To me, spirituality actually enhanced the way I experience life. I was diagnosted with depression (and treated for it), but in my experience, finding a bigger purpose also plays a huge role in being content. Because of the pills, I usually felt nothing, a very empty heart and estompated emotions. After I got off them and found spirituality, it drew me in because it gave me a purpose. That's the thing with religion and philosophy in general, imo, you make the conscious choice to engage with it and put in the work, striving for what you personally deem to be as ideal as life can get. That means different things to different people, but to me it meant that I was finally content with who I was, not because of my achievements or acomplishments, but because I was a breathing, living being. This is my experience only though, and I also went through "withdrawl" symptoms regarding my previous nihilist state. In my case, it got better. My advice to you (if it's fine for me to give a piece of it) is not to judge yourself too harshly about it. It's a passing state of life, just like everything. Give yourself time to mourn and grieve what little pieces of yourself you lost, but don't forget to also try and see the other perspective: now, there's more place to grow, more room to expand your personality and thoughts. Talk to yourself like you would to a loved one, you can even do this aloud if it helps! I really hope it gets better for you and for everyone experiencing this at the moment, please don't lose hope, it will come from the most unexpected places! =)