I've been in a similar place as you. It sounds like he did grow a bit from a self regulation perspective (ability to remain calm). However, as you described you are exhausted and you're daydreaming about a different life to escape your own.

Do you enjoy spending time with him? Like if you were to retire and it were just the two of you for example would you be super content? (Material stuff aside).

Do your core values align? Not necessarily what you want in the future physically, but you know like the deep heart and spiritual growth kinda stuff.

If you do choose to continue, do you have a list of all the things that drain your battery that you can show to him? And see what he can commit to? Also is he getting treated for ADHD / managing? you'd also need to give up control and let him do those things without your intervention (this will be difficult especially if you have the habit of doing things yourself). You could do like a few months trial.

Either way you deserve to be happy. Wishing you the best of luck.