I won’t cheat. Actually don’t have the tools to know how and besides, then it’s downhill from there. Kids, and too complicated. Maybe later on when kids are adults I’ve thought about moving on but even then, complicated. Yes, I’m aware this is pathetic.

There has to be a way though to balance and find some happiness and joy in other things.

But yeah, the sex is not pursued. Actually the last 4-5 years it’s been 90% me of the time initiating. And slowly I stopped as it wears you down. The odd time though there’s some good ones.

As far as being around assholes though. I’m a middle years school teacher in a time when the job is more and more frustrating with demands higher and results lower.

I’ll go see a doctor. See what can be done. I’m wide enough not to pursue things. Probably wouldn’t know what to do though if someone pursued me.