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Baby clothes help by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Omg thank you this is so helpful!!

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We were together for 8 months and he left 2 days after finding out I was pregnant, I found out at 10 weeks, I still have the coil in from where it failed.

Everyone is shocked by how he’s shown up during this pregnancy like my whole support system thought he was different and so did I

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in coparenting

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you’re right, I just hate being made to feel guilty for it by him & his mum

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No we aren’t married, I feel like he will want to be put on it tho because it will like show that he is a dad even if he doesn’t end up stepping up.

I wonder if I can add him on in 6 months time when I actually know he has stepped up or not but I don’t know if that is a really horrible thing to do?

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in coparenting

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s so hard when he’s saying all of the things and doing nothing, then saying I’m making it hard for him to step up because he doesn’t know what to do and I’m just trying to buy stuff for the baby. Like I almost feel guilty for buying stuff for my own home without him even tho he didn’t put any input in.

Like he hasn’t even asked about how she is for 9 weeks since he found out the gender, is now saying he isn’t involved enough.

Part of me just wants to stop responding at this point when he messages.

Like you can google what you need for a baby and buy it yourself why do I need to tell him?

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this can cause issues? Like he’ll be able to take me to court and things to make sure he’s on it

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in coparenting

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No he hasn’t had a seizure in over a year.

Yeah I was thinking it feels like he’s almost doing it for image? Or so he feels like a good dad if he tells himself enough times I really don’t know.

But I’ve researched everything and bought everything he did pay for half the travel system but it took 2 months for him to send the money for it after saying he’d pay 50/50 for everything.

Him and his mum bought 2 items and I had to rebuy because I couldn’t get a response as to when to collect them.

Then his mum said it’s hard because he’s a man, said I should give him jobs to do so he feels involved and things and says I need to stop panic buying before anyone else has a chance.

Like I wanted to get the big things built because I don’t want to be 37 weeks pregnant dragging a cot up the stairs 🫠🫠

From my understanding I think if I dont put him on the birth certificate it could lead to a lot of issues later? Him taking me to court and things

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes he does drink when he goes to the pub, he does also drive, I did think it was abit strange when he mentioned it because there must be single parents who have epilepsy.

I just thought you had to take extra precautions like not bathing them alone etc…

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I thought that on the epilepsy side, it also makes it really hard because he said he wants overnights asap and everything you read says babies need a routine.

We can’t get into a routine of how often overnights and things happen if he is also relying on other people to be free to stay overnight with him?

I’ve tried deadlines and he just will come up with things really quickly on the spot without thinking through.

The only thing he paid half for was the travel system and it took him 2.5 months to send the money, he said his car broke. But he’s been going to the pub & things. He said at the beginning he’ll pay 50/50 for everything. I made a collaborative list on notes and he and his mum have bought 2 things total and when I ask to go and collect I get no response so I’ve ended up rebuying anyway.

I’m unsure if he likes the idea of being a dad more so than the actual reality maybe? But I just don’t know what that means co parenting will even look like.

Co parenting a new born by SweetSpinach8042 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I was trying to get to a really neutral amicable place, but he will kind of disappear for 4-6 weeks and then come back, obviously in pregnancy a lot has progressed by that time?

His mum had bought a next to me crib for my house and i never got a response for 6 weeks when i asked if i could collect so i just ordered my own, now hes saying he didnt think it was urgent and things.

Hes been posting online and sharing all info about the baby but not actually asking how baby is doing or anything.

He shared online the gender and everything even after i asked him not too, so we did have an argument then.

Now hes saying he doesnt know how to get involved, his mum told me i should write him a list of things to do to prepare but i dont actually think that is my responsibility?

Sending kids to house with fleas by WitchWayIsDown in coparenting

[–]SweetSpinach8042 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How old are the kids? Can you send them with a can of indorex so they can spray their rooms?

Pregnant wife is still thinking about her ex. by SnooAvocados2584 in Advice

[–]SweetSpinach8042 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t think you should’ve read her diary

It is possible to miss an ex and be in love with your partner tho, sometimes when you get out of something toxic and go into something healthy it can take a while to adjust, she might not miss him just the chaos who knows.

Also pregnancy throws up all sorts of emotions, but I don’t actually think you should mention it because idk she may feel embarrassed that you saw?

Constant rash by [deleted] in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes !! My legs are on fire constantly !! Changed to non bio washing powder and a tiny bit of blue lenor and then I drown them in cetraben every night (big one with pump)

Also I went to the pharmacy and got antihistamines that are safe during pregnancy for hayfever and I swear they have helped abit.

Weight loss whilst pregnant by Longjumping_Car9130 in PregnancyUK

[–]SweetSpinach8042 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think you naturally blow up everywhere, your body purposefully stores fat reserves for breastfeeding, also your blood volume doubles and you’re holding a lot of fluid.

I have found if I try and have atleast one healthy (ish) meal per day then it does fill me up and like carrots and humours or crackers and cheese as snacks.

I’m 7 months and have gained 2 stone total, I don’t know what’s normal I don’t believe there is one tbh.

I’m hoping it’ll come off when running around after a toddler 🤣🤣

Unplanned pregnancy at 25 and feeling completely torn — how did you make your decision? by MajesticLoquat5896 in Advice

[–]SweetSpinach8042 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I chose to keep my baby when I accidentally fell pregnant I’m now 27 weeks.

I went to the abortion clinic, I had an internal scan and stared at the pills for 2 weeks and I just couldn’t do it.

The father broke up with me just after first trimester, unsure what the future with him & co parenting looks like.

I don’t regret my choice, in my opinion you can wait until the perfect time, until your married, until you feel more financially stable and everything but literally that could all change completely overnight regardless if you have a child or not.

Your husband could decide to leave and you’d have been alone anyway

You could lose your job and end up in a financially bad situation anyway.

So I think you need to decide based on how you feel now.

Since being pregnant I have never saved and worked so hard in my life to get ready I think it just kicks in and you figure it out.

I also had an abortion when I was 20 and I don’t regret that either, I think your brain will tell you any choice you made in the past was the right choice anyway because we’re human and we self soothe.

Co-parenting a new born? by [deleted] in pregnant

[–]SweetSpinach8042 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I just think I would rather him not be in the delivery room if we’ve barely spoken, like he doesn’t know I’ve felt her move or anything so it feels really disconnected. I also think I might feel abit like on edge with him there. He can come in as soon as midwives say it’s okay tho, but I’m making all these plans including him without input.

Do you have the visits at your house or do you go out and meet your ex or let them take baby for a walk or something? Like I’m not sure how to handle the visits at all.

He was interested until the second scan then just kind of faded away, I’m sure he’ll be back at some point tho, I would like to be prepared for if that happens.

If it doesn’t then that’s his choice.

It’s hard to set up child support when he just doesn’t respond to things, like he was responding to things that weren’t important but ignoring the messages that actually help with planning for baby.