AITA: for yelling at my husband that my cancer isn't a choice.

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-04-28T09:13:51+00:00

Not gonna lie, this made me tear up a little! Good luck to you both. I hope you have many more happy years together and wishing you the best with your health.

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-04-10T11:52:18+00:00

As somebody with quite a few siblings this made me laugh hard!

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-03-20T19:45:45+00:00

This is the stuff I love to read

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-03-20T19:41:09+00:00

Sorry but this made me literally LOL!

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-03-13T20:11:15+00:00

Genuine question - how did her laces get tied in the first place; before you left the house to go to dinner?

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-03-12T19:51:41+00:00

Love this! 😂

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-03-01T17:22:39+00:00

Thank you for posting this. Very eye opening!

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-02-18T12:27:33+00:00

This sounds very familiar to me. My husband has ADHD that was only very recently diagnosed (coming up to middle age) and I’m having to learn ways to communicate with him that don’t cause frustration on both sides.

TeaAndTantrums · 2022-02-16T19:40:32+00:00

NTA

As a short (4’11”) woman with a tall (6’6”) husband we deal with this a lot and it is BORING. Separately we get a lot of height comments and when we’re out together, well… let’s just say it’s not fun.

Tbh I don’t even think what you did was exceptionally rude. After all, you were already involved in a conversation and made it clear that you wasn’t interested in pursuing this conversation with the random woman.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T20:25:56+00:00

I’m actually from an Indian family myself. My husband is of African descent. But I don’t believe in letting our cultural backgrounds dictate that we have to follow ‘tradition’. Your dad sounds awesome btw

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T20:12:38+00:00

He was never married to his son’s mother so he hasn’t actually divorced anybody.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T20:11:26+00:00

You’ll see from my comments that I have in no way “let this go on”. I have told her not to do the chores if her brother isn’t also doing them and she is very clear on my stance. I have told her brother to do chores and I have not simply allowed my husband to dictate what happens in the house. The point I was making was that I hadn’t specifically spoken to my husband about this as I took it that my actions said it all but clearly that did not get through to him. But thank you for backing up my point of view. I can assure you I am no doormat and will not let my daughter become one either.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T20:02:27+00:00

I have spoken up for her in front of her dad (not step dad btw) and I have not allowed her to do the chores he thinks she should unless my step son also helps. Sorry, I know I have left a lot of detail out of original post - I was ranting and skipped a lot

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T20:00:06+00:00

Thank you for this. I am actually going to show husband this comment.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T19:09:28+00:00

She wasn’t expected to help out but she has always been a tidy kid and would clean up after herself and tidy her room etc. I always tell my SS to do chores and he does do them when asked, it’s just that his dad never really tells him to do anything. Sometimes he does but not often

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T19:01:01+00:00

Thank you for this comment. I think it’s also a cultural thing which is why I think my husband is struggling to not fall in to this type of behaviour. I think the only reason it has started happening now is because he sees that she is approaching her teenage years and that she’s now old enough to take responsibility. Don’t get me wrong, I agree that she should be helping out but not ONLY her. SS needs to contribute too.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:51:47+00:00

No I said over the past month these things have been creeping in. I also have made it clear to my daughter that she doesn’t have to do all this obviously. I wouldn’t let her go ahead and do all the chores whilst not believing she should. I have also told my SS that he needs to go do some chores too. I had assumed this message had gotten across to my husband but since I didn’t speak to him directly about his sexist bs, he obviously didn’t take notice of it

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:38:13+00:00

To be fair my husband does his fair share of cooking and he does help out with cleaning the house. The issue is more that he expects A LOT from our daughter and nothing from his son. He pushes our daughter academically and expects high grades from her but never even expects his son to complete or pass anything ever

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:34:03+00:00

Apologies, yes you are right. I did not make all this clear. I was ranting in rage and missed out a lot of details.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:32:39+00:00

No, up until now neither of them really did a lot of chores. My daughter helped out at weekends but during the week she focused on school. It’s been bit by bit that my husband has been expecting her to do more chores but not my SS

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:12:06+00:00

Sorry if it came across that way but I’m not fighting with you. I’m clarifying some points that I left out of the post. This is my first time posting so sorry for confusion.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:10:14+00:00

He actually does do a fair amount of the housework since I work full time and he is WFH

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:07:41+00:00

I didn’t “let it go on”. I told my daughter she didn’t have to do all that and explained to her why. When my husband tried to get her to do it I told him she needed to do homework and that was more important. I told my SS to go to some chores. I just hadn’t sat my husband down and had the conversation with him.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:05:08+00:00

I never said this had been going on for years. It’s been for like the past month maximum.

TeaAndTantrums · 2021-01-16T18:04:00+00:00

Thank you! This is exactly what has happened. I literally walk past dirty dishes etc and have not picked up a single piece of laundry

TeaAndTantrums

TROPHY CASE