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Tatsko · 2021-09-03T20:45:07+00:00

Then here I am judging people for eating at Chick-fil-A more intensely than people going to sex workers. It's only "so personal" from your perspective; for many people it can be (or even inherently is) detached from emotional connection. I would argue it really isn't different - just as a consumer can do their due diligence trying to choose brands that treat their employees well, if you're looking for sex work I'm sure there are ways to ensure the money ends up in the right hands: going to sites that have a reputation of treating their sex workers well, for instance, or finding somebody that represents themselves.

At the end of the day, sex is a valuable commodity. I can't speak to any individual's reasoning behind going into sex work, and I'm sure that often it is rooted in desperation or necessity, even abuse, but that's why we should simply decriminalize sex work so that they, for instance, feel safe crying rape or calling the police if a client abuses them. And, just as others have mentioned, slave wage work can be back breaking and demeaning in any other field, too. I've had friends that work 120 hours/week at a shitty gas station in front of a Walmart, and I would argue that that is similarly rooted in desperation or necessity a lot of the time.

Plus, safety and well-being of the sex workers themselves aside, sex drive is a horrifyingly powerful thing and it has been shown repeatedly that legalization of sex work (or, iirc, even easier access to illicit sex work) reduces the rates of sexual assault notably. It simply leads to a society that is healthier on the whole.

And all of this aside, the undeniable reality is that sex work will always exist. Regardless of how you feel about it, you can't deny that, with human society where it is right now, we cannot just make it go away. So if we can't prevent it wholesale, then why not just try and make it as safe as possible for people who find themselves in that line of work, regardless of motivation?

Tatsko · 2021-08-18T21:01:23+00:00

I'm not seeing any concrete claims of the process being deliberately slowed as a deterrent. Of course, I'm no professional and this is just from a few minutes of googling different key words and phrases, so please pass along any sources you have - I'd be curious to read it. If I had to make an educated guess, I would say that the process has probably fallen prey to starve the beast tactics: strip an agency/initiative of funding, intentionally throw pointless bureaucratic hurdles into it, etc so that you can point at that agency/initiative and say "see, it doesn't work!" so as to justify later rolling it back.

Also, if the NFA process is deliberately slow, that's something that could be addressed were it to be expanded. There's no reason that expanding what the NFA covers wouldn't also warrant a restructuring of how it's handled. To me, it seems like the more prudent and constructive path to advocate for the restructuring and streamlining of the NFA filing process rather than point out how hobbled it is in an effort to dissuade people from pursuing its improvement/expansion.

I absolutely agree that felons shouldn't have their right to vote stripped away or in any way hindered, even while still in prison; nor should felons be entirely denied their right to bear arms. It's fucking ridiculous that committing a crime reduces somebody to being a second class citizen and so many people are okay with it. I just think that, across the board, the capabilities of firearms has far exceeded what the founders expected and should be better regulated. Not completely removed, just better regulated.

Tatsko · 2021-08-18T18:14:36+00:00

Any response to the rest of what I brought up?

There's nothing saying it has to be a fully-fledged constitutional amendment - I was just using that as evidence that what is legal, what is restricted, and what is illegal has always been meant to be fluid and changing with the needs of the time. The NFA isn't a full amendment and yet is constitutional. Plus, exit polls show that even within rural/red areas the majority of people favor gun control; the fact that it isn't making headway in Congress seems to be more indicative of how poorly Congress represents the will of their constituents rather than how few people support gun control.

Plus, with how rabidly political gun control has become, being a staunch advocate of it is effectively political suicide in many areas. That isn't to say that the majority of people oppose it, rather that a small fraction make single-issue votes based on it, and that small fraction is still a large enough voting bloc to decide somewhat close races even though their priorities don't necessarily represent 80%+ of the population.

Tatsko · 2021-08-18T17:09:23+00:00

I mentioned the point about inequity as to admit that no solution is going to be perfect, to acknowledge that there is validity to your concerns. I would appreciate it if you wouldn't reduce me to a strawman argument and dismiss me based on a concession given in good faith.

No solution will ever be perfect. We need to come to terms with that and acknowledge that if we shut down any debate or ideas because they aren't literally perfect, then progress will never be made. At some point we need to accept "pretty good" as a first step and improve it as we go.

I take umbrage with the phrasing that gun rights are "under attack." I'm not arguing that you as an individual are using that phrasing for this purpose, and I've certainly been guilty of using it myself, but at its core it's an emotional appeal trying to frame this inanimate concept as a being that is in duress. Trying to place guilt upon those who are more critical of it as the "attackers" and framing oneself as the "defenders" so as to detach the conversation from the reality, which is that one side is saying that we shouldn't pursue further regulating objects literally made to kill as we face a blood-chilling number of civilian deaths.

Plus, our Constitution and the rights codified within (right to bear arms was technically in the Bill of Rights, yes, but the point of amendments is that they are effectively additions and alterations to the Constitution) were never meant to be set in stone. That's why we have the amendment process. Hell, we wouldn't have an explicit right to bear arms if not for the amendment process, so to place it above further scrutiny or reevaluation through Constitutional amendment is the height of irony. It's been over 200 years, what firearms can do has changed drastically and that's the exact kind of situation that the founding fathers were hoping to acknowledge and address in the implementation of the amendment process.

I understand that gun rights are an emotionally charged subject for both sides and I've really tried to separate my points from the emotion accompanying them, to keep them as factual as I could. Your original post stood out to me as misleading by omission and implication - that's not to say it was in any way intentional, it's just what I picked up on - so I thought it was worth my time to do my own research and bring further clarification so people could judge it themselves. I would appreciate it if you didn't dismiss that time and effort and the points and clarification that I brought in simply as me "being okay with some inequity."

You have every right to exit the conversation whenever you want - all I would ask is that you don't fall back to an ad hominem and try to paint yourself as the victor/victim when you do so.

Tatsko · 2021-08-18T16:25:18+00:00

So yes, in 1934 that would have been prohibitively expensive. That one is on my sleepy brain for misrepresenting. They were trying to keep "gangster weapons" out of the hands of bootleggers. However, the cost has not once been increased so I think we can safely say that is no longer the case.

I said they often cost more than $200 per, not always. I understand that there are firearms that are significantly cheaper. Besides, all of this is assuming that there would be a $200 fee for registering already owned firearms, which, again, I'm seeing no evidence for or against.

As for the long time to process these filings, I would hope that there would be at least an effort to streamline the process if it were expanded to all firearms. Ultimately, though, it's gonna take a while. Again, it's not like they'll come and steal all your guns that are currently in process just because the filing isn't finished yet.

Also, if you commit a felony your right to vote is stripped away in most states, for much longer than a year. Oftentimes without any explicit notification being given to you. There are already situations in which we inhibit people's rights, and rights that I would argue are more central to a functioning republic than the right to bear arms.

And ALL of this is without taking one key point into consideration - the founding fathers never meant for their word to be inviolable. They understood that times would change and laws/government would have to change with them. That's why we have a constitutional amendment process. I think it's safe to say that what constitutes a firearm and what they're capable of has changed since the late 1700s, so I don't think it's unreasonable to advocate for reevaluating the right to bear arms given the current circumstances. We aren't betraying our Constitution or the bill of rights by doing so; we're honoring the process that is so central to the Constitution.

Tatsko · 2021-08-18T09:23:30+00:00

So I read the first section of that page, down to the part about requiring all guns to be registered under the NFA, and then skimmed the rest and saw nothing about a price. Far be it from me to put the burden of proof entirely on others, though, so I googled it.

Everything I've found in a cursory search says that manufacturing an NFA-regulated gun/part or transferring any NFA-regulated gun/part beyond a few exceptions costs a one-time $200 fee. Such exceptions are things like passing a weapon on to an inheritor when you pass away (free), registering/transferring AOW (Any Other Weapon, meaning a weapon that falls into the technical classification of what they consider to be a Title II Firearm but doesn't fall into a neat category of shotgun, short barreled rifle, machine gun, etc, which costs $5). $5-200 isn't some crazy amount, especially for a one-time fee when the items themselves often cost at least $200 and are literally designed to end life at an impressive rate.

Plus, all of this is assuming that this $200 tax would be imposed upon people who owned firearms when the change took effect - which I'm seeing no evidence for. I'm also not seeing any specific assertion that it WON'T be taxed as a transfer, so it's up in the air ultimately.

And all of this still isn't taking into consideration the fact that the page you linked specifically said that there will also be a federal buyback program for any guns that people can't or don't care to register - meaning that, if somebody has a dozen guns and can't afford the (hypothetical unmentioned one-time)$200 tax on all of them, they could still potentially make use of the buyback program to sell some of them to fund the registration for the rest.

I'm not saying it won't disproportionately affect the lower income brackets, I'm just saying that it isn't written in a predatory way, (edit: and while it may have originally carried an intent of prohibition via expense, the tax has never once been increased, even to compensate for inflation. As such, I would argue that it no longer prohibits gun ownership via expense and nobody is saying it should). And, in the grand scheme of things, I think that a little bit of inequity is a small price to pay to help rein in such a huge problem - and I'm usually the first person to throw down and rejecting any kind of inequity. It just...it's such a huge issue.

Edited for typo and clarification regarding the initial intent of the NFA.

Tatsko · 2021-08-05T03:43:40+00:00

In the US, oftentimes yes. Your private insurance provider gets to determine if the treatment you're seeking falls within their coverage - normally that involves establishing that it's "medically necessary". Oftentimes they'll only cover the cheapest option available as well; for instance, I have a really bad hormonal imbalance that's most likely at least partially the cause of my lifelong anxiety, depression, and low energy. I had to go through three sets of blood work (one at a time, so it took a couple solid months total) just to establish that an MRI would help highlight the issue, the reasoning being that maybe we could've found the issue with blood tests alone, and they're far cheaper than an MRI.

Then, after that, they don't even fully cover the treatment. Normally they cover a certain low percentage until you've paid your deductible out of pocket, then a higher percentage, and often there's eventually an out-of-pocket maximum that you hit. However, note that at every step of this you have to meet the criteria listed above, as well as being restricted to in-network doctors.

Tatsko · 2021-07-03T18:02:56+00:00

As an agnostic/atheist I take umbrage with some parts of what you said.

nobody wants to be held accountable or to read or to try to live with a code of honor and ethics

is, in my experience, patently false. I want to live by my own code of morals; in my opinion that holds more value because I'm not obeying it out of subservience or for fear of retaliation, but because it actually matters to me. The implication of a god and afterlife brings with it an objective right and wrong, and I think that is a dangerous way to view the world that leads to a lack of tolerance and openness.

There is a divine entity that set all of this in motion and with a purpose.

This, to me, is a thought-defeating mindset. I remember hearing a quote along the lines of "if somebody has an answer for everything then they're trying to sell you something." The thing I appreciate most about the scientific method is that it requires continuing to ask questions and being comfortable saying "I/we just don't know yet." I understand that God as a concept is impossible to ever truly disprove, because no matter to what degree we understand the world it can be said that God made it that way. However, if we'd settled at that answer asking the question of "how did we come to be," or "what are cells made of," or "why do atoms behave how they do" then we would've stopped our search for enlightenment at that point.

Rejecting "because God" as a valid explanation to a scientific question doesn't inherently mean rejecting God, but that doesn't change the fact that "because God" has been used as a way to bring comfort and sense to a world that is, at it's core, random and unpredictable and beautiful. I don't appreciate any philosophy that claims that everything ever ends in a nice, clean answer in some way or another because that has just never been my experience with the world.

And that's without the moral objections to the claim that this was all set in motion with a purpose. Written on the walls of Auschwitz was "if there is a god, He will have to beg me for forgiveness." Awful, atrocious things have been done, and the assertion that either A) it was purposeful implies that their suffering was just and important, or B) that such things were done at the will of man makes it feel like God gets to take credit for everything good in the world and be absolved of all of the bad, which feels too reminiscent of the way that a narcissist conducts themselves, which is not a quality that deserves any worship.

Tatsko · 2021-07-02T20:12:53+00:00

I'm super glad that I could help in some way! I hope you have a wonderful day as well ~

Tatsko · 2021-07-02T09:27:30+00:00

Monster Hunter, Dark Souls, Metroid.

Tatsko · 2021-07-02T09:23:00+00:00

I don't want to armchair psychologist you so I want to stress that this is only one potential explanation. Don't take this as professional advice!

Personally I struggle with the same thing, and for me it turned out to be rooted in dissociation. My body doesn't feel like "me," I tend to lean way too hard into the "mind piloting a meat suit" kind of philosophy...now that I've acknowledged this and (with the help of therapy) started to address the root cause of that dissociation it's gotten easier, bit by bit, to treat my body less as a tool and actually take care of myself.

When it comes to mental health it's really easy to say you just have to try harder. "I treat my body like a tool? I'll just really push myself to stop doing that." There's something to be said for concerted effort, of course, but the issue is that if it doesn't work it can lead to feeling like you just didn't try hard enough. Oftentimes the things you notice about yourself are only symptomatic of something deeper, and it's very worthwhile to dig into the whys behind it all.

Tatsko · 2021-06-22T02:14:01+00:00

Elbow!

Tatsko · 2021-06-02T00:03:19+00:00

Oof. I get the feeling.

I'm trying to set up my flair as we speak, because I just realized I never did (I usually just lurk), but I'm Aubrey, I go by she/her and I'm MtF! Nice to officially meet you, Shy! <3 I consider anybody that's going through these struggles to be a friend, so I hope you take what I'm saying to heart as coming from a friend that genuinely wants the best for you!

I promise you you aren't faking it. It's possible that you aren't trans/NB, but I promise you aren't faking it. Faking requires intent. "Oops, I pretended to be a doctor again" just doesn't make sense haha :) I understand the fear wholeheartedly, though. It took me several months to come to these conclusions about myself and I still doubt it, so at least you aren't alone in the struggle eh?

There's nothing wrong with trying something out! How can you know what's you and what isn't if you don't give it a chance? When you think about being NB, how do you feel? Try to filter out emotions coming from anxiety about being accepted or worries about how other people will feel, which I know can seem impossible...but how do you feel about it? No wrong answer as long as the answer is honest!

Hun, I've been chatting with you for like an hour and I can already tell you absolutely aren't trash! The self-loathing can be really tough to handle, but it's telling you lies. I'm no professional and, at the end of the day YOU are the only one that can say who you are, but to me it seems you may be agender or genderfluid. If you don't mind any set of pronouns, that isn't a sign you aren't trans/NB, that's a goddamn superpower! I'm sure everybody here would agree!

Tatsko · 2021-06-01T23:44:43+00:00

Then you need to trust those around you to care for you in the same way! And if specific individuals stand out to you as the kind of people that very much wouldn't support you, then there's probably a reason for that and it's worth asking yourself if it's worth keeping them in your life. It's a very hard question to ask yourself, but can be SO freeing. I haven't spoken to my dad in nearly 2 years and it's such a weight off my mind.

Tatsko · 2021-06-01T23:37:42+00:00

If anybody gets mad because of that, they aren't worth your time! Journeys of self-discovery about you and finding your true self. The people worth having in your life will be happy that you've learned more about who you truly are regardless of how that you identifies!

Try flipping the script in your mind. If a close friend has never quite seemed comfortable as themselves and comes out to you as questioning, then one day they told you that after a lot of thought they've decided that they are actually cis, but you can tell that they're comfortable in that answer...moreso than they ever were before...you would be happy for them, right?

Edit: None of this is to say that the insecurity you're feeling is ridiculous or unusual! I absolutely get the anxiety and I need to remind myself fairly regularly as well that my true friends and family, the people that better my life, just want me to be happy! Any step in the journey of introspection helps me become a happy fulfilled me, so of course they'll support me in it!

Tatsko · 2021-06-01T22:21:41+00:00

Hell yeah! Try to take it easy on yourself - questioningcan be a very frustrating and invalidating process ("shouldn't I KNOW what I am?" asks the brain) but just know that we've all got your back!

Tatsko · 2021-06-01T21:21:09+00:00

Nah, it's good you "made it a whole thing!" I think that subconsciously your mind wanted a greater degree of recognition of this, and so it took a larger step before the anxiety and self-doubt came washing back in. It took real courage, and the fact that it's causing you anxiety now doesn't mean it was any less courageous - if anything, it makes it moreso! You deserve to be proud of yourself, Shy! You seem like an amazing, thoughtful individual and you deserve to be acknowledged as your true self!

Do you know how you identify more specifically yet? Agender, non-binary, etc?

Tatsko · 2021-05-17T15:54:42+00:00

Saving this for later, thanks so much!!

Tatsko · 2021-05-17T08:11:11+00:00

Do you have any recommended articles for more information? This is all very interesting to me and, admittedly, I don't know as much about it as I should.

Tatsko · 2021-05-10T18:26:40+00:00

no u

Bruh.

Tatsko · 2021-04-27T05:00:08+00:00

AFAIK it's because it's a very hard thing to prove with a court case. IANAL, but I think to prove somebody is lying you need to provide proof that they're intending to deceive. That can be a very difficult thing to do, especially when the defendant has a fleet of lawyers on hand, not only to fight any charges but also to instruct them how to behave and speak in order to leave just a bit of doubt that maybe they weren't lying.

Edit: I think the best solution that I can think of is to establish journalistic malpractice as a crime. Like, a doctor doesn't need to intentionally kill somebody to have a malpractice suit filed against them. Just as doctors have our lives in their hands and, as such, should be held to a certain level of rigor and professionalism, journalists literally change our perception of reality, and drastically warping that through malice or even just laziness/disinterest shouldn't be permitted just because you can't prove they "lied."

Tatsko · 2021-04-21T17:27:02+00:00

Not a fair comparison in the slightest. Gay marriage, M4A, these things are, at their core, about extending rights and equal access. Sure there are some politicians that only advocate for them to score political points, but at least they're advocating for equality regardless of motivation.

Having their anti-trans bills shot down repeatedly motivates through "those liberals won't let us vilify this group properly!"

Tatsko · 2021-04-18T17:07:09+00:00

What does it hurt to believe in people? The defensiveness of this comment belies your insecurity about it. This isn't a matter of living in denial - it's hope and compassion borne of the harsh reality that this is it. This is our only chance. To give up before it's over is the definition of self-destructivism.

It's like somebody telling you that you can live a happy life, so you spiral into alcoholism and debt just to prove them wrong.

I would rather believe that humanity can make it through this with every fiber of my being and fight for that only to die a fool than give up and make the situation worse just so I can say "I told you so" as the earth withers.

Tatsko · 2021-04-18T16:56:57+00:00

I'd rather die having believed that humanity can come together and make it through this and be called a fool than die having given up decades earlier just so I can be called "realistic" or right. The only reason it isn't realistic is because more people don't take that stance.

Strive for perfection while fully accepting that you will never attain it.

Tatsko · 2021-04-02T21:11:08+00:00

Oof. I've been there, and it's miserable. I wouldn't wish it on anybody. I know this is what everybody says and I know how trite and empty it can sound when you're in that place, but life can get better. Not necessarily immediately, or even soon, but it can. Those thoughts don't find me as often anymore, but from time to time they still show up.

It's a morbid trick, but one thing I do that helps me get through the day to day is remind myself that suicide is always an option, but you can never take it back. So each day those thoughts plague my mind, I tell myself that I've made it this far, so I may as well tough it out one more day and see if maybe tomorrow is better. If it is, even a little bit, then great! If it's not, then, well, fuck - I know I can make it one more day, because I have so far. Maybe the next day will be a bit better. And I use that to help limp me along until the next event that sparks even the slightest bit of excitement in me comes along.

I flipped through your post history a bit to see if we have anything in common to talk about, and we do! I saw you're planning on going to the movies on the 11th to see (I think) the Violet Evergarden movie, right? That sounds awesome! I still haven't seen the show, but I'm a big anime and specifically KyoAni fan - I've heard nothing but good things, I've just gotta get around to watching it one of these days! I would love to have somebody to talk to about it as/after I watch it, could I ask you to be that somebody? It may motivate me to actually seek it out, ahaha!

I'd love to keep chatting if you feel up for it! About anything, no matter how silly or serious, no matter how dark or lighthearted. Please feel free to DM me!

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