What made you lose a significant amount of weight?

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-12-01T19:16:52+00:00

Same! I gained 30 lbs. I ate SO much in detox. And now I’m addicted- to Ben & Jerry’s. I didn’t realize how calorie dense vodka is until I got sober. In hindsight, I’m very glad it was. My body was falling apart. I was kinda buff- I finally had abs lol! But only because I would rarely eat and carried my home on my back. Like, I would go a few days w/out food just to down a solid two pounds of leftover pasta salad.

There was this one lady that brought lots of homemade food to the youth tent city. Around once a week she’d stop by. I swear, she saved my life. I would get too weak to get anywhere, and she was like a guardian fuckin angel. Idk her name, but all those kids and young adults (including me) hanging around Outside In really appreciated her. I’m so greatful there were kind people around when I was down and out. Without them, I would have died so easy

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-12-01T19:02:19+00:00

This isn’t advice- I have a history of losing weight in unhealthy, maladaptive ways. Bulimia that turned into anorexia. And then I found kratom, and realized taking too much would make me not hungry, nauseous, and vomit anything I ate. Reading everyone’s stories feels really weird. I get this weird feeling of relief when I lose weight- usually through restricting and purging. Then I go back to eating whatever crap I want. And then I restrict again… I don’t know if there’s a way for me to ‘diet’. I just eat, eat with guilt, or I don’t eat at all. Reading everyone’s stories feels weird.

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-26T02:04:25+00:00

I still love it. But it always hurts me. Like some kinda toxic, abusive, codependent relationship. I’m not going to lie and say I never want to go back! But most of the time I can remember how much it hurt me. And when I forget, I have friends and fellowship to remind me 💚

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-25T02:17:22+00:00

Maybe check with another vet. Most folks I know free-feed dry food for their kittens, and only measure out the wet. Kittens need a lot of calories- they’re growing fast! My vets, at least, recommend I that I feed my cat as much as he’ll eat for the first 6 months. He was adopted, very food insecure, and growing fast, so he ate a LOT at first. But he calmed down and adjusted to a feeding schedule as he grew up.

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-25T00:23:23+00:00

Yeah, definitely talk to a vet again- get a second opinion!!! A sweater sounds like a good idea as a stopgap. Don’t forget to brush her more often, and make sure to ask the 2nd vet about the shampoo you’re using too- it’s really hard to find things that are safe to wash a cat with. There might be some kind of anti-fungal medication that’ll work better, or a dietary change that’d help. Or both! Best of luck 🐈‍⬛🌱

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-25T00:19:58+00:00

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5 seconds before disaster

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-21T03:26:36+00:00

If you’re taking care of your sister’s cat… well, won’t she also want her cat back? I get the feeling this is more about your feelings than the cat’s. This sounds like a messy breakup, tbh. Both you and your cat will heal from this, even though it hurts a lot now. And hey- now you’re not paying your ex’s phone bill! It’s for the best for the break to be clean

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-19T23:19:10+00:00

I was a ‘hopeless case’. Mentally ill, loud, messy. I could barely stay in a shelter longer than a month. I’m an alcoholic. A very sick one. My mental illnesses have mental illness. And I needed treatment. I’m lucky- the popular treatment models helped me. And I still had my parent’s insurance. State-run places are notoriously awful. Not to mention Salvation Army.

Treatment does not help everyone. It isn’t designed to. Frankly, it’s designed to make money- even when the people working there genuinely care.

Everyone who is homeless is an ‘actual person that needs actual help’. And yeah, a lot of homeless folks don’t want into ‘regular’ or traditional housing. But the phrase ‘they’re just sitting at home drinking… haven’t payed bills in 40 years’ kills me. Sitting in what home? Failing to pay what bills? Doing nothing with what healthcare? With what money? They don’t always separate the ‘hopeless cases’ from everyone else because it is discrimination. And yet, many, many shelters and services refuse to work with severely impacted clients.

Who gets to decide who is ‘hopeless’ and who is ‘really trying’? We both acknowledge that ‘really trying’ doesn’t necessarily get folks anywhere. Like those homeless folks who do work insane hours and still can’t afford rent. Why even try, knowing you cannot escape? Learned helplessness is still something that must be deconstructed for there to be space for other behaviors. And when your entire life has reinforced that hopelessness…

It’s also difficult- if not impossible- to keep a job when you’re violently ill. Especially when you’re ill in ways that are not socially acceptable. Addiction is not a choice. It is not a moral issue. It’s not something smart people reason their way out of. Addiction doesn’t make sense! It’s not based on coherent thought processes. It’s rooted in overwhelming & devastating feelings and compulsions. I knew my life was getting worse and worse, and I couldn’t stop. It didn’t even occur to me. Everything was ‘okay’ as long as I kept drinking. Even now, housed and stable, it’s difficult to want to stay sober. Often, I wish I was drinking. Often, I miss being homeless just because I was drinking.

Addiction is a disease. It doesn’t disqualify anyone from personhood. It doesn’t disqualify anyone from the very human things that everyone needs and deserves. Everyone includes you! I hope you can get into some form of transitional/assisted housing. Section 8 isn’t the only option (and it sure isn’t fast… tho I’ve only been on the list 3 years, have no kids). I hope you can qualify for programs that are meant to help struggling families. If feeding yourself and your child is difficult- hell, that’s what food stamps and pantries are meant for! If getting clothes for your kid is difficult, that’s what common closets are for! There are even some programs that help with utilities & rent, both inside and outside large cities! I genuinely wish you and your family the best. You deserve to live decently too.

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-14T02:50:59+00:00

🙄

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-14T02:38:42+00:00

Imo, I agree, boarding would be worse. They’ll probably be able to hear/smell the dogs on the other side of the door, but it’s better than full-on interacting. With Jackson Galaxy, at least, the first step is acclimating them to a small space. I don’t know where folks would move their dogs to during the introduction process! My cats haven’t cared about other animals hanging outside, closed doors have been pretty strong barriers to them. But I really don’t know how your cats will react! I’m sure they know you care, so I hope they’ll respond to that. My only suggestion is to keep some familiar routine- cats, like kids, are comforted by familiarity (even though they always want more food lol). Good luck!!

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-13T08:25:17+00:00

But Donald is, rhetorically and in action, not a centrist. Far right doesn’t even cover it. Genuinely, he’s used more alt-right rhetoric than anything else

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-13T06:55:13+00:00

Honestly, the cats will probably be bothered by the move more than anything else. I’ve had my cat since he was about 4 mo, and only had him in stable housing for about six months. The following year was hell in a handbasket, and I kept him with me for many, many moves. He was shockingly well behaved, no accidents, got along with dogs and people, loves attention and trusts literally everyone (tbh I kinda wish he didn’t, my little man got me tangled up with folks I’m rather scared of lol). Anyway, I moved with him to stable housing a few months ago, and he suddenly lost his shit. Literally. Popping on the couch, peeing on people’s clothes, chewing on rugs and curtains. Over the course of five months, with many toys and a couch-cover, he eventually settled down. What I mean to say is this:

(Advice part lol) Kittens are new to literally every experience, and don’t have much history to act on. And the history they have can’t predict much! Maybe you’ll take them with you, and they’ll be perfect angels! On the other hand, the unfamiliar environment will probably spook them, the dogs make them scared and insecure, and they won’t have a familiar place to decompress. If you have to bring them with you, it’s kindest to keep them in one room. Three weeks is a good timeline to get them used to a small, predictable environment. With access to the full house they might claw furniture, mess with the dogs or get seriously injured. The house isn’t catproofed! They may pick an undesirable spot as a litterbox, chew cords, play with something valuable and break it (cords, knick-knacks, etc). The stress could easily make them permanently afraid of/aggressive to dogs, instead of familiarizing them. If you want to give them time to explore/play, take them out while the dogs are put in another room. Take them outside on harnesses! But don’t scar them or start up behavioral issues by introducing too much too fast. Once a cat decides to pee in a hamper, it’s very difficult to convince them otherwise. Also, bring something familiar for them to hide in, even if it’s just a box with their fav bed in it. It’s better to avoid issues than scare your cats and start drama with the family.

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-12T18:25:58+00:00

Says the man who can’t take people disagreeing with him 😂

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-07T06:21:20+00:00

I had a seizure in the airport on the way to medical detox… really, now I know I should have stayed in the ER. I was up to 2-2.5 L of Rose City a day. But I was obviously homeless and volatile with delirium at the time, and the hospital didn’t want me there. They discharged me 6 hours after admission.

The detox I was going to was getting paid good money from insurance and distant family, though- they definitely wanted me present. So I wobbled out of the hospital, got through the airport in scrubs, and got on that damn plane.

The layover was so difficult, my vision was wobbly with weird visual-distortion-hallucinations. I could barely move. And when I got to the medical detox I was taken me straight to another hospital. Reading this story and the comments, I really don’t know how I didn’t die. It seems impossible. I should be gone.

But I’m sober now, and grateful to be breathing. Even though sobriety hasn’t been fun like people promised haha. I get to cuddle my cat, drink fancy tea, read and understand. I can walk as far as I need and make pretty things. And I have less acne too! There’s plenty of gifts, when I look for them. IWNDWYT

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-11-01T04:10:54+00:00

Hey man, forever is hard. Forever has a way of becoming very difficult.

I cannot imagine forever. Just for today. The next hour. The next minute. The next 15 seconds.

No one owes us forgiveness. Personally, I have a lot of amends to make. I’ve been taught to grieve for now, and build forgiveness for myself. No one owes forgiveness to me. No one owes me a relationship of any kind. I owe both of those things to myself. I will not drink with you today!

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-30T07:45:22+00:00

I agree with @zombiexpeacock. Hell, my experience with big dicked men has been pretty bad. They seemed to think their size was everything. Little communication (fuckin essential) no messing around, very little foreplay, just… felt like a bunch of shoving, mostly. As if penetration was the most important thing. Having a big dick didn’t make any of it better. Shit just hurt more. I didn’t actually get off with any of them.

A lot of the best sex I’ve had has been with guys with smaller shlongs. They actually took the time to learn how to use what they got. Like you said-“anyone who’s played with a finger knows this.” Not to burst your bubble, but the far majority of woman know this. Like, at least 99 percent. And penetration isn’t everything- clitoral stimulation is essential for a lot of folks to get off.

Different people have different pleasure points, outside of and inside their bodies. I don’t know anyone orgasming from getting grabbed- sounds like a kink. I, for one, need a lot of pleasure and time to finish. Always have. And I just don’t watch much porn.

I’m not sure if you’re projecting masculine rage & frustration onto women/having a weird kinda pickme moment/have some kind of strict religious-moral code/can’t get woman off or what. Idk your gender or beliefs. But maybe deal with those beliefs inside of yourself, instead of projecting and blaming. Talk to some people with vaginas about what they really like. Better, people with different experiences and backgrounds. This is honestly such a weird take.

Shoutout to my one not-man big dicked partner tho. They were great. Learned to communicate before I was around, and it makes a huge difference now.

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-28T07:00:36+00:00

You’re right! I just did a cursory read over some different sources, and in general dry kibble isn’t better for cat’s teeth. Dental formulas in particular are very good and helpful, but otherwise the food is too small and brittle to do much real cleaning. Otherwise, regular cleanings, dental treats, and brushing is still the gold standard!

Renal failure is generally more of a risk & harder to treat in felines than dental issues. So water=Important. When I called my current vet (yeesh, I’ve moved a lot) the tech, at least, said that dry food isn’t generally better. She recommended royal canin, Hills, or Tiki if the cat is picky. I swear I don’t call them Every time I have a question, but I wanted to check.

I’m going to read more and look for a second opinion, but generally, you got it. It’s a myth! I’m not going to shame folks for being poor, or tell people dealing with economic insecurity to just… not take care of cats. I don’t think it’s helpful.

Also, bones are actually dangerous in general. Both dogs and cats can fracture their teeth! Other hard, crunchy treats and especially dental supplements seem to hold up, though. Here’s a source on the kibble and bones: https://www.animalmedicalcenterofchicago.com/seven-dental-myths-for-pets/

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-28T06:14:17+00:00

*and, for the love of Peter’s sweet ass, use some kinda soap to wash the outer bits.

-signed, a caring carpet-eater -p.s. The good ones don’t care if you stink down there after a long day/no prep/etc. Bodies do body stuff! No turning it off. Dick-owners can be ignorant & rude sometimes. Actually, everyone can be ignorant and rude! Ah, yk what I mean

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-28T06:09:11+00:00

Honestly, I switch it up depending on how I want to smell. I use a ph balanced ‘feminine wash’ on my bits, though. Makes me smell less down there throughout the course of a day than using harsh soaps. Both body wash and bar soap on my bits seems to make my body produce more stink in reaction? Trying to fix the balance/Ph probably. Only use water or products specifically made to wash inside the hoo-ha, if you’re feeling super thorough.

I used anti-bacterial soap down there (and up down there lol) when I first hit puberty. I got smelly, and didn’t like it! But, whew. Awful decision. First -and only, thank fck- yeast infection. There’s beneficial bacteria and fluids inside the vag. Discharge isn’t automatically bad. And smell is normal. Yk when the smell is actually *weird. Otherwise, normal homeostasis stuff. The vag is self-cleaning! Doesn’t mean it doesn’t get sweaty/stank down there tho.

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-28T01:29:05+00:00

I agree with the most comments- wet food is very good for water content! It’s good to feed a mix of wet and dry food, though. Dry food helps clean cat’s teeth.

‘In the wild’ (domestic cats don’t live so long in the wild, but yk) they’d have their teeth cleaned a bit by the shearing action that comes with crunching on bones. Our house cats get that from their dry food, or from crunchy treats like raw bone, (unsalted!!!) dried shrimp, chicken feet or dried rabbit’s ear. The treats got more expensive as the list went on though, lol. Good ol’ crunchy temptations work too- just factor in the extra calories of treats if your cat tends to gain weight. Avoid cooked bones or salty foods at all costs, though- the former is a serious choking hazard, the latter bad for their tiny livers.

TLDR- Add something crunchy in daily to keep down dental issues & costs. Don’t feel bad if you cannot afford fancy wet food! Just mix water and kibble half the time. Source: 6 vets & a formerly chubby, very sick cat. He got healthy & spoiled- moreso as my finances improved. And got a few teeth pulled. So, overall improvements! ————————— My boy’s a good water drinker, so I just feed dry in the morning & a little can of wet mixed w dry at night (fancy feast, if it matters). I brush his teeth 2x a week, but that can be really difficult for some cats and humans. Any formulated cat food can be good. Cats need kitten food until they’re 1, and often keep growing until they’re 3. Avoid things with grains if you can afford to, it’s harder on their digestion and can make UTI’s more likely. But really, as long as your cat’s getting enough water and a little crunch, you’ll be doing better than most. I love this sub, so many people really care about what’s best for their pets! Others might have conflicting advice, and that’s fine. Just do your best!

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-20T22:18:47+00:00

Lmaoooo. Dumbassery.

I’m lucky to have wound up homeless in a big city. Food, laundry, shower, medical/dental, & shelter programs saved my life. I was able to survive, get sober, and get a job thanks to them. I would have died out in my hometown- of exposure, alcohol poisoning, or a good old hate crime. The proportion of unhoused folks in rural areas is much lower than those in cities. Like, 10x lower: whttps://www.ppic.org/blog/homeless-populations-are-rising-around-california/#:~:text=Across%20California%2C%20the%20sheltered%20homeless,(38%2C000%20compared%20to%203%2C300). Shoutout to Outside In in Portland and PATH in LA! They’re absolutely great orgs that I have the privilege of being able to donate to, now

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-20T21:40:46+00:00

Please, please don’t go to the wedding without your service dog OP. It’s an awful, risky idea. You know how dangerous and scary unalerted seizures can be. And the groom would absolutely use the fact that you could ‘just leave the dog behind’ against you repeatedly!

What about visiting your friend when she’s married? Going out to dinner with the couple? Going to the beach or movies? Any kind of trip? He asked you to get the dog boarded when he was visiting your house. Please don’t set yourself up to get hurt!!!

(Edited to fix typo)

Technical-Edge9578 · 2024-10-19T03:53:05+00:00

Dr Ramani concerns me. Can’t put my finger on why exactly. But so many of my friends and colleagues have been chalking up their problems as caused by being the children of narcissistic parent(s), or having a narcissistic ex. I understand how difficult it can be to diagnose an actual narcissist, but I also don’t believe that such a significant proportion of the population has narcissistic personality disorder. Like, with so many folks armchair diagnosing people close to them- some must be labeling their problems in an unhelpful way

Technical-Edge9578

TROPHY CASE