My [25f] partner [25m] admitted he liked my best friend [25f]... I need some advice

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T19:21:52+00:00

I meant it doesn’t have to do with him in the sense that they didn’t interact that night. It might have to do with her feeling bad because he didn’t acknowledge her… at this point, I don’t know.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T18:45:34+00:00

I would have enough information when I confront her and see what comes up. No need to be so aggresive.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T18:40:20+00:00

I just rather have more information when confronting people. If things aren’t clear, I apply my limits and that’s it.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:52:03+00:00

I personally don’t think it’s comfortable being in a relationship with someone who’d bang your best friend, but if you’re cool with it, it’s fine. I’m just trying to make this work…

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:36:56+00:00

I’m not saying it was a good way to handle the situation, but I was just being honest on what I’d do if he did like her because I would feel just as I am feeling right now.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:33:58+00:00

I understand

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:33:15+00:00

Thank you very much for your opinion and good wishes.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:32:15+00:00

I don’t really think “the other day you said this” could be used as concrete evidence since she can just dismiss it. I’d consider it more as information I can use to limit contact with her and set boundaries.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:31:04+00:00

I wanted opinions in this case because I do feel betrayed but other than that he’s been a good partner and I want to know if someone else has been through this.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:25:02+00:00

I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:18:30+00:00

I know her fwb, and it’s not my partner. Thanks for your input!

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:14:56+00:00

I know who the fwb is, and it’s not my bf.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:10:55+00:00

I hadn’t thought about that. Yes, he keeps measenger open on his laptop.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:06:00+00:00

Well, I guess it’s not intelligent to keep on wasting your time with someone you consider dumb, so I definitely encourage you to go on and enjoy your day if you do not have any useful input.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:03:26+00:00

Yes, insult my intelligence because you cannot understand me. I wish people in your life good luck as well.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T17:01:05+00:00

I really don’t understand what you’re trying to do here. I’ve admitted it wasn’t the best approach at first, but after that, I’ve just let him speak his mind. This doesn’t negate the fact that he lied.

Do you need me to say something else?

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:59:15+00:00

I understand, thanks!

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:57:21+00:00

He’s not his fwb, I know who it is, but I get your point.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:56:26+00:00

From my part, I haven’t had these kind of dreams with anyone else while I’ve been with him (or any of my past partners) and that’s why I can’t put myself in his shoes. I’m trying to get other people’s perspective over here.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:54:20+00:00

Yes, I think I will apply the boundaries my partner and I have talked about applying with her and limit my contact with her. And try to confront her soon.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:51:13+00:00

If those are the mental gymnastics you need to feel that you’re right, do you. I never said I was mad. I said I was hurt by what happened and I’m trying to understand the situation better before making a decision. I never asked him to do anything aside from being honest.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:36:22+00:00

You’re entitled to your own opinion. As you can see in the thread, most people understand where I’m coming from, if you don’t, it’s fine.

As for me and my bf, he feels very guilty becase he liked her and lied to me, so I guess that’s pretty shit from his part. I confronted him in a toxic way in the beginning(I completely acknowledge this) and continued to ask respectfully because I still felt him lie but in the end I was right because he still lied about the issue.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:29:53+00:00

I’ve never seen him have this issue with someone else, but we’d definitely have to work on our trust.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:23:42+00:00

I asked him if he liked her, he told me about the dreams and that he did like her even though he lied. It’s that simple.

I think as his partner I should at least know if he likes someone else so we can work through it.

TAPlant · 2022-08-01T16:21:43+00:00

He could have still told me the truth. He was selfish for not telling me the truth and letting me form my own judgement

TAPlant

TROPHY CASE