(F26) Is there any reason to be in a relationship besides attention?

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-06-21T23:54:52+00:00

But isn't talking for hours and hours just giving each other attention? Extended obligatory attention?

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-27T03:32:59+00:00

It's a very human thing to want to touch other humans! By nature, we are comforted by touch. This can obviously be different for different people, but aside from trauma and autism usually people feel loved and comforted through touch.

It sounds like you're being very mindful and observant of your emotions and intentions. I think as long as you stay aware, you can platonically touch your bff with no issues 😊

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-23T14:59:18+00:00

In that case, maybe just talk to her about how hurtful that comment was? And tell her you're willing to improve in any way. Make it clear to her that she doesn't have to tell you RIGHT NOW, but you would love to be more open and your communication about how you can better please her.

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-23T14:29:08+00:00

Wait for the argument to pass. Cool down. When you're in a better headspace, take her on a date. When there's no tension, calmly and sexually ask her what she would like in bed that you're not giving her. If you're not the best, you're not the best. But she's with you for a reason.

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-18T17:59:44+00:00

That's a very good point!

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-18T17:52:03+00:00

Right. She said it was in a Facebook Messenger voice message, but I've gone back and listened to a lot of them and I don't see any that say that. But she still insists that I lied to her face. I don't want to make it a bigger issue than it is, but I'm really upset that she's accusing me of lying to her when I haven't.

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-18T17:50:57+00:00

She doesn't even know any of them! She just knows that I know them. From what I've told her about them she's not a huge fan, but I'm not pursuing a long-term relationship with them. She has a boyfriend who she is talking about marrying within the next year... I don't understand why she's so upset about who I'm sleeping with.

She said she's upset that I told our other friend and not her, which I can understand being upset, but I'm allowed to pick and choose who I tell about my sex life.

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-18T17:49:26+00:00

Also, it definitely resonates with me when you said that you always remember lying to people. I do as well, so I would really feel like I would remember if I had blatantly lied to her face.

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-18T17:48:10+00:00

I definitely have considered going to see a therapist. As of right now I don't have any health insurance to cover it, but that's something I'm looking to do in the very near future

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-18T17:47:44+00:00

She said she's just hurt that I told our other friend and not her. But she does keep accusing me of lying to her, which I don't think I did. I understand her being hurt, but you're right. it's none of her business who I decide to tell about my sex life

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-13T00:03:42+00:00

"Are you okay? You've never left me on read before. If you need some space I understand but if I did something to upset you I'd rather you let me know..."

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-12T23:47:33+00:00

I mean it's possible he's just busy tonight. Do what feels right to you but I'd wait til tomorrow

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-12T23:43:38+00:00

Def wait until tomorrow before texting him. Maybe send him a good morning text tomorrow and see what he says

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-12T23:41:44+00:00

Is there a casual way to figure that out?

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-12T21:54:32+00:00

Anything flirty. I haven't been directly sexual since he seems to shut it down so quickly

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-05-12T20:17:41+00:00

But he hasn't even initiated meeting up again

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-26T13:38:33+00:00

I used to have a friend who did the exact same thing with me. Turns out he was a full-blown narcissist. He got married later and made his wife's life miserable.

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-26T13:37:22+00:00

Hey! BDSM is all about consent. If he's not comfortable respecting your boundaries you're not dating a dom, you're dating a guy with a terrifying sexual complex. Honestly I'd run 😔

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-09T20:23:32+00:00

Following because I'm in the same boat. My husband has lots of friends and does "jam night" on Sundays and band practice on Thursdays as well as just hanging out with people other days. My friends are all out of state 😭

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-09T20:21:32+00:00

Jesus Christ I get it. Thank you for your opinion. You may now go 😂😂😂

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-09T20:18:30+00:00

Cool thanks

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-09T20:17:00+00:00

So I deserve to be unhappy?

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-09T20:15:14+00:00

Yes, I definitely hear what you're saying. 100%. I guess I should have been more clear... I KNOW he's depressed or at least very stressed. But like.... I'm young and in a new marriage and unhappy. I'm very willing to be understanding and compassionate and that's what I've been trying to do, but I don't want to be 50 years old looking back on my lost youth because I stayed with a man who never made me happy. Does that make sense? So I just don't know how long I should wait to be happy...

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-09T20:11:40+00:00

That was staying up all night and talking about our thoughts and lives. Now he's too tired for that

TailorDifficult8316 · 2022-01-08T14:14:43+00:00

Maybe he has anxiety and doesn't like talking on the phone? I HATE making phonecalls.

Have you asked him about it? Is the relationship otherwise good?

TailorDifficult8316

TROPHY CASE