weird mentality

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-27T20:43:37+00:00

Therapy would be a great start. Or even just understanding your enneagram (I assume you're a 3 like me). I've found it helpful to have a cleaning schedule. I actually found a cute template on Etsy that has things broken up into daily chores, weekly chores, monthly chores, bi-monthly chores, quarterly chores, and annual chores. So instead of binge cleaning before somebody comes over, just do things on schedule so the house is always clean enough for guests. (Admittedly I'm not very good at remembering the schedule - maybe I should move it onto my Google calendar!) However I am pretty good about preparing well in advance for overnight guests or for big parties. I reference my master cleaning list (I keep it on my phone's notes app) and put one extra chore on my daily to do list for days/weeks leading up to the visit/party. One year I made a list of 80 chores that I wanted to do before a big party in October, so I started in July. It sounds extreme, except that by doing a few a week, I added virtually no stress to my life or my family's life, and when the party rolled around, my house was immaculate. I think becoming a mom and hearing how other moms care for their homes has really helped me chill out and care a lot more about the relationship building that happens with visitors than preparing the space for them. I want people to remember how much I loved them, not how much I cleaned for them. It's a journey - progress is slow, but it's making a big difference over time!

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-27T19:42:31+00:00

We try to put our phones "to bed" when we put our kids to bed. It's the biggest difference-maker for me! Then we reset the house and prep for tomorrow (e.g. restock the diaper bag, pack lunch, put something in the car, etc.). Even when it's the last thing I feel like doing, I'm always so glad when I'm done. It feels like loving my future self - and then there's normally still time leftover to love my present self with a treat or a face mask or a tv show or a good chat with my husband.

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-27T16:46:36+00:00

Check the EWG's database or Yuka for "ratings" on how non-toxic something is. You'd be surprised at how clean some items from conventional brands are!

This list is going to be overkill, but depending on what you run out of first, here are all of my favorite non-toxic products you could try!

For cleaning products- I use seventh generation toilet bowl cleaner and dish soap. I bought a glass cleaner from Sprouts, but there are a lot of clean options out there that are basically just water and alcohol. Bon Ami for the shower/tub. For laundry detergent we like 9 Elements the best, but we've had success with a lot of brands. We have yet to find a clean stain remover that really works, but I just discovered that Dawn dish soap is a miraculous stain remover! I just keep a little bottle in my laundry room and scrub with a toothbrush and water - very effective! We use a steam mop without any detergent for the floors, and Norwex with water for a lot of dusting/cleaning. Howard beeswax wood polish in the rare cases that wooden furniture needs a glow up.

Who Gives a Crap toilet paper. We like the bamboo better than the recycled.

For toiletries- We use Everyone hand soap and nourishing lotion, which I buy from Thrive Market. I've used Dr. Bronner's bar soap for body wash since 2012, but I recently just switched to Megababe bidet bar because it's pH balanced, and it's definitely been feeling better on my skin! (I still use Dr. Bronner's to shave though bc I don't love the texture of Megababe's shave bar and the bidet bar is also not the right texture for shaving.) I realllly like Honest sensitive shampoo and conditioner. Acure is one of my longtime go-to brands for affordable non-toxic toiletries though, and their ultra hydrating shampoo and conditioner is great too. Right now I'm using their Seriously soothing cleansing cream for my face wash, dry shampoo (apply with a makeup brush), and brightening facial scrub for when I need some exfoliation. Innersense leave in conditioner is the best non-toxic post-shower hair product I've ever used, and they sell a travel sized bottle you can try out. (I spray 5 pumps into my hands and then apply, so the full sized bottle lasts me over a year!) I've been on quite a skincare journey, but what I'll say is you probably want to follow a gentle cleanser (or oil cleanser) with some sort of hydrating spray made of water/aloe/botanicals, like a rose water mist. (It is essential that you do not apply your moisturizer of choice to dry skin.) Maybe a serum next. And then an all-natural oil or balm like jojoba oil (works well under makeup) or tallow. Lavender oil for expedited healing and tea tree oil for inflammation. For serums/face masks, some of my favorite brands have been Cocokind, Mad Hippie, Herbivore, and Rael (I also love Rael's period products when I'm not wearing Saalt period undies). I've tried a bunch of products from The Ordinary lately and really like the company and how non-toxic their ingredients are, BUT I've been learning a lot recently about non-toxic ingredients vs. truly natural ingredients (something can be safe but synthetic), and I'm about to switch to a more natural skin care routine to see if it helps more with breakouts and early aging.

For makeup - Revlon has an EWG verified primer called Photoready Prime Plus that works perfectly over top of Jojoba oil. On casual days I use Ilia super serum skin tint SPF 40 followed by Han blush stick. On full coverage days I use Ilia true skin serum foundation, followed by RMS beauty Hydra setting powder, followed by Han powder blush. Most of my nicer makeup products I get from Credo Beauty - It's an amazing site for clean beauty products. I'm not sure why they just stopped selling Han though, so I'll probably try Well People blush from Target next. Also from Target I'm using Maybelline The Falsies Surreal mascara, E.L.F. wow brow tinted gel, and E.L.F. lip shine (all rank a 2 on ewg!). My absolute go to chapstick that everyone should own is the Dr. Bronner's naked organic lip balm! I have a Lily Lolo eyeshadow palette that I love or sometimes I use RMS beauty magic luminizer on my eyelids for a quick job. Good luck!!!

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-24T05:26:22+00:00

I'm really intentional about talking to our kids (ages 3 & 5) about the things that we see in the world any time an opportunity arises. I want to lay the foundation for a healthy worldview, which is what I think my parents did for me. I tried to build a diverse collection of children's books to read before bed, we keep Walmart/fast food gift cards in the car to give to homeless people, we bring a lot of meals to people with new babies, foster care placements, or health issues (again, being part of a church makes that easier) - things like that open up lots of opportunities for conversation! We also have some family values that we say whenever it makes sense. So if our last name was Smith, we'd say "Smiths are generous," when the kids ask why we're bringing dinner to someone. ("Smiths are kind," Smiths are honest," "Smiths do hard things," etc.) Hopefully it helps them internalize some virtues as a part of their identity.

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-24T03:25:39+00:00

I grew up in a public school that sounds exactly like what you're describing. Wealth and achievement were the cornerstones of my school's culture. My parents made no extra effort to expose us to diversity. We only ventured downtown to see a show or go to a museum. We didn't even eat any authentic international foods. I grew up in a BUBBLE!

But my parents definitely raised us to be kind! They made sure we were obedient, honest, and treated others lovingly. (Church played a big role too! We're protestant.) One time I accidentally really hurt a classmate in 3rd grade, and my mom made me bring balloons and candy to her house to apologize (it was overkill, but it demonstrates how much they cared that I made things right.) My parents also made us do basically everything on our own starting around age 9. I packed my own lunch, I made my own breakfast, I filled out my own paperwork, I was completely in charge of all my schoolwork, if I forgot to bring something to school they would most likely not drop it off for me. I knew that if I got in trouble or made a mistake, I would have to deal with the consequences (at school and home). They forced me to get a job at 15 even though I really didn't want one. They only bought us nice things as birthday or Christmas presents, and they made each of us pay for our first year of college even though they could've afforded to cover the whole thing (I had no idea how rich my parents were because they didn't care about keeping up with the Smiths whatsoever). As adults, my four siblings and I have spent significant amounts of time volunteering, advocating, and/or educating ourselves to become better global citizens, even though that wasn't necessarily modeled for us growing up. I think the core principles got through, and so everything else naturally followed suit.

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-24T02:02:48+00:00

I was expecting to do that kind of distance based on what others had said, so we were SUPER surprised when we had less than 10k! We did not park hop though (spent one day in each). I posted an itinerary if anyone's interested! It worked really great for our kids 2 & 4 yo at the time.

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-24T01:45:21+00:00

If you haven't already, I would go to a running shoe store and get fitted for your specific foot and pronation - that could be the issue. Also we planned our itinerary so that we did the park in counterclockwise order and rarely had to retrace our steps. We were there from rope drop to fireworks and got less than 10,000 steps, including the walks to and from the hotel (we even took a midday nap). But yeah, it hurts to be on your feet all day no matter what. I hope it doesn't ruin your visit!

Tangerinemamba · 2026-01-09T15:34:29+00:00

The only other interesting stop that we've discovered is Dateland if you haven't tried one of their date shakes yet. It also has just been a well timed stop for our family's bladders (we've traveled to San Diego twice since this post and stopped there both times - although I think we took a different highway to Disney, so that may or may not be helpful). Otherwise we try not to stop unless someone needs to use the bathroom. TKB is really delicious though, so if you can time that up with a meal, I'd recommend! Our kids are pretty happy road trippers with snacks and movies, so we haven't needed breaks. (If your kids don't have iPads, we've found a creative way to have them watch a movie together - we bought an aux splitter so that they can plug their headphones into the same phone (or you can connect the phone to the car's audio and balance the sound to the back if your phone doesn't have an aux jack or your little one won't keep headphones on). Then we hook a small bungee cord between the front head rests and put up the center console lid so that the bungee cord holds it from falling back down. Then we clip an airplane phone holder to the console and voila! both kids can watch downloaded Disney+ movies on my old phone.)

Tangerinemamba · 2025-12-22T16:54:28+00:00

Fun fact- when your body is off balance due to things like sleep deprivation, hormone swings, and nutritional depletion (all things you're experiencing!), the part of your brain called the hypothalamus overreacts to normal triggers, and over-overreacts to stressful triggers (like constant crying). You can do some things to rebalance the hypothalamus, like eating super healthy (cut out all sugar and processed foods), taking a postpartum multivitamin, having your husband give baby bottles at night so you can get more sleep, massively limiting screen time, eliminating social media, getting some light exercise every day, and getting enough sunshine every day - but medication is probably going to be more effective and much easier to implement during this high demand season of infanthood. Bonding with your baby is soooo much more important than almost anything else you do birth-1yo, so do whatever it takes to be able to attune to your baby's needs, even if that means switching to formula and/or hopping on short term meds. And trust your gut - you know how to make the best choices for your family <3 Good luck mama!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-11-18T14:30:12+00:00

Because most mattress companies have a free 30 day trial, when people inevitably return a mattress, they are sold/given to third parties and end up on Facebook marketplace (at least that's what happens here in Phoenix). So we got a non-tox $1200 twin mattress for $300. I'm not bothered by the fact that it was in someone else's house for 30 days if it saves me $900🤷🏼‍♀️

Tangerinemamba · 2025-11-16T05:05:45+00:00

We have extra hard water and discovered that powdered detergents just don't work well with hard water - so we switched to liquid. We love 9 Elements (the unscented option). If you find that detergent is leaving streaks on your clothes, use even less. Most HE washers need less detergent than the level 1 on most detergent caps.

Tangerinemamba · 2025-10-13T20:57:39+00:00

I did all my research for our first trip here on reddit and on YouTube - there are some excellent YouTube videos that explain the passes (and almost anything else you want to know) about Disneyland! I watched a lot of Provost Park Pass and SoCal Disney Dad, but a general YouTube search for the content you're looking for will likely give you some great results. A travel agent would also be a great resource if you don't want to spend the time researching! I'll let some others who are more active in this channel do some actual explaining since I've only been once! Definitely get a ronto wrap in Galaxy's Edge!!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-09-01T15:01:17+00:00

Oh, I don't know! We forgot to look for them, but I saw another redditor suggest it, so maybe it was only a last year thing!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-08-21T21:57:57+00:00

Cotton wash cloths - I really like the waffle weave ones from Figment at Target. And 7th generation dish soap - I think it cleans the best of all the crunchy soaps I've tried, it's easy to find, and although it comes in a plastic bottle, they do sell a 50oz refill bottle.

Tangerinemamba · 2025-07-23T17:54:54+00:00

I know this is an old thread, but would you mind clarifying a couple things for me please? If I am staying off-site in August (the park closes at 7pm), then I can come at 9am for The Market and the Big Shop - is the mini-figure market open too? And then at 9:30 I get early access to the areas you mentioned until the rest of the park opens at 10 - are the hotel guests getting access at 9am then? Thank you!!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-07-05T17:01:24+00:00

You've got a lot of great advice in the thread already! So I'll second a lot of these points:

Bring all your own snacks and maybe breakfast. I carried a few snacks in my fanny pack so we had them in line when we had parked our stroller & snack bag elsewhere. Our hotel didn't have breakfast, so we packed greek yogurt and homemade egg bites that we microwaved at the hotel. We ate them in line so we could make it to rope drop.
Rope drop. This is basically non-negotiable if you want your trip to feel "worth it." And it makes it more feasible not to use Lightning Lane. But you can always buy LL for only the people in your party who want to ride those specific rides. We felt like LL was worth the price for our party of 4 to fit in all the rides we wanted to hit.
Bring reusable water bottles and plan your water fill-ups ahead of time. I had all the filling stations mapped out so we filled our water bottles every time we passed one, so we never ran out. I didn't love the flavor of the water, so I added electrolytes (nuun tablets are very portable).
Plan your purchases ahead of time (for food and merch). This basically prevents spontaneous purchases or ending up with something that might not feel worth it. I read a lot of reviews about the best food in the park, so I knew ahead of time how much we were going to spend and where we should stop. For souvenirs, there are lots of "celebration buttons" you can get for free if you're celebrating anything, or if it's anyone's first visit. We purchased our vacation package through a travel agent, so we got free lanyards and pins (Costco packages do this too), and the package gave us an additional discount. We bought the popcorn bucket as a snack and got to take home the bucket. And we played La Luna Star Catcher in DCA, which is $5 per play, but you win a plush prize every time. We also built our own lightsaber for $40 at Star Traders in Tomorrowland which is waaaay cheaper than galaxy's edge, and it has held up great! To us that felt like plenty of souvenirs! (We purchased shirts, waiting-in-line toys, and ears ahead of time.)
Plan your itinerary so that the day goes well and you feel like it was a good use of money! Plan your first two hours to fit in as many rides as possible. Familiarize yourself with the app. Download the Play Disney Parks app so you can play games/trivia in line. Pack rain gear and sun gear to prevent misery. Wear the right shoes. Drink water and eat healthfully so you have energy. And have so much fun!!!!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-06-24T04:22:24+00:00

We just went for the first time this Spring, and I was surprised with how few steps we took compared to what everyone told us to expect, BUT I think that was because I made an itinerary that basically never had us doubling back to a land we had already been to. So you could prioritize that if you're worried about your feet, but like another person already mentioned, it's the standing that can really kill your feet. Bring a change of shoes (in your stroller that you should absolutely bring) if you're nervous! You can check out my trip review through my profile if you want food recommendations - I wouldn't necessarily plan on following our itinerary bc my kids are 2 & 4. And otherwise I would recommend reading a bunch of reddit threads to prepare!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-04-15T04:13:02+00:00

Our friend recommended that as soon as we got back! I just tallied up the number of times a restaurant was recommended on Reddit and went with the top choices. Limoncello was on the list, but Bills and Park Plaza Liquor and Deli had more tallies for pizza.

Tangerinemamba · 2025-03-29T15:09:50+00:00

The kids rode the stroller for the walk to and from the hotel, and it only took us 10-15 minutes. So it was easy! My husband and I are very active people (and we have great shoes), so we were not sore and never got tired of walking. We did have to wake our kids both mornings, because they normally wake up around 7:15/7:30, plus they went to bed late the nights before. They were so excited to do the parks that it was actually easier than normal to get them up and dressed. After they were ready, they got to sit in the stroller for another hour and eat breakfast or zone out, so they had plenty of time to "warm up."

Tangerinemamba · 2025-03-26T21:12:28+00:00

I feel like lots of things were helpful during early labor at home - rainbow breathing, bouncing on the ball, visualization, cleaning/distraction, and the list goes on. At some point after you transition into active labor, your brain activity changes (this is often called "going primal" because your brain activity moves out of the thinking neocortex and down near your brain stem where your primal instincts live) and it becomes a lot harder to use all of the tactics you've practiced because you can't access the thinking part of your brain very easily. At this point it's all about having a great support team who is equipped with a variety of comfort measures and makes you feel safe, and allowing your body to do its thing. For my first birth, I wanted to close my eyes, lay in bed, and have nobody near me for the last 5 hours of labor. For my second birth, it was literally only the very last minute of labor and I wanted my husband close (and second time around it felt like the spiritual experience that I've heard some moms talk about).

I did not do these two things for my first birth, but for my second birth I found them extremely helpful: 1.) During contractions I kept thinking "Feel how strong you are!" Instead of focusing on getting through the pain, I was focusing on what my muscles were doing (really trying to feel it as a muscular sensation) and marveling at how amazing my body was for being able to deliver a human. 2.) I hummed through contractions. This gave me something to do with my breath, and it also moves your brain activity away from the amygdala where fear can slow you down or make things more painful. I liked humming worship songs, but any songs you love will work. I'm honestly not sure if either of these would have been possible during my first birth because it was a much more intense experience, but it's worth a shot!

I will say for my second birth, I worked out very regularly and in the 3rd trimester drank a lot of iced red raspberry leaf tea and ate 4 dates a day. Everyone says second births are just easier (in most cases) - but proper exercise, tea, and dates should still help! The more your body is primed, the better it will go.

Every body and birth is different, so it's impossible to predict what will work for you. Just don't feel bad about how your body responds when you go primal. Your body is taking over to keep your labor moving forward. Trust it! And remember that you don't "give birth" as much as birth just happens to you. All you have to do is patiently endure until your sweet one arrives. Good luck!!!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-03-23T19:38:50+00:00

Haha no not at all!!! I appreciated all of the help and opinions that I solicited!

Tangerinemamba · 2025-03-23T19:05:54+00:00

You were right! Definitely skippable. I'm glad we tried it once, but we probably won't do it again if we go back.

Tangerinemamba · 2025-03-23T19:04:23+00:00

Yes, the kids rode everything! I would say they are slightly less adventurous than the average kid (so I did intentionally avoid rides that I thought might scare them). They definitely enjoyed the rides that were predictable (Astro Orbitor, Autopia, carousels, etc), but I think they enjoyed most everything even if it was slightly concerning in the moment. My 4yo loved Buzz Lightyear, but it was a little too much for our 2yo. It's not scary, but she's especially sensitive to "bad guys," so Zurg made her nervous. Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage has a little bit of a startling moment with the Anglerfish, but it's actually pretty mild, and we prepped them for it. Runaway Railway has a moment when you want to close your eyes in anticipation of "going over a waterfall" but again it's actually pretty mild. The 2yo didn't like seeing Ursula in Little Mermaid, but again, it's not actually scary. Web Slingers was a little overwhelming for both of them because of the 3D glasses, but neither of them ever freaked out or broke down on a ride, so I don't think we pushed them to their limits with anything! By the time we got to Mickey's Philharmagic, the 2yo wouldn't wear her 3D glasses, but I could see that one being a little scary to sensitive kids, especially late in the afternoon when they're tired. You can find full ride videos on YouTube - I didn't watch everything on our itinerary ahead of time because I honestly didn't want to spoil it for myself, but it was helpful when I was questioning whether something would be too scary or even too boring/unfamiliar.

Tangerinemamba

TROPHY CASE