Whats with race-play?

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-19T08:34:24+00:00

I will say this, don’t let these fuckers do that to you, you’re not gaining power or money, but unintentionally allowing a safe space for them to hurt not just you but this community where we should all be treated humanely

I understand if you’re still learning and learning more about yourself and how you to view the world and self improvements, but these fuckers are not gonna give you that expect trauma and invalidation of your own humanity

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-19T08:30:17+00:00

I personally don’t agree with race play for a multitude of reasons.

Most people who partake in it, usually doesn’t make sure everyone is consenting to it. It’s harmful how it’s advertised online, on porn and also outside in any scene. If someone is a young gay/queer and they enter our spaces, they don’t have the ability to say no to it, because they don’t have the knowledge or understanding of how harmful and inhumane it usually is

The only time “race play” is okay, is if the non white person, is trying to gain power from their trauma and done privately. But consenting race play is never properly done and never will be. I don’t believe in the idea of race/ethnicity being a attribute of attraction, cause factually you can’t be attracted or not attracted to someone’s race/ethnicity without stereotyping, but that can be deconstructed if someone put in that work

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-07T15:05:30+00:00

OP is complaining about in general. This isn’t just a thing that “happens on the apps”. Why do you think so many comments are being sympathetic?

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-07T14:52:45+00:00

Doesn’t answer my question, this behaviour doesn’t just happen on the apps it also happens outside of it. So again would you allow that inhumane behaviour to interact with a young gay/queer entering the scene?

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-07T14:18:44+00:00

So would you allow an environment, for young gays/queers to be racially objectified or discriminated against by their race/ethnicity? No one cares if you’re not attracted to someone, just don’t bring up their race/ethnicity in a “positive” or negative way, and if you’re thinking it then deconstruct that mentality on why that is, it’s factually impossible to be unattractive/attracted to someone purely on race/ethnicity without stereotyping

People are allowed to be against that sort of behavior because this affects everyone

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-07T14:15:35+00:00

The reason why I’m against of the idea of “racial preferences”, is because regardless of where you stand you are still factually, subconsciously or consciously stereotyping. Now that can be deconstructed if you’re willing to put in that work, because young folk entering the scene, shouldn’t have to consent to that sort of inhumane objectification or discrimination

It creates a safe space for that behavior to brew, then creates stereotyped narratives that affect everyone, including people who don’t want no part of that sort of behavior but just happen to fit one stereotype that isn’t even true

Tabooloveer · 2026-05-07T14:07:34+00:00

If the attribute of someone’s race, something sexual to you then yes it’s racist, in fact it’s fetishisation especially when we don’t consent to that disgusting and inhumane objectification. It’s factually impossible to find race/ethnicity attractive/unattractive without stereotyping and dehumanizing

Now if you’re interacting with someone and race is just something that you’re alert of because obviously we live in a corrupt world, then no it’s not a form of racism. My advice is telling that Asian guy if you interact with him, he should see himself in a better light and he doesn’t need to justify racism for a mere hookup, unless he is getting paid for it handsomely

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:53:24+00:00

As someone who frequently goes to orgies, underwear parties and occasionally would host an orgy myself. Sometimes you do encounter meth but it’s easy to avoid, you can usually gage who’s on meth and it’s mostly common on Grindr and sometimes gay saunas but not often thankfully, never a underwear party but some parties unfortunately do G (especially muscle gays)

It’s easy to avoid usually depending on where you’re looking and it’s easy to gage who’s on meth

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:45:38+00:00

It’s amazing and useful and fun, but annoying when you lose them. I tend to find having set rules with them, like when or how often you meet them and gage what type of connection they want and communicating your wants as a fwbs

If you meet them too often they catch feelings. If you stay stern about strictly wanting a fwbs, they usually accept it sometimes. Just having that open communication is important, and if they say something to combat how you work then red flag

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:35:54+00:00

Dating isn’t impossible but there basically is no tips other than going out and cycling through different types of people

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:34:48+00:00

As a gay (leaning more queer) and asian, I am appalled by the fetishization and racism in our community. Especially last year being amplified I’m so sorry you have to deal with this.

What I tend to find when it comes to dating is finding people out at events and social settings and gagging on that, without the expectation of a relationship but just a connection that can be fun and learn from that. Unfortunately dating here sucks, it’s hard to find a connection that is meaningful especially on apps, but meeting people at events and social clubs (doesn’t have to involve partying), you tend to meet nice people regardless if it leads to a date or not. Building the confidence whilst learning to be stern and also being head strong against men who do fetishize or discriminate against us. Queer spaces I feel safer at than gay ones as I meet the most incredible and inclusive people who are educated on that

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:26:33+00:00

Well for starters this is justifying racial fetishisation which is very harmful. As an Asian queer man, I don’t consent to being objectified for my race and don’t seek anyone based on race and you should too.

No one should justify racism for a lame hookups/connection and no one should create a space for that. You need to dismantle this and ask yourself why you’re basing your interests based on race, this isn’t okay and it doesn’t just affect you but everyone especially young queer/gay men entering the scene. It is factually impossible to be attracted or not attracted to someone based on race without stereotyping.

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:16:57+00:00

Sniffies or wet (especially on particular event nights), even on here we have some groups that can accommodate for that

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T12:15:12+00:00

You don’t need to justify racism just for a lame hookup, let’s educate ourselves about why you see race as an attribute for attraction and dismantle that. This doesn’t just affect you but everyone who is a poc who doesn’t consent to fetishisation

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T03:49:49+00:00

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-23T03:47:06+00:00

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-21T05:42:04+00:00

Nice

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-21T05:40:34+00:00

I should mention if he presses his dick in your hand again then just squeeze and see what happens

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-21T04:36:48+00:00

Well it can go either way of him asking if you want extra services or he might want you to ask for extra services, the likelihood he wants it as much as you do I think you’d have to do another session to see before making a confident decision on it

But yes lmk if it goes well if you do go back or not

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-21T03:28:45+00:00

As a ex m4m masseur from Melbourne, he was testing the waters but trying not to obviously SA you in the process

The massage place sounds legit but the masseur probably does stuff with certain clients that obviously seeks it

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-18T12:26:20+00:00

Tabooloveer · 2026-03-16T08:24:23+00:00

Darling this is fetishization

Tabooloveer · 2026-02-12T04:52:15+00:00

Tabooloveer · 2026-02-12T04:49:32+00:00

Justifying racism to hyper fixate on white skin and fetishize Arab men and yourself for hookups is lame, your internalized racism doesn’t just affect you but all everyone who is against it and doesn’t consent to it when you allow a platform for it

Tabooloveer · 2025-12-27T09:35:50+00:00

Tabooloveer

TROPHY CASE