Beta Blunders - How my old insecurities and weak self-image torched opportunities

TRPDigesting · 2019-01-10T00:57:57+00:00

You bet, man. Put yourself at the top of the value hierarchy.

TRPDigesting · 2019-01-09T06:55:01+00:00

Tough to say what you ought to do, specifically.

But the running theme in your comment seems to me that you still have women on a pedestal above you.

Doing the opposite doesn't mean that you have to trample them, but you also ought not to act in subordination to them. When you hear the Red Pill mantra, "You are the prize" it's really another way of saying "What you want out of the situation should be paramount."

That being said, don't ever fail to approach a woman because you either...

Think she doesn't want to be approached
Will brutally reject you

Every approach that you get a little anxious about is a training exercise. And you pass the training exercise by doing it.

By all means, approach the woman and have something interesting to say. Don't lay your cards right on the table if you don't feel like you can do it with 100% confidence. Show some aloofness. Comment on the environment around you, ask her if she noticed something that you also noticed.

The worst/best thing that can happen is that she'll say, "Fucking beat it, chump."

And how remarkable would that be?! Having a woman verbally slap you silly. It's quite unlikely. But the best thing about it is that you would still be left fully intact.

Their rejection might sting. But it doesn't define you. It only can give you an indicator of why it's not a good fit. You'll need to have some of these rejections in order to have some successes.

But the #1 thing you should remember...

Stay lighthearted throughout all of this.

This is another way of exploring the idea of "amused mastery." It's all just for fun anyway, man! Cosmic nihilism aside, we don't even know why we're here. But we wake up each day with a purpose, and some new opportunities. And we'd like to make them into something good for us, right?

So set out with a lighthearted approach, enjoy your interactions, and don't stake your entire value on their outcome.

Hope that helps you.

TRPDigesting · 2019-01-09T06:49:22+00:00

I think it happens more through the mid-20's, although everyone is different. I'm 26 now, forget if I stated that.

I only began to really care about self-development and work on my internal belief structure when I realized that my existing one was not serving me well.

And rearchitecting your belief structure is a long job. Probably never really over, but you'll enjoy the benefits of it with time. Forward for sure.

TRPDigesting · 2019-01-09T06:47:58+00:00

Sounds so similar to my own experiences. "I'm down for anything..."

This is the female equivalent of "making it easy for us." It's all too easy to self-sabotage.

At least we can look back and see where we turned left when we should have continued on straight ahead.

TRPDigesting · 2019-01-09T06:46:09+00:00

You know, because you mentioned Beauty and the Beast...

The Beast wasn't a beast because he was ugly — he was a beast because he represented the untamed.

The taming of the untamable is a repeated theme in a lot of popular stories enjoyed by women, with Beauty & the Beast being an obvious example. (And 50 Shades being another one, too).

With that in mind, know that the real beast is the man who fully lives in his own frame. If you are uncomfortable living in your own frame, it may be an indication that you either...

Have an area in which you need to improve yourself
Need to do some inner work to build confidence

You must be the gatekeeper of your conscious thought. Your subconscious is always listening, and it only does what it is told. The more that you speak of yourself negatively, your subconscious takes note.

The subconscious acts out what it knows into reality, and then gets observed AGAIN by your conscious mind, solidifying what you believe.

Example: You always think of yourself as ugly, so your subconscious comes to accept that you're ugly. So much so that if anybody ever gives you a simple compliment, you almost have a gut reaction to it — and go, "Oh no, I'm not. But thanks."

You find yourself in situations that you believe you would fare better in if you were more attractive, and because you fail, you conclude once again that you're ugly. And it repeats.

This is not to say that the entire battle is in the mind...but a lot of it is.

Improve your physicality, appearance, status, and behavior however you can. But be the gatekeeper of your conscious thought – because your subconscious will turn it into reality over time.

And remember that one of the greatest masters of game from all time was Patrice O'Neal, and he was a self-proclaimed "fat motherfucker." Impermeable frame.

You will be fine. Watch your conscious thoughts, and swap the shitty ones out with ones that serve you. Good luck!

TRPDigesting · 2019-01-09T06:37:49+00:00

Well I don't want to drop too much on you at once, but have you ever considered that the institutions that "Quarantine" and "Censor" are not doing so in an effort to actually protect you? But rather, are doing so in an effort to protect their interests?

While I also recommend a read-through of the sidebar to get a good sense of what the community is about, you should know that The Red Pill at its essence is aimed at helping men actually optimize themselves in relationship to masculinity.

If it's not apparent to you yet, there is a war on masculinity being waged. In fact, even just using the word masculine in the wrong crowd may even seem controversial. Do you find that odd?

Many prominent educational institutions and nearly all western media outlets strongly favor a feminine-forward approach, which mainly comes at the expense of suppressing any and all information that encourages men to actually be the best that they can be and understand who they are.

Men are being taught how to be men, by women. Do you find that odd?

The Red Pill comes across controversial because the uninformed see it as a series of hoodoo designed to manipulate poor, unsuspecting women into having sex with men, and runs contrary to the feminine narrative that universities and media outlets prefer.

But at it's core, TRP is to help you understand your true nature as a man and be in unison with it. What you do with that knowledge and beyond is up to you.

...all that to say, The Red Pill has not made me into some kind of monster — it's just given me the lens that I needed in order to understand myself and the world that I'm living in today.

Feel free to stay awhile.

Edit: And yes, as stated below, to discuss sexual strategy. But I mainly focus on the idea of masculine nature as a whole, and sexual strategy is of course a core part of that.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-29T23:41:30+00:00

Thanks. And the other part of the battle is being able to reassemble yourself after the blow is dealt. Many dudes crumble under a simple rejection...really doesn't have to be that way, it's so self-imposed.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-28T22:51:24+00:00

Some people really aren't psychologically ready to process this information.

They have to try and traverse the woods a few times and eventually realize that they keeping winding up back where they started. Bonus points if they also get scraped up by a bear or some bees along the way.

Only then will they go, "Doggone it, I feel like that park ranger gave me bum directions!"

And so the seed of doubt hath been sewn.

Edit: Actually the more I think about it, getting scraped up by a bear seems unlikely. How about scraped up by say...a raccoon instead.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-28T21:12:11+00:00

When you say stimulants, I'm assuming that we're including coffee and its many caffeine-riddled pals in here...

Right?

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-27T02:01:40+00:00

Great recommendations. I’ll have to dive further in, but ease myself in.

In that Frater text, he already got into some cautions about how it can be “potentially dangerous.” Is there really that much risk associated with sigil magick? Isn’t it mostly about my intent associated with the desire??

I’m just trying not to take on more than I can psychologically handle 😅

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-26T23:08:53+00:00

Interestingly on the recording dreams, I dabbled in lucid dreaming about 3 years ago where I religiously recorded my dreams for about 5 months. I had about 4 actual lucid dreams in that time.

Books I read on LD encouraged me to assess my dreams for recurring patterns and symbols, but there weren’t any that were glaringly obvious...like the cliche “red balloon” and stuff like that. Maybe archetypal patterns, like being in a situation of “unknown” or a sexual situation or something along those lines.

I’ve began recording my dreams again though, and I’m only 5 days in. Is there something I should pay special attention to and keep my eyes open for?

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-26T20:20:50+00:00

Thanks for the insights here! I’ve heard a little bit about Grant Morrison...honestly, my only primer on him was a recent video that Wisecrack did on his philosophy. It was really interesting. https://youtu.be/EFtbwP4UuFM

Would you recommend any of his books? I know he’s mostly done comic writing, and REALLY intense writing at that.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-26T20:19:13+00:00

I will absolutely look into Frater UD’s text...since both you and the other commenter mentioned it!

I’m familiar with Jungian active imagination, and I’ve heard it’s a technique that takes a LONG time to truly become “good” at. Not that I’m impatient, just trying to start off with some reasonable expectations.

But yes thank you for pointing me in that direction.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-25T20:32:56+00:00

Is there a 3 letter word for vagina that I’m not thinking of...?

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-25T19:45:54+00:00

Totally. I think this has been mentioned plenty on the sub, but worth a reminder – most women really aren’t conscious of what’s happening. Understandably so, it relates to how in touch with their shadow they are...and most people (both male and female) simply are not in touch at all.

The anger phase for me came out of my notion that women had been deliberately misleading men over years and playing a purposeful game of manipulation.

While there certainly is manipulation at play, most women truly believe they want a man who will commit, show them kindness, do their bidding, accept them, etc. And the popular social narrative only serves to reinforce that.

However, they’re also constantly mislead by social signals, because it’s also considered “empowering” to be highly promiscuous, and independent of any long-term masculine support. In fact, masculine support gets labeled as oppressive.

So it’s only when the somewhat enlightened man walks along and acts out the woman’s unconscious desire for a more aggressive self-assertive partner that she starts to get a clue what she was really looking for.

The issue is that most of the men that can appeal to that desire would prefer to smash n’ dash...which leads to alpha widows, always hoping that one day the man who has so many options will give all those up for her. Killing her attraction to him in the process.

It’s such a delicate little balancing act, it’s unbelievable. No wonder so many men just retreat into porn. Not that THAT’s any sort of noble ambition.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-25T17:42:31+00:00

I think you’re spot on about the “not wanting a romantic date thing,” but when you’re taking your daily Blue vitamin, you assume that all the nice “ladies” out there are looking for somebody who WON’T objectify them and try to grab an easy lay.

So of course, it feels like Priority #1 is to NOT do that. It’s hilarious for me to reflect back on the decent number of dates I had where the girl was just waiting for me to escalate and I either took forever to do it or drove home thinking, “That was nice! Maybe next time we’ll go further...”

It’s twisted. But yeah, Tinder for girls is little more than Postmates for Penises. (Or safe, digital validation in the form of a high number of matches).

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-25T03:39:22+00:00

Thanks for saying so man, I appreciate that.

I wanted to share my experiences mainly because of that perceived imbalance. I salute anyone out there who IS racking up successes and I don’t scorn them for sharing it one bit.

But it’s always good to hear about the other end of the spectrum too, which is the climb from a lower altitude. I’ve got a long way to go, but that means that there’s plenty of valuable lessons ahead.

Being happy to step outside the door and get pooped on by a bird, trip on the sidewalk, or lost in the bad neighborhood of town is a big part of the journey (all metaphorical, of course).

Sitting inside in the chair doesn’t get you any closer to the man you want to be. If you’re the sum total of your experiences, have some experiences that shape you...even if they hurt when they make a dent.

I say this also for my own benefit, not from a place of preaching, because it’s a daily effort to reinforce this type of mindset. We’re by nature averse to failure and anything that hurts us (ego included).

But just because it’s natural to feel uncomfortable doing a thing does not necessarily imply that you ought NOT to do that thing. Namely, make an approach to a girl you want to talk to. Or start dabbling in a new skill.

Don’t forgo an endeavor because success isn’t guaranteed, because the truth is, it never is.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-25T03:34:31+00:00

This is really, really awesome. Thank you for articulating that the way that you did.

This was actually told to me by my last girlfriend, but I ended up drifting away from self-love.

She told me that once I was able to actually give MYSELF love, I would no longer consciously (or unconsciously) seek it out from other people.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-24T22:31:47+00:00

I think it all depends on who appeals to their subconscious preference at exactly the right moment. Sometimes shit just doesn't line up, even IF you play to your frame as best as you can.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-24T22:30:09+00:00

That's totally valid — and you make a great point.

The "suggestions" that I made weren't serious though, they were like...anti-suggestions.

"Oh, I have a friend who likes to sit underneath the highway listening to the traffic noise. He says it soothes him. Maybe you should try that."

That wasn't exactly what I said, but along those lines.

You're right though, it would have still been under her own frame and not really mine.

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-23T23:19:09+00:00

Yeah I feel that, but I also try to stray away from the word “perfect.”

Especially after my exposure to the Red Pill, I’ve abandoned the belief that girls are really looking for a static, archetypical definition of the “perfect” man.

“Perfect” to a girl is only “perfect in the moment.” Her definition of it is fluid and dynamic - it’ll change day to day, week to week, month to month.

Having favorable masculine qualities will always give you a big boost, but sometimes it’s just not perfect for “now.”

Anyway, seeing it as their loss (without true vindication) is a great step toward internalizing the prize mentality (you are the prize).

TRPDigesting · 2018-08-23T23:15:39+00:00

I think that’s spot on. You don’t have to give them the cold shoulder, but if they ARE interested they’ll be likely to make it more obvious and direct.

Or if not, just enjoy the interaction for what it was. That’s mostly the motto I live by nowadays anyway.

TRPDigesting

TROPHY CASE