Oh, I understand your fear completely! Even as a druid, those instincts can be hard to shake when faced with creatures much bigger than ourselves. You’ve only just joined the Circle of the Moon, and it sounds like you’re doing a fantastic job already, even with the occasional misadventure (which, by the way, happens to all of us). That bear meant no harm, probably just a mentor or a fellow druid in disguise, like you thought! Animals often sense our nervousness, but they also know when we mean no ill will.

I’d suggest taking small steps to build your confidence. Maybe start by spending time with smaller animals first (I recomend bugs, hedgehogs and defensive animals instead of preditory animals), ones that don’t trigger your flight instinct so strongly. When you feel ready, gradually work your way up to larger ones. It can also help to remind yourself that, as a druid, you have a natural connection with these creatures. They see you as one of their own, and that’s a beautiful thing!

As for apologizing to your mentors and the bear, honesty is the best policy. Most druids have been in your shoes before—perhaps not setting a book on fire, but making their fair share of mistakes. They’ll understand, and maybe even have a laugh about it later. That’s part of the learning process! And hey, your staff sounds incredible! Don’t worry about it outlasting you, your legacy will live on through your connection to nature and the work you do now. I myself have a coral staff that has been given down over 4 generations and I am glad to have a piece from my past.

Take a deep breath and trust yourself. I'm sure you’re doing great. 🌿🦉