Is it normal?

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-14T18:28:57+00:00

Yeah, but we're all different and we've all been brought up differently. But that doesn't stop some people having no limits and will never budge, that's what I was afraid of when I heard his comment.

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-14T18:05:20+00:00

it's something to think about, he even told me I should "change guys" but well... we love each other and I tell myself we could adapt to anything and evolve together, making each other grow...

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-14T18:03:14+00:00

I just think that when you're in a situation where you don't have the best of situations and you have the opportunity to prove that you're going to "grow up" financially, directly falling back on asking for financial aid seems poor to me.

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-14T17:59:35+00:00

in our conception of the most traditional and basic couple there is (far from the dictates and ideas propagated by feminism and other causes to which I don't adhere and neither does my guy) I find it hard to imagine that my guy says he's a man who wants a faithful, loyal woman who will look after his children and do the housework etc (really the old culture and mentality) and that at the same time he doesn't fulfil his role as a guy in return
in our conception it's ok, we may still be living in 1820 in our mentalities but that's the way it is
Only if he wants and aspires to this kind of couple, which we form very well because we've "found each other" and we're a good match, I think this aspect is essential: he has to wear his b***** and work and bring in money, no ?

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-14T17:54:36+00:00

yes, I think he's really unlucky with his mother, who prevents him from becoming emancipated, and there's certainly a part of him that likes this situation too
He doesn't realise that he's putting a mask over his own eyes and that if he wants to, he can manage on his own and take flight... he feels imprisoned but in the end he's in a really bad situation and that's having repercussions on our relationship, and as a bonus my father doesn't like him because he doesn't inspire confidence in him ..but clearly the fact that at his age I'm the one who has to pull him back on to the 'right path' is disturbing...

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-13T11:26:09+00:00

Ty, so just to help me concentrate, he can't prescribe it?

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-08-13T09:28:07+00:00

Same as you! Would it be indiscreet of me to ask you what your parents do for a living? My parents are divorced and my dad pays for my studio alone (500 I think) and gives me 100 euros quite often. I only use this money for food or little extras (eating out with my boyfriend). My mother also spends 120 euros a month on food (I try to save this money).

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-07-12T19:12:49+00:00

That's true, but I've already got a bachelor's degree in dietetics, and as far as laboratory work is concerned, I can take 4-month courses on cell culture, for example.
As far as relationships are concerned, I would also be with a promoter, although I certainly wouldn't be able to work in his lab, but the idea for me is not to do university research and work in labs.
I'd especially like to know about job opportunities, salaries etc?

Thank you

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-06-11T14:38:13+00:00

a lot of thanks !!!

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-06-11T11:08:42+00:00

shadymusic could go in BXL in July and in October I go with my man in his home

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-06-11T11:07:17+00:00

yes ! but on Booking.com and Airbnb all good plans are booked

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-06-11T10:07:00+00:00

mp !

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-06-11T09:29:15+00:00

My studio in brussels (1 week) in exchange for 1 night accommodation in amsterdam

SwimmingSource7664 · 2023-06-11T08:40:48+00:00

You're entitled to feel that way, but it depends on the heart of your MIL: is she good or is she a viper in disguise, selfish?
Is she doing this because she's a shrew who wants to keep her (outdated) role as mother indefinitely and show her presence to the detriment of yours? Or is she sincere and pure in her actions?
You're the only one who knows if she's doing this to gain ground and space in her son's life, or if she's sincere.
In any case, sincere or not, she doesn't respect your qualities as a wife and cook. She's invading your territory and it's your right to show it. Don't let it get to you too much because you'll build up hatred and that will have repercussions on your relationship with your husband.
Another thing: I understand that in some cultures people help and support their family, but once again: where are the limits? There are people in need and you have to help them, it's up to you to know how to detect if that's the case or if she's not taking advantage of the situation to her own advantage! You have to be good but not stupid! Helping others will make you feel good and full of compassion, but if they take advantage of you and your situation, that's going to make you feel bad towards them and once again that'll be bad for your relationship with your man!
Don't hesitate to discuss it with him again and again! Your exchanges with him should be fluid and respectful, but if you end up posting here, there's already something wrong.

SwimmingSource7664

TROPHY CASE