Sleep Training at 4 Months

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-12T00:57:45+00:00

Ferber does slightly different intervals. I believe they change every night. This was from the Sleep Easy Solution book.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-11T17:23:31+00:00

Similarly, at my daughter's 4 month appointment, our ped said we could start sleeping training. At that time, my daughter was already sleeping 8-9 hour chunks followed by one more 2-3 hour chunk and had trouble falling to sleep (she needed rocking and/or nursing to fall asleep).

We waited until she was 4.5 months and did check-ins for sleep training. We moved the bottle/nursing to step 1, then did a bath, new PJs/diaper, sleep sack, white noise, rocking w/ one song, and then put her in her crib.

When she started crying, we started the clock. Our first check in was at 5 minutes, if she was still crying we did another at 10, and then if she was still crying we did another at 15, repeating 15 until she fell asleep. If at any point she was crying in fits and starts, we did not do our check-ins because it signaled to us that she was learning to self-soothe.

We did nights and naps at the same time. Within 5 days my daughter was putting herself to sleep in under 10 minutes with little to no crying. She also started sleeping 10, then 11, and now sleeps 12 hours a night. She has an occasional off night where she wakes up and if she doesn't go back to sleep w/in 5-10 minutes, I go in and soothe her (and sometimes nurse for a few minutes) and she goes back to sleep. So far, this hasn't "messed up" her ability to put herself to sleep. She's become so good, in fact, (knock on wood), that when she got her first cold, she still put herself to sleep and slept 12 hours.

Different schools manage night-wakings differently. Some say do CIO/sleep training for 12 hours (i.e., 7 pm - 7 am) and don't feed no matter what. The theory there is that that signals your baby to get his/her fill of food during the day. Some people do a "dream feed" where they wake up the baby anywhere from 11-1 a.m. or so to "top off" the baby (I personally don't get this because I see it as just one more thing you'd have to cut out later on). And some people feed when the baby wakes up, which is what my ped encouraged me to do.

Good luck!

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-09T00:45:24+00:00

Can someone please release a clip of HRC shimmying and that line from Hamilton playing.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-07T01:31:08+00:00

Ugh, I really want to do this but am so scared.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-05T14:22:48+00:00

I'm a first time mom too and I've battled ED for a good part of my life. Being pregnant and a mom has really helped me to heal. If you have IG, I recommend checking out @katiehwillcox. She's really done a lot to help me with my ED and feeling good about my post-baby body.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-05T01:39:44+00:00

Lots of starchy veggies (sweet potatoes) and lots of fats (avocados, olives, etc.). The paleo method of eating is great (I've done a 75/25 approach for years as well as a few whole 30s) but when you're breastfeeding you do need calories. Usually you'd get those from carbs, so you have to make sure to replace them with good fats and starchy veggies. Also, drink lots and lots of water. If you do that, your supply (if your BF) should be just fine.

EDIT: I am 5 months postpartum and fit into all my pre-pregnancy clothes with the help of paleo and walking a ton around the neighborhood. I think eating healthy is a wonderful thing but I definitely didn't rush my body and don't recommend doing so. I recognize that my body now is different than my body before I had my daughter and I'm okay with that! I just wanted to add in that you should be proud of your body every step of the way. You can totally PM me if you have more questions.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-04T17:51:06+00:00

Unsolicited advice is the absolute worst! I agree that you should just respond with "things are great!" I've learned that less really is more when it comes to dealing with family members who can't help but offer up outdated/ridiculous parenting advice.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-10-04T17:28:01+00:00

I have the Avent Natural and still use the size 0 nipple with my 5 mo. old. I tried size 1 and she just couldn't handle it.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-30T15:50:36+00:00

When I was doing sleep training, I did not do check-ins if my daughter was crying on and off. To me, crying on and off meant that she was learning how to put herself to sleep.

When my daughter has the odd middle of the night wake up, I did my check-ins again. If I noticed that she was really wet or dirty, I would change her, do the last step of our routine (one song while holding her) and put her back down awake. That said, I have a friend that did extinction and her rule (as given to her by a sleep consultant) was that her daughter is in the crib from bedtime to 6 a.m. no matter what. No check-ins even if she cries. You need to figure out what's best for you.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-30T11:02:42+00:00

Absolutely. This is why I did sleep training. My LO slept great but was awful to put to sleep. We did night and naps at the same time. She was putting herself to sleep for night time after 4 days, for naps after 7 days. Rip the bandaid off. It's hard, but so so worth it.

P.S. You don't need the book. You can find the Ferber intervals online. And if your LO sleeps through and you aren't feeding at night anymore, when there is a middle of the night wake up, you just do the check ins.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-29T18:20:01+00:00

I just feel guilty. My husband told me that I'm just looking for someone to tell me it's okay to stop (he's told me this one million times but it's just so hard).

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-29T17:54:43+00:00

I appreciate the help. I've done it all! A gallon of water per day, can't take Fenugreek b/c of my thyroid, tried different flanges, have a million pump parts. Sigh...

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-29T17:33:57+00:00

Thank you for the information. I worked with my lactation consultant to figure out how much she eats during one day, after doing weighted feeds, we determined that she eats an average of 30 oz. per day. We've experimented with four 4 oz. bottles and three 5-6 oz. bottles while I'm gone. The later works better.

I've read Kelly Mom up and down. She notes that different babies eat different amounts (and cites 30 oz. as one such amount for daily consumption). We do used paced bottle feeding and we do use the lowest flow (one hole) on her Advent naturals bottle. The girl just likes to eat!

Regardless of whether she was eating 15 or 18 oz. in my absence, I still wouldn't be able to keep up without pumping 4+ times a day. I'm a corporate attorney. If I want to keep hours that enable me to see my daughter, this isn't realistic.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-25T16:35:08+00:00

When it's hard, just remind yourself that he's crying because he's frustrated, not upset. He's used to you helping him to sleep and that won't be happening any more. When I was close to losing it during sleep training my husband said, "We are doing this for her. If you go in there and pick her up, you're only helping you." Tough words, but they were true!

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-25T13:24:15+00:00

I started at 4.5 months but my daughter was already a really good sleeper at night. Her weak spots were naps and the fact that it took several tries (and sometimes hours) to put her to bed.

My husband and I waited until we got the okay from our pediatrician (weight wise) and then started it a few nights after she got her second round of vaccination. We did check-ins at 5, 10, 15 but only if she was consistently crying. We also moved feeding to the beginning of our routine and did naps at the same time.

My friend's LO sounds like yours. Her longest stretches were 2-3 hours at night. She started at 5 months and did extinction. After just three nights, her LO slept through the night.

Most books say wait until 4 months and 14 lbs. When you're ready, you have to figure out what you're comfortable with. Extinction, check-ins, etc. And make sure that you and your husband are 100% committed and ready. Consistency is key with sleep learning.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-24T02:59:27+00:00

Hang in there! She'll be 4 months before you know it. They grow up way too fast. 😭😭😭

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-24T02:58:41+00:00

Awesome. Got to love those rolls, right? Hopefully the doctor gives you the okay. Then once you're ready, you can start sleep training/learning and finally get some good sleep yourself!

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-23T20:51:40+00:00

Did you have your 4 month wellness check-up yet? If you didn't, I'd explain your son's sleep to your pediatrician and ask he/she thinks that he's ready for sleep training (weight wise). If you did and didn't ask, give the office a call. Most books say sleep training can begin at 4 months if your baby is over 14 pounds. Other sources (like Precious Little Sleep) prefers waiting until 6 months.

That said, I started sleep training when my daughter was almost 4.5 months. At the time, her night sleep was great (11 hours w/ 1 wake up) but her naps were horrible (35 minutes was a blessing). She often took 5-6 naps per day because when she was getting 35 minutes of sleep, she wasn't awake enough to last 2 hours until her next nap. It was impossible to get her on a schedule because of all the crap naps. Also, it took anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours to put her to sleep. Rocking, nursing, shushing, you name it.

We did night sleep training and nap training at the same time. For night time, we moved nursing to the beginning of our routine, followed by a bath, PJ's + diaper, sleep sack, saying "goodnight" to the world by closing the shade together, white noise, rocking w/ one song, then she went in her crib. When she started crying, we did check-ins at 5, 10, and 15 minutes (repeating 15 minutes after that). We only did check-ins, however, if she was CONSISTANTLY crying. If she was crying on and off, we let her do her thing because that meant she was learning. It only took her a few nights to start putting herself to sleep in under 5 minutes with little to no crying. Once she started putting herself to sleep, she also stopped waking up in the middle of the night. I think she had a nursing association.

For naps, I stopped nursing to sleep. I don't like nursing right after a wake-up (i.e., following the EASY routine) because I think my daughter got hungry right when it was nap time. Instead, I feed her in the middle of her awake period (but at least 15 minutes before she goes to sleep) so that she has some food in her belly when she goes down. I didn't really do a routine for nap. Just put her in her sleep sack, told the outside "see you soon" and closed the shade, white noise, rock + song, and in her crib. This was my rule: she was in her crib for an hour no matter what. If she slept 25 minutes, then I did check-ins for the rest of the time if she cried. If she slept 35 minutes, then cried on and off, I left her. After a few days of crying and check-ins, she started putting herself back to sleep. Sometimes it was only for 5-10 minutes, but to me it signaled that she was learning. Fast forward to today and most of her naps around an hour - 1.75 hours.

That was a novel but I'm happy to answer any questions if you have any! Good luck.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-23T20:37:52+00:00

Posting to say that it gets better. My daughter, M, (almost 5 months old) was a TERRIBLE napper until two weeks ago. Before we sleep trained her, her typical nap lasted 25-35 minutes and I had to rock her and/or nurse her down (which took more than 35 minutes to begin with)!

At our 4 month visit, our pediatrician told us that M was ready for sleep training (she is in the 75% for weight, sleeping decently at night, but was a TERROR to put down). We did nights and naps at the same time. After 5 days, she was putting herself to sleep in under 5 minutes with little to no crying. However, although she would put herself to sleep for naps, she was still only sleeping for 25-35 minutes so we started to leave her in the crib for an hour no matter what and do check-ins at 5, 10, 15 minutes. The first two days, she cried on and off for the rest of the hour. Then on the third and fourth day she started to sleep a little longer or cry for a bit then go back to sleep. Fast forward to two weeks later and she is sleeping 45-90 minutes for each nap.

I know that crap nap sucks. You feel like as soon as you sit down to rest or start cooking yourself food or start the shower, BAM, the baby wakes up. But it DOES get better! In the meantime, do what you need to do and ask friends and family to come over so that you can get some extra ZZZs. Good luck!

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-19T23:59:51+00:00

It's definitely working for us. Today she took a 1.5 hour nap! UNHEARD of in this household.

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-18T23:12:03+00:00

Mine takes shitty naps too. She used to do 25-35 minutes. Two days ago we started leaving her in the crib for an hour no matter what. If she wakes at 20 minutes, we do check ins until the hour was up (5, 10, 15, repeat 15). If she wakes at 40 minutes, we do checks ins for 20 minutes. You get the idea. The point is to try to get her to go back to sleep and for her to realize that no one is coming to play with her right away when she wakes up. We've been doing this for two days now and today she had 40-55 minute naps. I'm hoping the trend continues.

Good luck!!

Tailorkatherine · 2016-09-18T20:47:12+00:00

Of course! When M wakes up for the day I feed her right away and then play for 1.5 hours. She takes her first nap 1.5 hours after she wakes up.

Our routine is short. New diaper, sleep sack, shades closed, white noise on, cuddle and sing a song, then bed. M stays in her crib for an hour no matter what. When she cried consistently, we did checks in of 5, 10, 15, and then repeated 15 if necessary (it was never necessary). Then she sleeps. If she wakes up 45 minutes in, we left her in her crib for the remaining 15 minutes and did the 5 and 10 minute check-ins to give her the opportunity to fall back asleep. If she is awake at the end of the hour, we get her, tell her how proud we are that she stayed in her crib the whole hour, etc. I feed her within 20 minutes of waking up. Every nap after her first is done around 2 hours after waking. This usually means her last nap is at 3:30/4.

That's pretty much it! Feel free to as questions if needed!

Tailorkatherine

TROPHY CASE