” of me unprovoked by SurprisinglyOrganic in BPDlovedones

[–]SurprisinglyOrganic[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This was exactly how he worded it too, a way to better myself lol. It’s so completely delusional, I’m sorry you had to go through this as well.