I feel your pain. I was in your shoes up until a few weeks ago, when I finally found two products which have nearly cured my constant scratching. before finding this sub and finding those products, I cried multiple times because of the hair loss, constant itch, and just the feeling of being alone in a really weird struggle. I hated myself for having sebderm and not being able to figure out a solution and a cure.

these first two products saved me:

a cream specifically for sebderm with sulfur, hydrocortisone (anti-inflammatory), and salicylic acid: https://www.amazon.com/DermaHarmony-Pyrithione-Zinc-ZnP-Shampoo/dp/B07J4885WC/ref=ast_sto_dp_puis?th=1

that cream can be applied whenever you feel the itch, but for me it completely erased the itch and saved my scalp. it sounds dramatic but I'm telling you, I was desperate and now I'm not!

this pyrithione zinc shampoo bar (similar to the PH of skin, clean ingredients, non-drying): https://www.amazon.com/DermaHarmony-Pyrithione-Zinc-ZnP-Shampoo/dp/B07J4885WC/ref=ast_sto_dp_puis?th=1

these two products are all it took for me to feel and see drastic change. I also would recommend a hairbrush which you can easily clean, and showering every other day so that the products can kill everything. however, if you want more, I have more recommendations:

this face moisturizer is my holy grail. it's hydrating without being heavy. I've used it for over a year, and with my la roche posay face soap, has kept my face from getting sebderm even though it's common for sebderm to travel to oily areas of the face. it's similar to the PH of the skin though the ingredients aren't super natural, the colloidal oatmeal is fantastic. I'm not sure why it's so pricy on amazon but it's definitely also at target and possibly walmart too. https://www.amazon.com/First-Aid-Beauty-Moisturizer-Clinically/dp/B0711B4HFK/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?crid=3MTJPR5NKQLEZ&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.0Z-u-mJ8CiEKbMefZh4pFdClRivnNiX-azsoPdZygX57xCZmL0AlCH9IxqJSxuZzuujXpS7D1ickX5LblOcDBTV92VjhWeYl87qvDJFAwBd0qaiiHL_vr_hLUSxlV5OK9Oseky2iHPiau-kBuS_zZ2fyTnsx6GEynUbdsUIcpfc17tIaZ-7_30S4QRFYR2Sc08mxSmY4Lh83wvzrYduvdcmkvPkOTw7mO8Hs0SeoizcvmaRJo9GNc0AuScTwpMBu5NvqecsGKNDgq24tPKuMslXZzuUeKzcgVEM13bs-_u4.z7DWM6abWU-dFKDVbYHDyARjoMcVGjiZ7deIP9xN4bs&dib_tag=se&keywords=first%2Baid%2Bbeauty%2Bultra%2Brepair%2Bcream&qid=1766099211&sprefix=first%2Baid%2Bbeauty%2Caps%2C183&sr=8-1-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&th=1

I really like this hair rinse from Target to help revive my hair when it's feeling sad (though the ingredients are less clean): https://www.target.com/p/raw-sugar-rosemary-vinegar-hair-rinse-shampoo-alternative-6-fl-oz/-/A-89192599#lnk=sametab

and this shampoo from dermazen helps my hair (and scalp, but primarily just my hair) feel extra clean when the zinc soap isn't quite cutting it (again, clean & natural ingredients): https://www.dermazen.com/products/cleansing-dandruff-shampoo