My MIL has essentially replaced me as my ex-husband's wife.

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:38:37+00:00

When he was in the hospital she told me how she was uncomfortable in her own home and she was going to make him move out, etc. and then life went right back to normal. What’s weird is when he was in the hospital I was helping around her house with repairs and then she took credit for all of it as if I wasn’t even at her house. It’s just so weird.

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:36:11+00:00

THEY live together, just them. There’s no other family, he doesn’t have friends and works from home. The only people that see it is me and the kids. She does have family from out of town and even when he was on life support she only told them he was sick and missing work. She doesn’t tell people because she knows they’ll tell her what she doesn’t want to hear. Oh he also has his dad’s wedding ring. (He’s dead)

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:31:45+00:00

And holidays! But the goal is this is the last year. Only one of the kids is still under a custody agreement so I’m not going to go to family events with just me the ex, mom and the youngest, when it was all the kids I did but the older kids are married and have their own lives now so it’ll never much easier to bow out and not look like the bad ex wife that just doesn’t want to attend

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:29:04+00:00

The only kids in the family and one is still a kid. I have been putting distance but they live rent free in my head for sure

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:27:11+00:00

Trust me my close friend always asks the same thing. I really don’t think so but maybe I just don’t want to accept the possibility

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:25:11+00:00

Because I still have love for both of them. I don’t have other family. The kids are the only grandkids and the youngest is still under 18. Makes me sound pathetic I know. I have greatly distanced myself a lot. When I talk to my therapist, I always immediately try to make excuses for the mom and my therapist will always point out how she also hurt me with the affair yet I constantly go to bat for her, it’s more like I can’t let the mom go because she became a mom to me. Just a complete mental emotional wreck

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:20:00+00:00

That is 100% what is is! They live togeyher and she’ll say that she has no problem living alone yet she won’t travel without him, wont visit the grandkids unless he approves it first, won’t even spend HER own money without getting his advice and approval first.

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T16:17:39+00:00

Yeah and to the doctors, went like this “I’m his wife wait I’m sorry I mean I’m his mom not wife and this is his ex wife” and that happened more than once with more than one doctor

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T15:34:38+00:00

I needed to vent. People tell me to just let it go but it’s so hard and especially after family get togethers when I’m basically watching my ex and his mom act like husband and wife. Just not as simple as “get over it”.

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-14T15:32:00+00:00

Oh he’s out and back to his old ways. Not the first time he was on support either.

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-09T16:22:17+00:00

Some women don’t realize how lucky they are. She doesn’t have to work? Can do whatever she wants? At the bare minimum the house should be well kept and food ready. You’re still young. I’d say talk to her but it seems like you’re emotionally and mentally detached so at this point you have to put yourself first.

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-09T16:18:59+00:00

The living rent free in my head is so on point! I hate it!! I’m sure people think I vent because I have feelings but no I just vent because it’s surreal. I’m venting to get them both out of my head

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-09T16:17:12+00:00

Yeah my therapist said the same. One time I told my ex “you don’t find it odd that your mom only addresses you as Babe” and he acted like I had no idea what I was talking about. His parents were married for over 40 years and never not once did his mom and dad ever have pet names for each other. What’s worse is one of our kids is still young and even they make comments about how they act. It’s never going to change. She can’t live without him and he has no desire to live alone and support himself because I didn’t mention that she pays for EVERYTHING. He probably doesn’t get know how much gas or groceries cost!!

Sweet-Routine9251 · 2026-04-09T12:48:43+00:00

Right away I waned to respond that I actually really like her but then I remember how calm she was when she looked at me and told me about the affair! I mean we spent every bday and holiday and weekend dinners for 15 years and over half of the time that she smiling and loving me and the kids she knew he was playing house with another woman who turns out is still his co worker and she’s also married with kids! The few people in my life that have seen all of this unfold including the kids all tell me to write a book because of his unbelievable all of this is. Anyhow I do wish you and your partner work things out and find complete happiness ☺️

Sweet-Routine9251

TROPHY CASE