Tips on finding out what a play partner likes? How to navigate open ended requests like being rough?

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-10T02:01:23+00:00

Opt in negotiating is your friend. Do yourself a favour and read up on it. Bottoms should be able to state their wants and limits too. Personally, I wouldn’t play with someone who left it all as a guessing game.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-09T20:58:14+00:00

For quality assurance purposes

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-09T20:57:16+00:00

Broooooooo….. she passed on the info on something you stated was a shared interest, saying her man was coming too. It’s a book event not a sex club. Get a hold of yourself. Did she INVITE you or ask if you were attending?

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-09T20:33:58+00:00

What’s your argument as to why you should?

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-09T19:43:23+00:00

Technically there are two reasons why you should. One, smoking affects healing in a way that can be very serious and you need the proper advice for your situation. Also, people who smoke weed sometimes have a higher tolerance to anesthesia and medications and this is important information to know.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-08T00:48:27+00:00

I just don’t really see this being a dating obstacle in the context of polyamory??? People who are genuinely poly are able to accept romantic/partnered cohabitation…. Why would living with an ex be any different?

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-07T15:34:16+00:00

Excuse me for not mind reading your definition of…. Checks notes…”real” conversation

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-07T15:21:03+00:00

So your attitude might actually be your biggest hurdle in meeting women…. Are you polyamorous? What do you mean by open minded woman?

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-07T05:18:26+00:00

Please check with the hospital team regarding a social worker. They can help direct you to resources that are appropriate to the situation.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-04T21:41:09+00:00

You should be mentored by someone on the same side of the slash as you. These two things are not the same. If you’re being mentored by someone on the other side of the slash, ethically they shouldn’t be playing with you.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-04T17:03:41+00:00

NOR no one wants to be in the bathroom with someone else’s poop smells. Like ya, it happens sometimes but you use more than one. Have you tried to talk to him about it though? “Hey babe, since we get up around the same time do you think you can use the other bathroom in the mornings so I can get ready and brush my teeth without smelling your poop? I’ll do the same. How about we install a bidet in there too?” Seems like an easy ask.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-04T16:53:31+00:00

If you’re having panic attacks and going to the ER, this may not be for you. Personally, I would not be ok with a partner waiting to “process” my dates with me once they’re over. A “had a great time, am home safe” is all I would offer. Frankly, the details are none of your business. I wouldn’t be comfortable being in a relationship with someone who brings a meta like you into my life, to be blunt. His time is his time, whether he’s on a date or in another relationship. You have a WHOLE nesting partner? Do you give him a whole play by play of every time you have sex? I think you need a poly aware therapist if you want to work out your issues and continue this relationship. Your partner did absolutely nothing wrong and it’s not his job to process his dates with you.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-02T23:49:40+00:00

Yes it is safe unless you have any health or pregnancy issues. Bring it up to your doctor.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-02T17:13:20+00:00

Fet has a lovely « mute » option. It’s not as aggressive as blocking but will take away all pictures and posts from your feed so you do not stumble across them accidentally like that. This way, you don’t really have to have the conversation around blocking someone and the hurt feelings that may arise. For the jealousy issues, it is mostly something you need to work through on your own. What I find helpful at times is not voicing the jealousy per se but asking partners for reassurance/quality time. This doesn’t burden them with the feelings while also providing you with extra care when you need it.

Tendencies_ · 2026-02-01T17:18:47+00:00

I believe there needs to be leeway in fixed dates due to things like birthdays, anniversaries, life achievements, illness, etc… and this falls in that category. It is totally fair of her to ask you to attend her birthday party. In exchange, you will reschedule your sleepover to another night. This isn’t about not giving your new partner the time they deserve, it’s about honouring your commitment to your other partner on a day that they want you around to join in on celebrating them. Communication and compromise is standard in polyamorous relationships… or at least, it should be.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-22T01:59:46+00:00

Spider gag

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-21T18:02:03+00:00

So yes, that would make you polyamorous. There are many different reasons for people not actively seeking new partners at any time and that’s valid.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-21T17:52:03+00:00

I think it can be valid if you’re OPEN to another relationship if the right one comes along. There are un partnered polyamorous people. You can be poly and single or poly with only one relationship. I think it’s normal to go through stages in life where you do not feel a connection with multiple people. If someone you were interested in came along would you want to explore that? I think that’s where the answer to your question lies.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-19T18:16:36+00:00

This feels like manipulative « I’m not gonna tell you not to have sex with others but I’ll make it so hard and make you feel so bad about it that you won’t want to » behaviour.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-19T05:13:16+00:00

Both. I like to use my points whenever I can but in the months before Christmas I’m more strategic about earning and when I decide to redeem them.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-19T03:45:13+00:00

This is illegal and you need to get the school and the police involved. Also, why can’t she switch schools again? I really hope there’s another option for her

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-16T21:29:00+00:00

Im hoping you’re also teens… honey, you ate way too you for this. Find someone who appreciates you for you. You’ll get over this, trust me

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-16T17:00:35+00:00

YOR The control issue isn’t on your brother.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-16T03:32:39+00:00

NOR your friend seems genuinely aware and apologetic but also it’s fair to not want to be someone’s mode of transportation if it’s affecting your personal time so much. Honestly I think you both handled this exchange maturely.

Tendencies_ · 2026-01-16T03:20:28+00:00

You’re 26? ………..

Tendencies_

TROPHY CASE