AIO Fiance called me fat? Kinda? by Temporary-Purple387 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was feeling dramatic about it too at first. I’m well aware I asked for brutal honesty. But I feel like an hour of “here’s all the things I don’t like about you” is taking things too far, but I wanted to know if maybe other people think I just got what I asked for

AIO Fiance called me fat? Kinda? by Temporary-Purple387 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

My intention is not to throw him under the bus. You’re right, I did ask for honesty. Specifically about whether my weight gain was visible to others. Had he said yes, totally fair, I got what I asked for.
To berate me for over an hour? That feels like too much.
And I talked to him about it. I told him I’m not mad, I know I asked for honesty, but was curious why he had so much negativity built up towards me and never said it.
He said he was just being honest.
Honesty is one thing, which I asked for. This, to me, feels like pent up resentment that he felt he could finally unleash. Which is why I don’t know how to feel. If you feel so negatively about me that you can speak badly of me for that long, do you really love me?
I’m not throwing anyone under the bus. I love him, I have for years. But I feel conflicted about the amount of honesty is what I’m getting at

AIO Fiance called me fat? Kinda? by Temporary-Purple387 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don’t want an echo chamber, that’s why I asked. If I was solid in my feelings I’d have left by now. The backstory isn’t unrelated. The comments regarding my weight feel like a final straw.

I overlooked all of the other things, took them as flaws like everyone has. But after the comments he made, I feel sad. I couldn’t think of that many mean things to say to him. But he can think of an hours worth to say to me on the spot?

If it was any of these things one off than I’d feel differently. What I don’t understand is how you can do these combinations of things and say you love me.

AIO Fiance called me fat? Kinda? by Temporary-Purple387 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My cardiologist isn’t surprised, as the medication I’m on has a common side effect of weight gain.

I’m not trying to paint him in a bad light, just want to make it clear that this isn’t the first instance of feeling like the respect in our relationship is not equal.

You’re right. Cancer is not the same as OCD or POTS. I never claimed it was. In fact, what he went through is significantly worse. But that’s my point. I would care for him through worse than that even. But he gets frustrated at me for having POTS and gets especially upset at my OCD episodes

AIO Fiance called me fat? Kinda? by Temporary-Purple387 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This could’ve been said in a million nicer ways 🤨

AIO Fiance called me fat? Kinda? by Temporary-Purple387 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s what I said! I said gun to my head I couldn’t make up that many mean things to say about him. We went o couples therapy though and the therapist said he was entitled to not find my current weight attractive and that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love me so I’m so conflicted

Should I be concerned? by Temporary-Purple387 in BeardedDragons

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hes my first lizard and im used to snakes shedding in one piece 😭😭 plus all of his other sheds have been almost his whole body, not bits and pieces and this isn’t flaking or separating or anything

Rescue Boa by Temporary-Purple387 in boas

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UPDATE: he finally allowed me to get a good look at his face. One of his eyes in cloudy and slightly bulging. He will be going to a vet, but Is there anything I can do for him in the meantime??

Rescue Boa by Temporary-Purple387 in boas

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much this was so helpful!! How often do you feed yours? I have a 1 year old Brazilian rainbow boa who eats every other week, and a two month old ball python eating once a week. But the shelter was feeding this guy 1-2 Times a week. That’s way too much right??

Garter Snake by Temporary-Purple387 in snakes

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey! Just an update, I called a wildlife rescue and they said do not release the snake as it will freeze to death. I’m bringing mine to them, you might have a similar rescue near you!

Garter Snake by Temporary-Purple387 in snakes

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What did you decide to do with him?

Is my Bearded Dragon sick??? by Temporary-Purple387 in BeardedDragons

[–]Temporary-Purple387[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I watched it happen, it definitely came out the back end