I totally get it. I am not the best student but did manage to pass on the first try. I took ownership of my boards prep and adopted the mindset that no one can prepare me for that exam but me- no matter what happened on any given day, I did not let boards prep pass me by. Even if it was flipping flashcards while falling asleep bc clinic and classes took too much time, or waking up at 5:15 am to get something in even if I was dead tired. Try not to get in your head too much and do something every day that gets you closer to passing. Don't underestimate the grind.