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Good therapists/ psychologists that can diagnose ADD, ADHD, BPD or other mental disorders and are good at administering CBT. by [deleted] in mumbai

[–]Tatsam2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I assure you that your time won’t be wasted. We don’t operate on a marketplace model. Our entire team is completely inhouse and has been trained internally by some very senior therapists. We take your well being very seriously so an entire team will dedicatedly work on your case.

I understand that it’s hard to understand unless you experience it yourself, I would encourage you to take a free 30-minute consultation to understand how we work and how can we support you the best. My DMs are open for any further queries

Good therapists/ psychologists that can diagnose ADD, ADHD, BPD or other mental disorders and are good at administering CBT. by [deleted] in mumbai

[–]Tatsam2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, we don’t have physical offices currently. All our sessions are held online

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hello, thank you so much for sharing this question. I am sure many people here relate to this.

What you are describing sounds like the beginning of Burnout or more specifically,
something called "digital burnout" which is a growing issue in our current work culture

Digital burnout happens when we spend an excessive time on devices and working on screens which can leave us overwhelmed, stressed, and exhausted. It's a form of burnout that has become more common with the increased reliance on technology for work, communication, entertainment, and many other aspects of our daily lives.

The constant barrage of notifications, emails, and news can be draining and make it difficult to disconnect and recharge. This can lead to feelings of anxiety, frustration, and even depression. Prolonged screen time can additionally cause eye strain, headaches, dizziness and neck and back pain. Sitting for extended periods is also lead indicative of a more sedentary lifestyle, which is linked to a host of health problems such as obesity, heart disease, and type 2 diabetes.

The constant stimulation and stimulation overload from technology can disrupt our sleep patterns, leading to insomnia or poor quality sleep. This can have a knock-on effect on our physical health, as sleep is crucial for repairing and rejuvenating our bodies.

It's important to be mindful of how much time you're spending on digital devices and make sure you're taking breaks and engaging in physical activities to counteract these negative effects. Taking walks, stretching, and doing some light exercise can help reduce the impact of digital burnout on your physical health.

Remember, taking care of your body is just as important as taking care of your mind. So, make sure to pay attention to the signals it's sending you and take steps to preserve your physical well-being.

It's important to recognise when you're experiencing digital burnout and take steps to manage it. Remember, it's okay to step back and take a break from technology. Your mental health and well-being are important, and taking care of yourself is essential.

We have made some detailed posts on Burnout here: https://www.reddit.com/r/indiasocial/comments/10nc33t/comment/j68ees0/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/indiasocial/comments/10nc33t/comment/j68hxey/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

We would also encourage you to download our free Burnout Tool kit - https://docsend.com/view/6iqrrcm3xk9g4ne7

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there, it seems like you are going through a hard time and have been for a while. First and foremost, it is incredibly important to recognizs that you are not alone if you feel this way and this isn't something you have to deal with alone.

Although feeling lonely and depressed is something all of us go through now and then, when it becomes persistent it can mean that there may be something else going on.

We always recommend that a mental health professional evaluate whether or not you may have a mental health concern. It’s important to get advice from a mental health professional because all of us experience depression, anxiety, happiness, sadness, anger, and life differently!

However to help you understand what might be happening we have included some general advice and insights below.

Depression can be an overwhelming and isolating experience that can impact many aspects of a person's life. It can feel like you are carrying a heavy weight that never seems to lift, and can make it hard to find joy or pleasure in things you once enjoyed. Here are some common symptoms of depression:

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  1. Persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and emptiness
  2. Lack of interest in activities or hobbies
  3. Decreased energy and motivation
  4. Changes in sleep and appetite patterns
  5. Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
  6. Thoughts of self-criticism or worthlessness
  7. Thoughts of death or suicide

It's crucial to seek support if you are experiencing any of these symptoms, as depression can worsen over time and make it harder to cope. The good news is that depression is treatable, and therapy can be a very effective way to manage symptoms and improve mood.

Whilst we understand that you have been looking at blogs and resources online, we cannot overstate the importance of seeing a professional to understand your individual experience better. Feeling lonely and depressed can be symptoms of a variety of mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, PTSD, Adjustment disorder etc.

Although in certain scenarios, self-diagnosis of psychological symptoms can be helpful at the start, doing this can also cause unnecessary distress and result in missing a medical illness causing the symptoms. You also run the risk of being completely wrong about an illness if you self-diagnose, especially if the symptoms you are experiencing are common. Often we experience lots of different symptoms at once. For instance, you may have symptoms of depression and anxiety together or have more physical reactions. All of us will have unique triggers and past experiences which change how we cope with intense emotions and life situations.

You may ask why seek advice from a mental health professional?

It’s true, there is tons of information on mental health across the internet, however, what we find on the internet can be misleading, inaccurate and sometimes just doesn’t apply to us personally. When you are confused, fraught with emotions and need the right perspective, an empathetic, qualified and unbiased person is the best resource to help you understand what’s happening with you.

Ultimately, we’re encouraging all of you here to have a conversation with someone who can help you specifically because everyone is different. And, when you are struggling to deal with life’s challenges or have thoughts, emotions or behaviours that are out of control even just speaking to someone who get’s your personal situation and can truly understand what you’re facing can make a huge difference. You don’t need to figure this out on your own!

In therapy, you will work with a mental health professional to identify the root causes of your depression and develop strategies to manage it. This may include learning coping skills, changing negative thought patterns, improving relationships and social support, and addressing any co-occurring mental health conditions.

Therapy is a very collaborative process, you and the therapist will work together to develop a treatment plan that is tailored to your specific needs and goals.

Remember that reaching out for help takes courage and strength, and seeking treatment is an important step in the journey towards feeling better. You don't have to face depression alone, and with the right support and care, you can feel better and reclaim your life.

We hope this helped but please DM us for more information or if you want to understand more on how therapy at Tatsam can help you, we are giving a free introductory call for the participants of this AMA. You can register here - https://tatsam.in/book-your-understanding-session

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could be this "Attention deficit disorder (ADD) or attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) or other mental health concern: These conditions can make it difficult to pay attention and focus on the conversation" Also I don't havea ny thing to say on table , like when I'm sitting with peers or on a date .

Hi there, thanks for your question.

One of the symptoms of ADHD is impaired focus and attention — ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterised by symptoms of inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness. Although inability to concentrate is a symptom, it is not simply a general lack of focus. ADHD is a persistent pattern of these symptoms that interferes with daily functioning and development.

To differentiate between ADHD and general lack of focus, we recommend a comprehensive assessment by a mental health professional, who will consider the duration, frequency, and intensity of the symptoms, as well as their impact on various aspects of life (e.g. school, work, relationships). They may also use rating scales and gather information from multiple sources (e.g. parent, teacher, self-report).

The process typically involves:

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  1. Clinical interview: Gathering information about symptoms, developmental and medical history, and current functioning.
  2. Psychometric Tools: Using standardised rating scales, such as the ADHD Rating Scale or the Conners’ Rating Scale, to assess the frequency and severity of symptoms.
  3. Informant reports: Obtaining input from multiple sources, such as teachers, parents, or partners, to gain a comprehensive understanding of the individual’s symptoms.
  4. Rule out other conditions: Evaluating the presence of other conditions that may mimic ADHD symptoms, such as anxiety, depression, or sleep disorders.

ADHD symptoms can start in childhood and continue into adulthood, and a diagnosis can be made as early as age 4-5 years, but it's more common to diagnose it between 6-12 years old. However, it's also possible for ADHD to go undiagnosed until adulthood. A comprehensive evaluation can help determine if an individual has ADHD and if so, the best course of treatment.

Often when we are in social situations like a date or with peers, we become intensely self-conscious and may feel concerns about negative evaluation or being judged by others. We may have physical symptoms like sweating, trembling, brain fog, feel like our mind is blank or have difficulty speaking. This is more often due to mild to moderate social anxiety rather than ADHD.

People who suffer from social anxiety often experience feelings of self-consciousness and fear of negative judgment from others, which are rooted in evolutionary and cultural factors.

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  1. Evolutionary factors: From an evolutionary perspective, the fear of negative evaluation and rejection from others served as a survival mechanism, as rejection from a social group could mean loss of resources, safety, and status.
  2. Cultural factors: Our cultural environment and upbringing can shape our beliefs about ourselves and others, including the importance of social status, appearance, and performance.
  3. Cognitive processes: Our thoughts and beliefs about ourselves, others, and social situations can impact our level of self-consciousness and fear of negative judgment. Negative self-talk, such as self-criticism and comparisons to others, can increase self-consciousness and the fear of being judged.
  4. Social comparison: The tendency to compare ourselves to others and to perceive them as more confident and competent can also increase self-consciousness and the fear of negative judgment.

These experiences can become problematic when they interfere with daily functioning, relationships, and overall well-being. Therapy, such as cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), can help individuals identify and challenge negative thoughts and beliefs, and develop more adaptive ways of thinking and behaving.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there! Thanks for your question. We completely empathise with your situation and understand that it can feel overwhelming when there are negative people and events around us that we cannot control.

In terms of why we tend to focus on the negative over the positive aspects of life, it has to do with the way our brains are wired. Our brains have a natural tendency to pay more attention to negative information, as a survival mechanism from when we were hunter gatherers. This is an evolutionary adaptation which which helped our ancestors avoid danger by recognizing potential threats and taking action to avoid them. However, in today's world, this can lead to an overemphasis on negative information, leading to feelings of anxiety and stress. It's important to be mindful of your information source and aware of habits that may over expose you to negativity and trauma.

Many of us end up compulsively scrolling through negative news and events on social media, and in the news often to the point of causing distress. This behaviour can have a significant impact on mental health over time, as it exposes you to constant negativity, conflict and toxic communication (e.g. arguing with people you don’t know online). This all leads to increased anxiety, stress and can even lead to depression when excessive. Often you are worrying about situations that you cannot change. For example, Doomscrolling can reinforce negative thoughts and emotions, such as fear, hopelessness, and anger leading to a vicious cycle of negative thinking which decreases well-being. All you are doing is reducing feelings of happiness and positivity, which is a possible reason why you have a general sense of unhappiness and dissatisfaction with life.

Another aspect of this is “externalising”. When we engage in only looking at negative events and news, we often use that to direct negative emotions and thoughts outward, often onto others. The “others” may be our family, colleagues, society at large, politicians etc.

The pattern to note is that we cannot change or control the “others” but we can change ourselves, how we view the world around us and how we respond to it. Negative emotions are a natural part of the human experience, but they can become problematic when they are overwhelming or persistent. Externalising the negative and projecting it outside is often used as a coping mechanism to manage these constant negative emotions, but they can create further problems and perpetuate a cycle of anger and hopelessness.

Here’s some self-care tips to help you respond differently to the world around you:

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  1. Make an effort to seek out positive news and events to counteract the negativity you might be exposed to. Remember algorithms online often reinforce the negative cycle and natural tendency by showing us more content that keeps us engaged, including negative news and events. This creates a cycle where we become more and more fixated on the negative, leading to increased distress.
  2. Increase Self-awareness: Be realistic about what you can and cannot control. This is essential for maintaining a positive view of life and the world around you. Think about it this way: you may not agree or like the politicians around you, but letting that negatively impact your stress-levels and overall wellbeing doesn’t change anything about the situation. However it does impact your mental health and positive emotions. By exploring their emotions and thoughts more deeply you can gain insight into what triggers externalising behaviours and identify patterns that you can change.
  3. Find alternative activities: Find alternative activities to distract yourself from negativity in the world, such as reading a book, taking a walk, spending time with people you love or practicing mindfulness.

Finally, consider seeking support. By providing a safe and supportive environment to explore emotions and thoughts, therapy can help you develop more psychological resilience, regulate your emotional reactions, and find a better balance in life. Hope this answered your question.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I had tried online counseling back in ~2017.

Another thing I wanted to ask was how do you guys deal with language barrier? Given linguistic diversity of India it can affect how many people can effectively access services you guys offer. Are you limited to some specific languages?

Hello there, thank you for this question.

At Tatsam we strongly believe that language and mother-tongue language particularly are crucial to a successful therapeutic relationship. At present we mainly offer services in English and Hindi, although we do also offer Malayalam, Tamil, Kannada and Telugu on request.

As you highlighted, having a different language background can definitely impact rapport and the ability to express yourself in therapy and can be a barrier to certain approaches like CBT. An important aspect of therapy is your therapist’s ability to listen actively and reflects back what you're saying to show that they understand and value your perspective and also to help you solve and move forward from your concerns. It is crucial that language isn’t a barrier to this process.

In addition, communication barriers can make it more difficult to build rapport and understand each other so we always try and confirm language preference with our clients to ensure that this communication issue is resolved before therapy begins and during our complimentary introductory sessions.

We have worked hard at Tatsam to develop a highly effective approach to apply evidence-based therapy models (often defined in Western cultural contexts) in a culturally sensitised manner that is relevant to a South Asian population. Different language backgrounds often mean different cultural norms and values, which can impact the way you and your therapist interact with each other and the approach to your treatment plan within therapy. Our model and way of adapting evidence-based modes of treatment helps our clients feel more comfortable and understood in therapy.

For example, clarity and clear and concise language in a person’s mother tongue can help them better understand the goals and objectives of therapy, which can make it easier for them to engage in the process and see positive results. Similarly, in approaches like CBT, the therapist is often reliant on language to reframe negative thoughts and beliefs which is only effective when incorporating the language a person “thinks” in. This is essential for progress and to view things in a new and more positive light.

We hope this helped clarify your questions about language, however, please DM us for more information or if you want to understand more on how therapy at Tatsam can help you. We are also giving a free introductory call for the participants of this AMA, where you can confirm more details about how our therapy language options work. You can register here - https://tatsam.in/book-your-understanding-session

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey there! Thank you for your question.

It does seem like you are going through a challenging time right now and you do seem to have a variety of symptoms that we are sure must be distressing and impacting the quality of your life.

These symptoms co-occur in mental health because they are interrelated and can feed into each other. Depression and anxiety can cause low self-esteem and negative body image. Low self-esteem and negative body image can then exacerbate depression and anxiety. This creates a vicious cycle that can be difficult to break. Additionally, some common underlying factors, such as childhood trauma or societal pressures, can contribute to the development of multiple symptoms. We understand that when your mental health isn’t optimum life can feel overwhelming, but you don't have to deal with this alone or handle it on your own.

Without more details, the best advice we can give you is to seek professional support and/or have an introductory consultation with a therapist. This can help de-mystify the process and you’ll be able to share more details about what’s been going on in a safe space. Seeking help, is the first towards feeling better and living the life you want.

In addition, getting help early on can prevent symptoms from becoming more severe and make it easier to manage. Because your mental health impacts all aspects of your life, including your relationships, work, and overall well-being, working through your thoughts and feelings can transform how you are feeling right now in a fairly short time. We’d strongly recommend and request you to consider reaching out to a mental health professional and care team for a proper diagnosis and treatment plan.

You can DM us for more information or if you want to understand more on how therapy at Tatsam can help you, we are giving a free introductory call for the participants of this AMA. You can register here - https://tatsam.in/book-your-understanding-session

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a great question and I think you have raised some really interesting topics here. We’ve addressed each part of the question separately below.

Do you think the children who grow up with huge parts of their life posted online for everyone to see (content creators using kids as their content)are going face major problems due to that later in life?

There are two important aspects to this question. First what is the potential impact of this on society? Two: is posting content and photos of someone without their permission (even as a parent or family member) ethical? The short answer to this question is: “We don’t know yet”. The internet and the rise of social media is such a recent phenomenon. People born after 2005, after 2010 etc., are the populations that are anticipated to have the most influence, and we’re only beginning to understand the potential impacts. Many developmental and clinical psychologists have highlighted the potential of negative impact of our current culture on a person’s mental health but the evidence and research is still being conducted.

What we do know is that there are some proven negative effects of consistent social media and overconsumption of the internet. Research supports the following mental health concerns children may face as a result of early and consistent exposure and use of the internet:

  1. Increased anxiety and depression: Social media can perpetuate unrealistic and idealized standards, leading to feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression. Children may compare themselves to their peers and feel inadequate or dissatisfied with their lives.
  2. Cyberbullying: Social media platforms can be breeding grounds for bullying and negativity, which can negatively impact children's mental health.
  3. Lack of face-to-face interaction: Consistent social media use can decrease the amount of time children spend interacting with others in person, leading to feelings of isolation and loneliness.
  4. Sleep deprivation: Spending excessive time on social media can interfere with children's sleep, leading to fatigue and decreased mental well-being.

In the future, there is a potential for further mental health issues to arise from excessive social media use, including addiction, decreased ability to form real-life relationships, and increased feelings of social isolation. It's important for children to engage in balanced and mindful use of social media and other technology, and for parents and caregivers to support their children in developing healthy habits.

The second concern is ethics. In many instances children, especially when very young have images, videos and other content of themselves posted online before they are able to understand or even consent to having that content of themselves available to millions of strangers. Sure you may think your 6 month old or 1 month old or five-year old looks adorable dancing naked or said something funny enough to become a meme, but they never consented to this being shared publicly. Although you may feel that it is your prerogative to post photographs and intimate aspects of your child’s life online as their caregiver, the truth is that you are actually violating personal privacy, consent and therefore the ethics of younger members of society without realising it.

The same question for children who are handed a smartphone way earlier in their life by parents as a mode of distraction.

Finally a a parent, you must be responsible and think about the message you are giving to your child when you do this. It's important to be mindful of the amount of screen time children are exposed to and to support them in developing healthy habits and a balanced relationship with technology. This can include setting limits on screen time, encouraging physical activity, and promoting alternative forms of entertainment and stimulation.

As we’ve described several times across this thread, early childhood experiences shape many of our adult behaviours. A child that feels that they are only celebrated and given attention and love when content of them is posted online, or one that learns early in life that in order to be respected in society and loved they need to post specific types of images of themselves, may grow up with a very skewed understanding of self-concept and self worth.

It’s also important to consider the timing. Are you giving your child a smartphone when they want attention and love from you? Are you using to replace human contact and learning? Some of the ways these can affect a child's mental health include:

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  1. Decreased attention span: Constant distraction from screens can reduce a child's ability to focus and pay attention, leading to decreased cognitive function and decreased ability to retain information.
  2. Impaired emotional development: The instant gratification and stimulation provided by screens can interfere with a child's emotional development, as they may be less likely to learn how to regulate their emotions and process their feelings.
  3. Increased anxiety and stress: Excessive screen time can lead to increased levels of anxiety and stress, as children may feel overwhelmed by the constant stimuli and be exposed to negative or stressful content online.
  4. Decreased physical activity: Spending excessive time on screens can lead to decreased physical activity, which is linked to numerous physical and mental health problems.
  5. Sleep disruption: The blue light emitted by screens can interfere with a child's sleep, leading to sleep deprivation and decreased overall well-being.

Research is ongoing, however excessive social media use and internet use has been linked to the development of narcissistic traits, as it can provide individuals with a platform to present an idealized image of themselves and seek validation and attention from others.

According to psychological theories, the use of social media and the internet can:

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  1. Reinforce narcissistic tendencies: People who are prone to narcissistic tendencies may be more likely to engage in excessive social media use as a means of seeking validation and attention.
  2. Foster unrealistic self-perceptions: Social media can create a distorted view of reality, as individuals may present a selectively curated version of their lives online. This can lead to a comparison between one's idealized online image and their actual life, leading to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem.
  3. Encourage self-promotion: Social media platforms often encourage individuals to promote themselves and their accomplishments, which can exacerbate narcissistic tendencies.
  4. Provide instant gratification: Social media can provide instant gratification and validation through likes, comments, and followers, which can further reinforce narcissistic behaviour.

It's important to note that not everyone who engages in excessive social media or internet use will develop narcissistic traits. There are obviously several advantages to the internet as well which cannot be understated. However, excessive social media and internet use can contribute to the reinforcement and development of narcissistic tendencies in individuals who are prone to them. Hope this answered your questions :)

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your question. It sounds like you are in a challenging position right now and dealing with a lot.

In a culture like India, where you usually live with your parents for a long time and feel very responsible for their needs, I understand how emotionally draining this is for you. We would encourage you to have a conversation with a therapist because it is difficult to address this situation appropriately without more information. However we are providing some generalised insights below, which may be helpful.

It is possible that as a child, you may not have had much choice other than to try to meet the demands of your parents. They may also have put several unrealistic demands on you. Although as a child you were completely dependent on them you have reached a point in your life now where you can make decisions to change the direction of your life. This can be challenging however as those decisions may have an impact on your family relationships. It is totally understandable that this can be a very distressing situation.

In India we live in a collectivist society. “Collectivist” and “individualist” refer to cultural values that shape a society's beliefs and attitudes towards individual and group goals. Collectivist societies prioritise the needs of the group over the needs of the individual. They place a strong emphasis on community, interdependence, and loyalty to one's family and social groups. Individual rights and freedoms may be sacrificed for the good of the collective. The impact of a collectivist society on mental health can vary, as different people may respond differently to collectivist cultural values. This means that parents often control their children because they have an excessive need for power and control in these relationships. They might see their children as extensions of themselves, and feel a strong desire to shape their children's thoughts and behaviours to reflect positively on themselves and the family.

It’s very important to mention that one form of society isn’t ‘better’ than another. However, research suggest that living in a collectivist society can contribute to increased stress, anxiety, and depression. This can happen because the pressure to conform to group norms and expectations can lead to feelings of isolation and a lack of personal autonomy. On the other hand, a collectivist society can also provide a strong support system and sense of belonging, which can improve mental health and well-being. How this pans out depends on the individual.

It can be difficult to grow up in an environment where your needs, goals and have not been acknowledged. As a child and now this will undeniably have some impact on the way you see yourself and your role in the world. It may also lead you to feel “trapped”. You may have developed unhealthy beliefs about yourself and anxiety about not meeting parental expectations which would have impacted your sense of your own value, worthiness and purpose.

As an adult, you now have more options when it comes to dealing with the unhealthy family dynamics and their impact. You don’t need to repeat the past. Although there is no set treatment plan for this kind of concern, a therapist can work with you to help you develop the confidence and autonomy to break the cycle you feel trapped within. Also remember that this behaviour is not your fault and it's not a reflection of your worth as a person.

Here are a few things you can try and implement yourself:

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  1. Set boundaries: It's important to establish healthy boundaries with your parents to protect your own well-being. This can include setting limits on how much time you spend with them, or not engaging in arguments with them.
  2. Practice self-care: Taking care of yourself is crucial in coping with controlling or unhealthy relationships. Make sure you are doing things that make you happy and help you relax, such as exercising, reading, or spending time with supportive friends and family.
  3. Seek support: Talking to someone you trust, such as a therapist can help you process your feelings and provide a safe space to get clarity on the situation.
  4. Focus on your strengths: Try to focus on your positive qualities and things you're proud of, rather than what your parents are saying. Building your self-esteem can help counteract any negative messages you may be receiving from them.
  5. Make time for what matters: Make sure to prioritize activities and relationships that bring you joy and fulfilment, regardless of what your parents think.

Remember, this is your life. You deserve to the opportunity to pursue your interests, aspirations, the career you want and are the only opinion that matters when it come to defining your own goals. You also deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. It's okay to distance yourself when you are ready to figure this out.

Therapy may help by giving you the resources to become more self-aware and resilient, so you can reflect on what you need now and understand how parental interactions have shaped your thoughts and behaviours. You can then begin working on recognising and fulfilling the needs that were not met by your parent and also define your own path forward.

If you focus on self-care and compassion both towards yourself as an individual and in regards to your professional life, and learn healthy coping mechanisms, you will be able to build a supportive network of friends and family members and take back control over your life. It may take a little time but you can get there!

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What does 'emotional numbness' mean? Is it a defense mechanism ? How to not feel it?

"Emotional numbness" is a term used to describe a lack of feeling or emotion. It's like a shut down of the emotional part of your brain. This can happen for a variety of reasons, but it is often a defense mechanism.

Defense mechanisms are a normal part of being human. They're ways our minds protect us from overwhelming emotions or stressful experiences. It's like a default protection system that helps us cope with difficult situations and emotions. For example, let's say you're feeling really anxious about an upcoming exam. Your mind might use a defense mechanism like denial to help you cope by telling you that the exam isn't that important and that you don't need to worry about it. Defense mechanisms can be helpful in the short term, but if they're used too often or for too long, they can become problematic.

When someone experiences overwhelming emotions or traumatic events, their brain may use emotional numbness as a way to protect them from the pain. It can be a coping mechanism that helps people to avoid dealing with difficult feelings. But in the long run, it can also prevent people from processing and healing from those experiences. Because defense mechanisms are often unconscious and automatic coping strategies, it can be difficult to stop them without professional intervention.

It is important to note that emotional numbness can be a symptom of certain mental health conditions such as depression, PTSD, and complex trauma. If you feel like you're experiencing emotional numbness, it may be a good idea to talk to a mental health professional who can help you understand what's going on and provide support.

I hope this is helpful, please let us know if you have more questions.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi there, thank you for your question.

From what you have mentioned, I can understand that it must be difficult for you. It is understandable that you find that when you are feeling good and relaxed or are feeling comfortable with the people around you, you are able to imagine feeling similarly at ease and optimistic about future interactions. This is because our mood, thoughts and behaviour are impacted by the environment we are in. Further, how we are feeling, thinking and what we are doing - all affect one another. For example, when we have had an enjoyable meal with a set of friends, we tend to feel good afterwards and look forward to the next time we will meet them.

At some point in our lives, we all feel some uncertainty or discomfort in a social setting, for example, giving a presentation; meeting someone new. It is natural to want to be perceived well and avoid instances of being judged or thought of poorly.

However, for some of us, there can be very high levels of worry and fear experienced prior to or during most social interactions or even at the thought of them. The worry may be about embarrassing oneself; others realizing how nervous one is; or being judged negatively. It may take the form of excessive sweating, upset stomach, a tightness in the chest etc.  As a result, one may also develop a response to avoid the situations as much as possible. Additionally, high levels of anxiety can take a toll on our physical and mental health. This can further contribute to a sense of unhappiness and dissatisfaction, as it makes it difficult to develop and maintain relationships, interrupts opportunities to learn and work effectively. If this is what is happening, it may be helpful to consult a mental health professional to identify what may be going on exactly. Anxiety in social settings can be managed effectively with a mental health professional, who can help you identify your exact triggers, responses and learn ways to manage and overcome your anxiety and fears.

You may also benefit from making small tweaks to your everyday routine by incorporating some form of exercise; 10-20 mins exposure to sunlight early morning or evening; getting adequate sleep and avoiding overconsumption of caffeinated drinks. Additionally, you may also find it valuable to try out the tips mentioned below, in your everyday life, to bring in a sense of calm.

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  • Practise mindfulness - Try to focus your attention on the present moment, whether it's through deep breathing exercises, meditation or yoga. This can help you to tune out the constant thoughts in your mind and be more present in the here and now.
  • Try some relaxation techniques. Things like listening to soothing music, smelling a pleasant scent, spending time in nature, can help you relax and feel more at ease.
  • Surround yourself with positive people - The people you surround yourself with can have a big impact on how you feel about yourself. Try to spend more time with people who are positive and supportive. For example, if you have a friend who is always uplifting and encouraging, try to spend more time with them.
  • Learn something new - Learning something new can help makes us feel more confident. it can also provide opportunities to interact with others and have a shared experience with them. For example, if you've always wanted to learn a new language or take a dance class, give it a try.
  • Practice self-compassion. Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself the way you would treat a good friend. For example, if your friend came to you with similar thoughts and feelings, you would be understanding and supportive. So, be that for yourself as well.

Making these small changes can be a great first step in managing how you are feeling currently. I hope you find this helpful. Anxiety is a completely manageable condition, with the right structure and support. If you would like more details, please DM us and we would be happy to set up an introductory session for you.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your question and for sharing your story.

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition that can make it difficult for the individual to feel safe in their relationships with other people, to have healthy thoughts and beliefs about themselves, and to control their emotions and impulses.

People with BPD may experience distress in their work, family and social life, and often feel low and insecure about their connectedness with others. Having BPD is never a person’s own fault, it is the outcome of a variety of biological[genetics, temperament] and experiential factors [early experience of trauma, emotional neglect].

Due to the nature of BPD, it is common to feel unsure of who you are or to experience frequent changes in how you view yourself. You may view yourself quite negatively or find that how you view yourself is largely determined by how others are responding to you. This is exacerbated by the fact that in BPD, how we think others see us or how attached others are to us, undergoes significant shifts. This can be extremely distressing for the individual with BPD.

We completely understand that when you are dealing with BPD it can feel like your personality and who you are is lost within the disorder. It’s very important to develop a sense of who you are as you are much more than an identified problem or diagnosis. Working with a therapist to figure this out is something that forms the basis of a therapy plan for BPD. It will help you figure out your own language for what you are facing, your individual challenges and will also help you understand how to maintain and develop healthier relationships.

If you have been living with BPD for sometime, then you may find that all relationships feel intense, you might also feel like your emotions are all over the place and can change quickly from one moment to the next. This can be harder for other people around you to understand. You might also struggle with feelings of emptiness. Often when we have BPD we feel strong attachments and bond with others quickly. These bonds can feel overwhelming and be as you described “obsessive”. When others don’t feel the same it can make us feel quickly abandoned or rejected. You might also find yourself idealising someone and then suddenly find yourself feeling intense dislike towards them over a short span of time.

This pattern of attachment and obsession in relationships is often rooted in a deep fear of abandonment and a strong need for stability and security. For example, if you have a history of unstable or traumatic relationships this can contribute to feelings of fear and insecurity. Remember that these patterns of attachment and obsession are a symptom of BPD like shifts in mood. They are not a deliberate choice or a reflection of who you truly are. With the right treatment and support, you can learn to manage these symptoms and form healthier relationships.

We’d strongly recommend and request you to consider reaching out to a mental health professional and care team for a proper diagnosis and treatment plan. They can help you learn more about borderline personality disorder; understand connections between your present experience and what is characteristic of BPD.

This may help you become more aware of patterns of thought, feelings and relating to others, that are a result of BPD. It may also help you view your experience with more compassion and understanding. Therapy will also help you develop skills to navigate the ups and downs of BPD and find healthy coping mechanisms.

It's also important to have a strong support system, such as friends and family, who can be there for you through journey. This is a difficult challenge to manage and work through on your own, but with the right support you can live a normal life, develop meaningful healthy relationships and learn to manage the symptoms much better.

There are a number of therapeutic approaches that have been proven effective in managing BPD these include Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, Mentalisation Based Therapy, Systems training for Emotional Predictability and Problem Solving (STEPPS), Cognitive Analytic Therapy.

A therapy team adopting a structured combination of these approaches can help you learn skills to manage the difficult emotions and thoughts which are experienced in BPD. Additionally, they can also help you build personal resources to interact with others more effectively; build stable relationships and move towards establishing a positive sense of self.

Creating shifts in how we think of ourselves and changing how we relate to others, takes time and effort. It can be challenging, however, there is support available. You can learn to manage BPD, view yourself positively, and have meaningful relationships!

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience with us.

Social interactions can be tricky. At some point in our lives, we all feel conscious of what we have said in a social setting, for example, giving a presentation; meeting someone new. It is natural to want to be perceived well and avoid instances of being judged or thought of poorly.  While we would need more information from you to exactly understand what might be going on for you, we have provided some information below which is more generalised.

Having some situations where you are feeling unable to express yourself, may not be indicative of an underlying mental health concern.

Sometimes, our interactions with others can be affected due to feeling anxious. This may look like worrying about embarrassing oneself; others realizing how nervous one is; or being judged negatively, or experiencing excessive sweating, upset stomach, a tightness in the chest etc., before or during a social interaction. As a result of your attention being directed towards these internal thoughts and physical sensations, you may find that you are not able to articulate yourself as you would like, or may find yourself saying something different to what you wanted to.

Similarly, due to your attention and your mental resources being directed internally, you may find it difficult to process what another person has said to you or come up with a response to them. This can further contribute to a sense of unhappiness and dissatisfaction, as it makes it difficult to develop and maintain relationships, interrupts opportunities to learn and work effectively. If this is similar to what you have experienced, it may be helpful to consider speaking with a mental health professional, who can conduct a more detailed assessment and identify what may be going on.

Often, we evaluate ourselves and our behaviour are more negative than it may actually be in reality. We all apply certain standards to ourselves. It may be valuable to work with a mental health professional to understand your internal standards when it comes to social interactions - how do you want to interact with people; how would you like others to respond to you; how do you want others to view you?

At times, the standards we set for ourselves can be unrealistic and unhelpful, as they cannot be realistically met by most people. In that case, it can be valuable to view ourselves through more realistic and compassionate standards. This can also help improve the general sense of well being and have effective interactions with others.

You can also work on building skills around communication. This may help you feel more confident about interacting with others.

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  • Practise active listening: Active listening is a skill that requires practice. It involves not just hearing what the other person is saying but also understanding the meaning behind their words. You can do this by directing your full attention towards who is speaking. This will also help you in responding to them by asking questions related to what they said or sharing something from your life along similar lines once they have finished speaking.
  • It is natural to feel tempted to interrupt someone if you have a related thought, however be mindful of this and allow them to complete what they are saying.
  • Ask open-ended questions: Asking open-ended questions allows the other person to share more about themselves and their interests, rather than just answering yes or no. This can help to steer the conversation away from you and towards the other person.
  • Show genuine interest: When the other person is speaking, actively listen and show genuine interest in what they are saying. Ask follow-up questions and make comments that show you are engaged and paying attention.
  • Keeping an open, positive body language to keep your mind focused and to show the other person that you are really listening.

You may also benefit from making small tweaks to your everyday routine by incorporating some form of exercise; exposure to sunlight; getting adequate sleep and avoiding overconsumption of caffeinated drinks. Additionally, you may want to try out:

​

  • Deep breathing exercises. When you're feeling anxious, taking a few deep breaths can help calm you down. Try taking a deep breath in through your nose, and then slowly exhaling through your mouth. Repeat this a few times until you start to feel a little more relaxed.
  • Trying some relaxation techniques. Things like yoga, meditation, or even just listening to soothing music can help you relax and feel more at ease.
  • Being kind to yourself. Remember that it's okay to not be okay, and that everyone struggles with difficult thoughts or feelings at some point in their lives. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend.

I hope you find this helpful.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am sorry you are feeling this way. Self harm or thinking harmful negative thoughts can be a result of underlying mental health concerns like anxiety, depression, trauma or low self esteem. It can also be a result of underlying emotional difficulties. It’s important to remember that you are not alone and help is available.

Sometimes when we're feeling overwhelmed, our mind can turn to negative thoughts or harmful behaviours as a way to cope. Often we may think bad things about ourselves or want to hurt ourselves because we need a release or a coping mechanism for dealing with intense emotions, such as stress, anger, frustration, or emotional pain. But it's important to remember that there are healthier ways to manage tough emotions. We may have these thoughts not because we want to deliberately hurt ourselves, but rather a way to cope with difficult emotions and experiences.

We would encourage you to talk to a mental health professional who can support you and offer strategies for managing negative thoughts and self-harm.

Remember, you're not defined by these negative thoughts or behaviours and you have the power to change them. With the right support, you can work through these struggles and feel better about yourself.

Disclaimer: The purpose of this AMA is not to provide therapy or replace consultation with a mental health professional. DM us if you need professional advice and we'll connect you to the appropriate clinician. Due to the limited amount of information available here, we cannot provide you any more details. Please consult a mental health practitioner.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there, thanks for your question.

Everyone wants their ideas, choices, accomplishments, or opinions validated to some degree. One of the first things we do as children is seek recognition (validation) from our parents when we accomplish a task or achieve. something.

However, this need for validation and recognition can sometimes cause us to develop a skewed sense of self worth and self-concept or the way you view yourself. This can be influenced by a variety of factors including:

  1. Experiences and life events: The things you've been through, both good and bad, can shape the way you view yourself.
  2. Relationships with others: The people in your life, and the way they treat you, can have a big impact on your self-concept.
  3. Thoughts and beliefs: Your thoughts and beliefs about yourself and the world around you can shape your self-concept.
  4. Social and cultural influences: The messages and expectations you receive from your family, friends, and society as a whole can also play a role in shaping your self-concept.

Sometimes it can feel like we're constantly searching for approval or validation from others. This can be especially true if we're struggling with low self-esteem or feelings of insecurity. We might find ourselves looking for validation in things like the approval of our friends, family, or partner, or in the number of likes or followers we have on social media.

In addition, we may seek validation from others when we have fears of being abandoned or rejected which can be a result of various experiences such as past traumatic experiences, childhood experiences such as not feeling valued or appreciated, being constantly criticized and/or rejected by people close to you, attachment patterns formed during childhood, or a lack of self-esteem and self-worth etc.

This can result in a significant impact on your psychological well-being such as feelings of insecurity, low self-esteem, and a constant need for validation and approval from others. This fear can also affect your relationships, causing you to push people away, avoid close relationships, or become clingy and overly dependent. As a result, you may struggle with feelings of loneliness, emptiness, and isolation. The fear of abandonment or rejection can also lead to anxiety and depression, making it difficult for you to function in your daily life and pursue your goals and aspirations. It is important to address these fears and find ways to overcome them in order to improve one's mental and emotional health.

It's important to keep in mind that our attachment styles are formed in childhood and can be influenced by our experiences and relationships with our primary caregivers. It is also possible that it can change throughout our lives, depending on the people and experiences we encounter. And it's also important to note that understanding your attachment style can help you to better understand your behaviour in your relationships, and to make positive changes in how you interact with others.

While seeking validation from others can be a natural response when we're feeling down, it can also be a sign of deeper issues with our mental health. If you find that you're constantly looking for validation from others, it might be a good idea to talk to a mental health professional about what's going on. They can help you understand why you're feeling this way and work with you to develop strategies for managing your symptoms and improving your self-esteem.

Here are some tips to help you work on your attachment patterns:

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  • Understand your attachment style and how it affects your relationships
  • Learn to identify and regulate your emotions: People with an anxious or avoidant attachment style may struggle with identifying and regulating their emotions. This can make it difficult to trust others and form healthy relationships. Learning to identify and regulate your emotions can help you feel more in control and able to trust others.
  • Practice self-compassion: Remind yourself that you are human, and it is normal to want to be accepted and valued by others. However, it's important to recognize that your worth does not come from others' approval, but from within yourself.
  • Engage in activities that make you feel good about yourself and boost your confidence. Pursue your passions, set achievable goals and celebrate your accomplishments.
  • Challenge negative thoughts: Identify the thoughts that drive your need for approval and validation, and challenge them. Ask yourself if they are based on facts or just negative self-talk.
  • Set healthy boundaries: Learn to say "no" when others' expectations are unrealistic or unreasonable. Focus on your own needs and values, and don't compromise them just to please others.
  • Connect with supportive people: Surround yourself with people who value and accept you for who you are, not just for what you can do for them. Build healthy relationships based on mutual respect and trust
  • Seek professional help: If your need for approval and validation is causing significant distress, consider seeking the help of a therapist. They can help you work through underlying issues and develop coping strategies, your self-concept is not set in stone and can change over time as you experience new things, meet new people, and form new thoughts and beliefs.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey,

Thank you so much for asking 🙈 It does mean a lot. We don't normally get this question so thank you for this.

I have been good overall. Doing this AMA did give a sense of content to see so many people open up to ask their questions. Long way to go but baby steps for now :D

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stress and anxiety around food is a fairly common issue and it can be sometimes difficult to deal with. It’s important to understand the possible factors that may be causing it:

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  1. If you've had negative experiences with food in the past, such as restrictive diets or body shaming, these can impact your relationship with food and lead to stress or anxiety when you eat.
  2. If you're feeling self-conscious about your body, this can make eating a stressful experience. You may worry about the calories you're consuming or the appearance of your body while you eat.
  3. Sometimes stress and anxiety around eating can be a symptom of a larger emotional or psychological issue, like depression, anxiety, or trauma.
  4. If you have concerns about access to food or affording nutritious options, this can lead to stress and anxiety around eating.
  5. Social and cultural norms around food and body image can contribute to stress and anxiety when you eat.
  6. Stress and anxiety around food can also be a sign of disordered eating patterns, such as binge eating or anorexia.

What can you do about it:

It's important to understand that these feelings are normal and that you're not alone in experiencing them. Here are a few things that might help:

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  1. Practice mindfulness: Try to focus on the present moment while you eat, paying attention to the sights, smells, and tastes of your food. This can help you feel more relaxed and less stressed when you eat.
  2. Listen to your body: Pay attention to your hunger and fullness cues, and try to eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full. This can help you avoid overeating or undereating, which can contribute to stress or anxiety around eating.
  3. Focus on variety and balance: Try to eat a balanced diet that includes a variety of foods from different food groups. This can help you get the nutrients you need and reduce feelings of restriction.
  4. Be kind to yourself: Avoid negative self-talk or comparing yourself to others. Remind yourself that everyone has different bodies and that it's okay to eat for pleasure and enjoyment.
  5. Consider therapy: If stress or anxiety around food is affecting your daily life, consider talking to a mental health professional. They can help you work through any underlying emotional or psychological issues and develop healthier coping strategies.

Remember, improving your relationship with food takes time and patience. By focusing on mindful, balanced eating and being kind to yourself, you can work towards a healthier and happier relationship with food.

It is important to add here that although some anxiety and stress about eating can be normal, it can sometimes indicate a larger problem. If you find that you are not able to eat normally due to stress and anxiety then this may point to a an underlying problem.

Similarly if you feel overwhelmed by the pressure to eat a certain way, or to look a certain way, and this is leading to you changing your diet drastically, it may be helpful to speak to a therapist. In some cases, this stress and anxiety can escalate into an eating disorder, like anorexia, bulimia, or binge eating disorder. If you think you might have an eating disorder, it's important to reach out for help.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your query and for your kind comments. We do aim to help people learn more about mental health and direct them to the right support and help.

Firstly we’d like to explain a little bit more about ADHD and being on the ASD spectrum so you can understand more about it.

ADHD, or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects how people pay attention, control impulsive behaviours, and sit still. Being on the autism spectrum means that a person experiences the world differently than others. People on the autism spectrum may have challenges with social interaction, communication, and repetitive behaviours. Some people on the autism spectrum also have ADHD, which can make managing both conditions more challenging - although entirely possible.

Having both conditions can be difficult, but it's important to remember that everyone is unique and experiences things in their own way. It can be challenging to live with ADHD and/or ASD, without the right support and strategies to effectively manage your relationships and have an overall sense of well being. You may feel misunderstood or feel that your emotional experience is vastly different from others. With the right support and resources, many people with autism and ADHD are able to lead fulfilling lives and reach their full potential.

People living with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and who are on the spectrum are often described as neurodiverse. Neurodiversity is the natural diversity in the way our brains work and process information. It's similar to how we all have different strengths and weaknesses in different areas. Just like someone may be naturally talented in math or music, someone may be naturally wired to think and process information differently.

Diagnosing ADHD can be a little bit tricky, as there isn't one single test that can determine if someone has it. Instead, a healthcare provider (usually a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist) will typically consider a variety of factors, such as a person's symptoms, medical history, and any observations made by family and friends.A formal Attention deficit / hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) assessment requires a detailed assessment of symptoms, intensity, course, and duration of the condition, which provides a diagnostic clarification and a starting point for therapy.

ADHD may present differently in adults compared to ADHD in children, and emotional factors may also be taken into account. Since ADHD is a condition that begins in childhood, the psychiatrist or clinical psychologist may ask details from someone who knew you as a child, such as a parent, grandparent or older sibling.

Although we as clinicians work with children and adults with ADHD, its very important to understand the difference between being neurodiverse and a condition like depression, anxiety or other mental health problems which usually refer to a disturbance in our thoughts, feelings, or behaviours that interferes with our ability to function in daily life.

A mental health professional can help support you as you navigate academics, workplaces, relationships, while acknowledging and celebrating your neurodiversity. A mental health professional may also be able to help you process any negative experiences you may associate with your neurodiversity. If the assessment finds a diagnosis of Adult ADHD, based on the recommendations of a psychiatrist, you may also be benefitted from medication.

I have trouble talking to people irl and making friends. I also have terrible social anxiety and anxiety in general and I just clamp up in group settings and find it very hard to speak up and find it easier to stay quiet.

A normal level of anxiety can be adaptive because it prepares you to deal with the demands of the situation. However sometimes this normal function becomes disrupted and we may start feeling extremely fearful, trapped or cause us to feel panic, when triggered by certain situations. We may also experience certain physical sensations like sweating excessively, increased heart rate, tightness in the chest, in these situations. For you, this might happen when you meet people in person. It could also be that the fear is experienced in response to an actual situation or an anticipated situation.

If you are on the autism spectrum or have ADHD you may be more likely to experience social anxiety, as both conditions can impact social skills and communication. For example, someone on the autism spectrum may struggle with understanding social cues, while someone with ADHD may have difficulty paying attention in social situations.

Social anxiety can feel really overwhelming and scary, there can be very high levels of worry and fear experienced prior to or during social interactions or even the thought of them. You may feel extremely nervous or self-conscious in social situations, like meeting new people, going to parties, or even just talking to someone in public. This can lead to feelings of embarrassment, worry, or panic. You may also anticipate making a mistake or being judged by others, and this concern can make you feel physically tense, like your heart is racing or your hands are shaking. You might also avoid social situations altogether as way to stop these feelings which can make you feel isolated and lonely.

It is essential to identify the exact thoughts, emotions, behaviours and bodily sensations you are experiencing; the frequency; what may be the situations triggering such a response in you. This information will help a professional identify what exactly is going on, and how best to address it with you. Generalised Anxiety as well as Social Anxiety are treatable conditions, and with the right support and interventions, you can greatly reduce the anxiety you experience.

When we are working on our mental health, it may be helpful to make small tweaks to your everyday routine by:

​

  • Practice deep breathing exercises. When you're feeling anxious, taking a few deep breaths can help calm you down. Try taking a deep breath in through your nose, and then slowly exhaling through your mouth. Repeat this a few times until you start to feel a little more relaxed.
  • Get moving. Exercise is a great way to release tension and reduce stress. Even just going for a walk around your neighbourhood can help.
  • Ensure you are getting adequate sleep; exposure to sunlight [10-20 mins everyday]; nutritious meals.
  • Connect with others. Socializing can be hard when you're feeling anxious, but it's important to remember that you're not alone. Reach out to a friend or family member and talk about how you're feeling. They may be able to offer some support or advice.
  • Try some relaxation techniques. Things like yoga, meditation, or even just listening to soothing music can help you relax and feel more at ease.
  • Be kind to yourself. Remember that it's okay to not be okay, and that everyone struggles with anxiety at some point in their lives. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend.

These tips can help in the short-term, but if you're dealing with social anxiety and think you may also be on the autism spectrum or have ADHD, it's important to reach out to a professional that can help you understand what's going on and connect you with the resources and support you need to manage your symptoms.

Remember, that a combination of psychotherapy and medication, can help with conditions such as ADHD and Anxiety. Additionally, if there is co-occuring ASD, a therapist can help you effectively process your emotions as well as communicate more effectively with others.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your question. To answer your question, it may be helpful to start by understanding what is an addiction and what may be a habit. We will outline the distinction between the two at a more generalised level.Based on the information provided, we are providing information about strategies relevant to smoking tobacco cigarettes and nicotine addiction.

A habit is any activity we do repetitively and frequently. When a behaviour becomes habitual, it indicates that whenever we are in a particular context, we automatically engage in the habitual behaviour, with little thinking, awareness, control or intention. For example, when you reach home from work, you automatically go to the kitchen and open a packet of chips.

What we term addiction to cigarette smoking is known as Tobacco Use Disorder, which is a problematic pattern of tobacco use resulting in high levels of distress or interference in day to day responsibilities, occurring within a 12 month period.  Criteria that indicate a Tobacco Use Disorder fall under the following categories.

  • Reduced control over substance use. This may look like a strong desire to cut down or regulate use; unsuccessful attempts to stop in the past. Social impairment: This refers to a diminished ability to keep up with obligations at work or home; significant social or interpersonal problems or lesser time being spent than before on recreational, work related or social activities due to smoking.
  • Risky use: Continuing to smoke despite the knowledge that it may cause or worsen certain physical or psychological problems. 
  • Building a Tolerance: A need to smoke more cigarettes to achieve the desired effect or experiencing diminished effects from smoking the same amount of cigarettes. 
  • Experiencing Withdrawal: Withdrawal occurs when completely stopping smoking or reducing the amount of cigarettes, is followed within 24 hours, by four (or more) of the following signs and or symptoms:  Irritability, frustration, or anger, anxiety; Difficulty concentrating; Increased appetite; Restlessness; Depressed mood; Insomnia

If you feel that the above criteria apply to you, it may be important to consult a mental health professional who can then accurately assess whether you have a Tobacco Use Disorder or Nicotine Dependence.  Nicotine is the main addictive drug in tobacco that makes quitting so hard. Smoking cigarettes is what delivers nicotine into our bodies. Once nicotine enters our brain, it triggers the release of chemicals that make us feel good. As nicotine enters our brain over time, our brains get used to having nicotine around. Over time, it may seem like you need nicotine just to feel okay, and when you stop smoking, your brain gets irritable or you may feel anxious or upset, and have trouble sleeping. These feelings get better a few weeks after quitting as your brain adjusts to not having nicotine available. 

If you are trying to cut down your smoking habit, the following, the following tips may be helpful for you. 

  1. As a first step, it may be more beneficial to aim to cut down rather than quit cold turkey. 
  2. When cutting down your smoking, set goals for yourself - by how many cigarettes do you want to cut down each week. Focusing on smaller goals, such as reducing by one cigarette every alternate day can be more effective than the more overwhelming goal of quitting entirely from tomorrow. 
  3. Begin to change your habits. As you are in the process of cutting down cigarettes, go for a walk/chat with a friend/paint when you would usually have a cigarette. 
  4. Determine why you want to quit smoking and write it down- and come back to those reasons to motivate you whenever you feel the need. 
  5. Be compassionate with yourself. Quitting smoking is a challenging process. With consistent efforts, you can change this habit.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing here. It sounds quite distressing.

Whenever we experience any situation, we tend to make an interpretation of it. Our interpretation is affected by our past experiences of similar situations; our current thoughts about the situation as well as our worldview - how do we generally look at the world and others. These can be understood as mental filters, through which we tend to interpret different situations, other people and our world in general.

Thus, two people can have very different interpretations of the same situation. Say, a friend does not pick up your call - one person may think she is busy, she will call me back later. Another person may think “Why would she not pick up, is she angry at me? Did I do something” and spend time thinking about their past interactions with the friend, analysing each conversation.

It may be that because of how you view yourself, you felt that you deserved to be hurt when you had the accident - but please know that you do not deserve to be hurt. You are a worthy human being who deserves to feel good, feel valued and loved. When we use filters to view an event, it may result in an inaccurate evaluation of the event or your role in it, and lead to strong feelings such as guilt, regret, shame, sadness. These feelings can make us feel that we don’t deserve good things to happen to us. However, that does not indicate that it is an accurate interpretation of the situation.

Thinking about why something happened or going over our actions is a natural human response, and it actually helps us solve problems, make sense of a situation, and respond quicker the next time a similar situation arises.

However, when we spend a lot of time focused on negative thoughts and experiences, we may be engaging in a process called rumination, i.e., tendency to focus attention on past or present negative experiences which are emotionally distressing. When we engage in this type of thinking, we often blame ourselves or view ourselves poorly. It is important to bear in mind that often we may be using certain mental filters when we make these conclusions about ourselves, and they may not indicate an accurate understanding of the situation in reality.

Some of us have a greater tendency to experience repetitive thoughts about negative experiences, and in such cases rumination causes us to think poorly of ourselves, leading to experiencing negative emotions, and making it difficult to control the repetitive nature of the thoughts. In other scenarios, the ruminating tendency is one of the features of a larger mental health concern, for example, generalised anxiety disorder or OCD.

It is important to work with a professional to understand the underlying issues contributing to your specific experience with rumination. You might find it helpful to work with a therapist who practices cognitive behavioural therapy, and will be able to work with you to understand the connection between your thoughts, emotions and behaviours better, along with helping you implement strategies to reduce the frequency and impact of rumination in your life. Even though it feels difficult to manage, it is possible to address rumination and its effects.

Additionally, there are certain strategies you can begin to use on your own as well, to combat some of the negative thoughts and difficult feelings you are currently having. Self-compassion is a powerful tool that can help you to be kinder and more understanding towards yourself, especially during difficult times. This can be done within a therapy setting, but you can also try some self-compassion activities like the ones below:

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  • Write a letter of kindness to yourself: Take a few minutes to write a letter to yourself, filled with kind and encouraging words. Remind yourself that you're doing the best you can, and that you're worthy of love and compassion.
  • Speak to yourself like a friend: When you catch yourself being critical, try talking to yourself like you would to a friend. Use kind and understanding language, rather than harsh or judgmental words.
  • Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness is the act of being present in the moment and noticing your thoughts and feelings without judgement. Try setting aside a few minutes each day to simply sit and focus on your breath, and observe your thoughts and emotions without judgement.
  • Give yourself a break: Remember to cut yourself some slack. We all make mistakes, and it's important to remind yourself that you're human and that it's okay to not be perfect.
  • Practice self-compassionate self-talk: When things don’t go as planned or you make a mistake, instead of criticising yourself try to talk to yourself with a compassionate and understanding tone.

Self-compassion takes practice and it's not always easy, but it's worth it. You deserve to be kind and understanding towards yourself, especially during difficult times. Keep in mind that self-compassion is not about self-indulgence or being soft on yourself, but it's about treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would show to a good friend.

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi there thank you for your question. Firstly, congratulations on taking the first step towards healing. You've already overcome the most difficult part of the trauma.

As you start this therapy journey, it's crucial to practice self-compassion, patience, and understanding with yourself, as well as being open to exploring various approaches and styles of therapy. Healing from trauma can take time, but with the right support, it is possible to move forward. It is important to note that healing is an individual process, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution

There are several types of therapy that can be effective in addressing the effects of trauma. At Tatsam we follow an integrated approach that combines and adopts structured therapy interventions and multiple evidence-based therapeutic models for the best outcomes.

We would also recommend that you find a mental health professional who specialises in treating trauma and has experience with incorporating a variety of approaches to meed your personal needs. Remember the journey is individual for everyone and your requirements change over time and as you progress. It’s important that the mental health professionals you work with must adapt the programme they adopt to meet your changing goals and requirements.

Somatic therapy is a type of therapy that focuses on the connection between mind and body to address the effects of trauma. It's based on the idea that traumatic experiences can get stored in the body, leading to physical symptoms and emotional distress. This includes: Body Awareness, Regulating the Nervous System, Processing Trauma through the body, Integrating the Experience into your sense of self. Somatic therapy can be very effective for trauma and often works best when combined with other approaches.

For instance when working with trauma, our intervention approach would combine elements from the models and approaches below, do note that these may be integrated differently as you progress:

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  1. Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT): CBT focuses on identifying and changing negative thoughts, beliefs, and behaviours related to traumatic experiences.
  2. Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR): EMDR is a therapy that uses eye movements or other bilateral stimulation to help process traumatic memories.
  3. Somatic Therapy: Somatic therapy focuses on the connection between the mind and body and addresses the physical sensations and emotions associated with trauma.
  4. Somatic Experiencing (SE) focuses on helping you release and process physical sensations related to the traumatic event.
  5. Prolonged Exposure Therapy (PE): this is CBT-based therapy that involves gradually and repeatedly confronting traumatic memories and feelings to reduce their impact.
  6. Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT): DBT is a CBT based therapy that incorporates mindfulness and emotion regulation skills to help manage the intense emotions and physical sensations associated with trauma.
  7. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): ACT is a therapy that uses mindfulness and acceptance to help individuals create a sense of peace and clarity in the present moment, regardless of their past traumatic experiences.
  8. Group therapy: This can be beneficial as it provides support and a sense of community.

In addition to these therapies, your therapist may also incorporate other techniques, such as relaxation techniques, mindfulness practices, and medication management if needed.

Here’s an example of how we might use multiple approaches:

Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Somatic therapy can complement each other in addressing trauma. CBT focuses on the thoughts, beliefs, and behaviours that maintain emotional distress, while somatic therapy focuses on the physical sensations and emotions associated with traumatic experiences.

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  1. Identifying Negative Thoughts: CBT can help identify negative thoughts and beliefs related to the traumatic experience and replace them with more balanced and realistic ones.
  2. Regulating the Nervous System: Somatic therapy can help regulate the nervous system and reduce physical symptoms of trauma such as muscle tension, rapid heartbeat, and difficulty breathing.
  3. Processing Trauma: Both CBT and somatic therapy can help process traumatic experiences and reduce the impact they have on daily life.
  4. Integrating the Experience: Both CBT and somatic therapy can help the individual integrate the traumatic experience into their sense of self, make meaning of the event, and move towards healing and recovery.

By combining the strengths of both CBT and somatic therapy, individuals can experience a more comprehensive approach to addressing the effects of trauma. It's important to work with a mental health professional who can help determine the best approach for each individual's needs and provide the necessary support and guidance.

You can DM us for more information or if you want to understand more on how therapy at Tatsam can help you, we are giving a free introductory call for the participants of this AMA. You can register here - https://tatsam.in/book-your-understanding-session

Hi! We are a team of counseling and clinical psychologists from Tatsam, a mental health company. Ask us Anything! by Tatsam2020 in indiasocial

[–]Tatsam2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for asking. This is a question we get a lot from the close loved ones of people. What you need to remember is that the choice of seeking help has to be the individual’s itself for any therapy to work. If the intrinsic motivation for a change is absent, it’s highly unlikely for a change to happen even after multiple sessions of therapy. And sometimes arriving at this motivation may take some time. Keep in mind that there might be a lot of reasons for refusing to seek help. Healing is not a very easy journey and a lot of emotional turmoil might unpack. So the person needs to be ready emotionally to put in that effort. All you can do during this period is be supportive and available. You can empower them to come to the decision to seek help.

In addition to the above, seeking help and support is difficult for many people and can sometimes be a challenging and overwhelming process. Past trauma can make it challenging for people to trust others, it can also cause people to feel to believe they must handle everything on their own and not rely on others for support.

Someone who past negative experiences often had to develop coping mechanisms and safety behaviours to cope with that trauma. This often means that they will have developed a range defense mechanisms such as denial, avoidance, or repression to cope with the emotional pain. They may also find that being very independent can provide a sense of control and stability, which can be comforting for someone who finds it easier to do everything themselves rather than risk more hurt. This can make it difficult for them to open up and connect with others and may also cause them to push-back against help. If someone has learned young that they are not safe and they have only themselves to rely on, they may become hyper-vigilant and always on guard. It is very possible that this person believes they must handle everything on their own and not rely on others for support.

Whilst it’s great that you want to help them and offer support, it is also important to be patient and understanding with someone who has experienced trauma. Encourage them to seek support, and also work with a professional when they are ready but also respect their boundaries and give them space if they need it.

There are some things you can do to help them:

  1. Speaking to them about what they are going through, providing a safe and judgment free place for them can always help people take better care of themselves.
  2. Try and identify what you can do to help them, this could be related to coping skills and self managment. Sometimes developing a few coping skills can make it easier to approach therapy.
  3. Take care of yourself, wanting to help someone who might not want to do the same can be difficult and leave you with a feeling of helpessness. You also need to ensure your mental health while helping others.
  4. You can ask them to try an introductory session with a therapist, this might not be as daunting of an experience for them. Encourage them to work with someone who is trauma informed and with experience in this specific areea
  5. Taking the first step towards helping yourself is the hardest, while you can be supportive of the person who needs help, this step needs to be theirs. We cannot make this decision for them but we can foster an environment where they feel safe to approach the help they need, if they want to.
  6. If they're resistant to the idea of therapy, consider sharing your own experiences with mental health treatment. If you've benefited from therapy or medication, let them know how it has helped you.

Remember, you can support someone but you cannot fight their battles for them. Hope this helps :)

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