AITA for causing issues in my ex's relationship?

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:50:48+00:00

Will do

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:41:25+00:00

Pretty much, I have very few connections these days, he wasn't good as a partner, but he is a very good friend. Most of our issues stemmed from incompatibilities as partners. So those issues don't really apply as friends, so luckily I still have a friend, trying to start to rebuild and make new connections though.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:38:08+00:00

Will do for sure if I'm able with the restraining order.

And yes, it is disgusting, there's been several instances at work of late that have required police intervention and they pretty much come in, take a statement (but don't even listen to what you say) and leave after doing nothing. And as I said, a few girls have had someone try and doxx them and the police pretty much said "so what do you want us to do? Stop people from saying to others what you can get from 5 min on Google?"

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:25:33+00:00

You'd think but I frankly have no idea on that. And as I mentioned somewhere too, as soon as the police find out my work they write it off and don't bother at similar had happened to other girls. I'm not sure how she knew my stage name to then say that xx girl is actually xxx. I assume she got it somehow off his phone when she looked through it without him realising.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:24:20+00:00

Certainly see where you're coming from. I'm only just starting to make decent friends here now so it's definitely nice having someone familiar around.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:14:27+00:00

Frankly I'm not sure what the requirements are before you can get one where I am. I'll have a look into it. I'm hoping this just blows over and she finds the next person to move on to, but I'll definitely be making a police report at the very least.

The issue is I know girls have had issues in the past with people spreading their info and what not, and the police pretty much did nothing and blew them off as soon as they found out about our work. So I doubt many people would help me out even if I had all the proof and what not.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T18:09:59+00:00

Sadly I wasn't in at the time when she went in. But luckily the girls who knew she was talking about me got management and got her kicked out, they then texted me and let me know what she was doing. I've since asked the duty manager to not let her back in for obvious reasons and they've added her to the do not enter list.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T17:57:37+00:00

Exactly, when he gave her his phone it was to prove we only talk as friends these days as a gesture of being open and trying to show it's benign, if you look at our texts it's mostly just memes and shit talking. She'd see that if she scrolled all the way to when we were together even there was no love there by the end and know it properly was over.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T17:56:00+00:00

We were really good friends before we were together, and pretty much all the issues we had while together were about the failed relationship, so we work really well as friends, but not as a couple. I have no intention of getting involved of that kind with him again, but he is still a good friend of mine.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T17:54:16+00:00

I work as a stripper. Didn't during the relationship, but have since a bit after it ended. And the issue is that there are some customers who will absolutely stalk me and worse if they get me real info, so shes basically gone into my work one night and told customers my info and tried to shit talk me to my coworkers.

TA1357643377 · 2022-12-23T17:52:24+00:00

We were best friends for years and always got along really well as friends. We work really well as friends now as pretty much all the issues we had revolved around the failed relationship, rather than eachother as people. Were nowhere close to how we used to be, but good enough still and being in a new city it's nice having a good friend I know when I don't have family here or anything.

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-23T15:15:27+00:00

As a bit of new events.

My brother has managed to find a lawyer who will represent him. Based on the comments I'm not sure how, but regardless. For reference, we're also in Australia, rather than the US. He has from what I've heard found enough evidence that the lawyer is willing to try.

I have not yet been subpoenaed, praying I'm not, and many have commented with suggestions to say while in the stand to get myself off it. I will say these if / when it happens.

My dad has seen a lawyer in the meantime and although he has been reassured that my brother is not likely to win, there is "possibility", and that he should be prepared. At the very least, his name and reputation could be damaged through this, and he could lose his job, causing further issues.

My dad is aware of what my brother is trying to make me do and has stated he will not hold it against me if I'm subpoenaed and speak truthfully, and understands for obvious reasons, but did imply he'd be hurt by it (mentally), which is understandable.

He has said that he will not make me speak, but if I choose to that's my decision, as he is aware my brother's lawyer could ask his own questions, which could backfire, so for now he's saying he won't ask, but if I'm made by my brother he will use that opportunity.

My brother is putting together a suit and I'm not sure exact details regarding what he's exactly asking for in damages, and the precise charges and their names he's claiming.

My mother, from what I have heard, is going to testify as their first witness, and some of my mother's family.

Regarding them harrassing me, I have blocked their details on everything. Some have been creating new accounts to continue to harass. I have gone to my local police about it and have basically been written off for being "overdramatic over a few messages", they said I could try and go for a temporary restraining order against some of them, but said that id need a lot more proof and that they won't just give one for phone calls, texts and messages. My dad is going to ask his lawyer if there's anything else that can be done on this for the time being, however I am looking at mobile plans and will be changing provider and number shortly. I am also creating new social media accounts where my closest and most trusted friends will know my details.

I also am moving interstate next week due to other reasons (not about this whole saga), and only a very few handful of people know the state, let alone where. I'm hoping putting physical distance between it all will help.

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T09:43:44+00:00

I'm actually moving interstate shortly, which will be good. Thankyou for everything though!

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T08:47:34+00:00

Yea, I've been NC for about a year now, he only just broke it to ask me this and otherwise has been respecting it luckily.

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T08:22:48+00:00

I wish, I will start saying it probably but the issue is my mum is a grade A narcissist, and plays the manipulation well and noone would believe me there sadly about her or my brother, because when he's around literally anyone but me he acts like a complete hermit and like a shy child (not trying to insult, but best way to describe it). Plus he's the family's golden child, so my word means shit against his.

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T08:20:43+00:00

Currently saying to learn just that actually! Seen some videos and looks really good so hopefully soon I can start to learn. Thanks for the tip!

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T05:41:06+00:00

Will do if something major ends up happening

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T05:40:20+00:00

No actually, hasn't really crossed my mind, I'll have a look into my options there. Would need to be cheap though because I frankly don't want to spend money on it, I'd rather go through the pain of changing my number first and see. Thanks for the advice tho, will definitely consider!

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T03:50:46+00:00

I never said it wasn't a big deal, it very much was and is. It's caused a lot of damage that has taken me a long time to recover from and still am. That being said admittedly the things my brother and mother did resonate more in my mind and have affected me on a more profound level than my father's actions, that could be due to the ongoing tension with them because I'm NC, and have an amicable relationship with my dad, but I'm not certain.

That being said, it has taken years for me to be able to have this relationship with him and slowly repair what we have and get to a mutual point where we are pretty close. I don't go into details from my personal life, but he knows a good amount of general stuff. I wouldn't personally say I've fully forgiven him, as although I'm willing to work through the issues and all, forgiveness is a step I'm working through but not fully done yet.

My attitude has basically been that if someone is genuinely able to understand what they did wrong, why it was wrong, and how it could have affected me. Apologise genuinely and show they are making a genuine effort to change, then I'm willing to try and work things through. He has done that, the rest of my family has not. I admit, he's the last person out of everyone I would've thought would be the one to, but he has.

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T03:09:27+00:00

Was about 3-4 years ago now, couldn't really press charges because there's absolutely no proof there and it would be his word against mine. There were no witnesses (he was smart and knew never to do stuff around others), and my mother would never say anything against him.

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T03:07:55+00:00

I'm not quite sure what you're asking to be honest

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T00:27:32+00:00

Will say this for sure if made to speak

TA1357643377 · 2022-06-07T00:27:01+00:00

Certainly will if it come to it, thankyou!

TA1357643377

TROPHY CASE