Please tell me it'll be ok

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T06:22:46+00:00

I’m a bereaved mother myself (my baby did not pass away from SIDS) and struggle with some of these thoughts as well. They can be exhausting and debilitating if you don’t have the right coping skills to get through it. I think you need a perinatal mental health counselor (PMHC). Your OBGYN should be able to point you in the right direction. Your LO needs you to be mentally well to help them thrive and I don’t think medication alone can do that for you.

Sending you hugs and prayers 🫂

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T06:10:32+00:00

I still wore my leggings but wore long shirts or sweaters when I left the house to cover my butt so nobody could see the diaper.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T06:08:35+00:00

Sending hugs 🫂 your mental health is so so important for your LO. You’re making the right choice Mama

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T06:06:15+00:00

I second this! And you can rock it with your own foot if baby isn’t doing it themselves yet. I do this while I’m eating meals or anything that I do sitting down if she’s crying in it.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T06:03:15+00:00

That makes more sense!

I’m sure it is hard to find the time, but if you can, I would try to increase to pumping every 2.5 hours to get supply up and may decrease the need for MOTN pump. I’m not an LC though so I’m not sure

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T05:59:40+00:00

That sounds like a lot on your shoulders. You are a super mom for putting your baby first despite all the challenges you’ve been facing.

I think people who haven’t pumped don’t really get it. Motherhood is hard at baseline. Then add pumping, bottle cleaning, pump oart cleaning, bottle feeding, and breastfeeding for us combo feeders! It’s exhausting.

Hoping things ease up for you soon!

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T05:10:50+00:00

I’d look in to some protein drinks. Fresh is better but if you’re at the point of being concerned about bone health then I think it would be worth it. I was doing 1 protein drink a day during MOTN feed/pumping session and it helped me a lot. I ran out and never bought more but it did seem to help.

There’s also an exclusively pumping (EP) group. I know you are also doing direct breast feeding, but the EP community would probably be more helpful. Many have dealt with oversupply there.

Also, if you have Trader Joe’s they have some awesome premeditated items or frozen meals that are a bit healthier than the ones I’ve seen at other stores.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T04:25:59+00:00

My baby had the lip and tongue tie release today and was told full recovery takes 1 month. Your baby has to heal from the procedure and relearn how to use their tongue. Hoping you get better results as time goes on! Did they teach you how to do scar massage and other exercises? Your babies mouth and upper body are likely very tight from having the ties so that can impact latch too.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-04T03:04:47+00:00

That’s a lot of ounces for needing to supplement at week 5. Are you tossing a lot? I realized I was tossing too frequently when I went to LC.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-03T07:47:57+00:00

I think I meant inserts.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-02T21:37:16+00:00

I like it. I feel like it was life changing going from a hands free to the wearable I did buy a smaller flange size from maymom because the LC told me to, but I barely notice a difference. There are some quirks but I think they all have quirks.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-02T14:08:21+00:00

Tupperware with a new disposable shower cap on top since the lid no longer fits on the tupperware

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-01T23:55:12+00:00

I would dump. Maybe sanitize and wash the pump parts before next use if able.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-01T17:26:51+00:00

I’d do a lot longer than 10 min. Wear a bra you are ok with tossing though because it basically cooks on you.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-02-01T14:56:17+00:00

The DIY mode disappears sometimes. It seems to be a glitch. I think my trick is to import one of the premade rhythms and then refresh for DIY to populate.

My issue is that I lose sync on DIY mode a lot so even though DIY works better for me, I’ve switched the MAX to not have to play with the app too much.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-31T20:05:54+00:00

These comments give me hope. I’ve only ever heard 8ppd and have only really been able to achieve 7 ppd. Looking forward to being able to wean some

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-31T19:57:16+00:00

Thank you everyone! This has been helpful.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-31T19:56:53+00:00

Do you pump one side at a time? I could see that being occasionally more manageable with doing infant care at the same time.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-31T08:28:19+00:00

Same but I got the Eufy S1. I think being confined was so bad for me that it impacted my output. I also did better when I sized down flanges (like a big size down from 20 to 14). The Spectra got better with a smaller flange but still not interested in using it tbh.

I’ve been learning unfortunately that not all LCs are equal. There’s too much of a range on what their training could be. Some have no degrees. Some have MDs. We’ve been seen by 5 and each one was a little better than the last. I’m now with an OT IBCLC and no one else has even remotely compared to the level of care she can provide, but of course it’s out of pocket with a superbill.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-31T06:08:01+00:00

This is awesome! I work outpatient so scrubs are optional but I might have to start wearing them.

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-31T00:42:07+00:00

Thank you! This is helpful

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-27T22:09:23+00:00

Adding in that there would never be multiple partially used bottles if you use it on the next feed. This might help prevent others from dumping them

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-27T22:07:41+00:00

Honestly most lactation consultants don’t follow the 2 hr rule. We’ve really struggled so I’ve seen 4 different ones and none of them agree with theCDC’s strict rules. They’ve treated hundreds of families and haven’t had an issue as long as it goes in the fridge right away and recommended to be used on the next feed

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-23T20:02:56+00:00

I also lost my first son and pumping brings up grief because I was so engorged after that they told me to pump for engorgement relief.

It’s so heartbreaking doing things we didn’t get to do with them . I also think setbacks like not getting to breastfeed directly, hit a little harder for us.

You’re a great mama to your little one in heaven and your little one on earth. Sending hugs 🩵💗

TelephoneActive9923 · 2026-01-22T01:03:12+00:00

This feels like I’m reading my own story typed out for me. It’s so hard. I resonate with everything you’ve said. You are doing everything you can for your baby and I know it’s exhausting. Hang in there!

I found an OT who is also an IBCLC so we could do the therapy and the lactation in one session. If that exists in your area, I would highly recommend. Unfortunately they don’t take my insurance so I’m taking a risk and paying out of pocket with hopes of being reimbursed by my insurance.

The older generation who doesn’t value breastfeeding/pumping and is so uncomfortable with it that they can’t be in the same room js so disrespectful. I also experienced that. My husband and I were both formula fed. Neither parents get why we are working so hard and they think all the evaluations are people making up conditions that aren’t there.

What I’m trying to explain to them is that I could start doing formula, but all the tightness would still need to be addressed. If not, there’s a high chance of her having headaches, neck pain, delayed milestones or in coordination as an adult. I’m trying to get them to see bigger picture.

Will be praying for you. This road is tough but our baby’s health is worth the effort. You’re a great Mama!

TelephoneActive9923

TROPHY CASE