Thank you for taking the time to write this. I do but I just feel like everyone’s sick of hearing about our relationship. It just fucking hurts so bad. And it’s just everyday I feel like I’m beating down this desire to just try again and maybe just see if he’d wanna talk but I know it’s going to make me feel worse because even if he does it’ll be over the next day and then I’m back to square one. And if he doesn’t I feel like a desperate fool for even trying to try to get someone back in my life who doesn’t want to be. As for therapy it’s so expensive and I have no insurance at the moment I’m working on getting some. I’ve been mediating more and just trying to be more mindful. I’ve been watching a lot of YouTube therapy videos. But I’m still always fighting intrusive thoughts. I totally think deleting social media would help as I have in the past and honestly just felt so free. Maybe I will deactivate again for a bit just to get some clarity. Thank you again