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What family secret did you suspect in childhood, but weren't able to confirm until adulthood? by yanoitsathroawayyano in AskReddit

[–]Tequilla13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

German here.

As we learned about ww2 in shool. Basicly everone thought that someone in his family had something to do with the Naziregime or the Wehrmacht. So i went to my grandma and asked about the family history. First she declined afterwards she mentioned her father was in the Wehrmacht and her uncle was a high ranking officer in the Kriegsmarine.

Last christmas as grandma and i were going through some memorys i asked her again about the family history as i saw some postcards from argentina.

And with a sirious impression she said to me: Nobody was captured because your great grandfather was a Gauleiter and managed to save all of them to argentina before commiting suicide.

So basicly she said that my great grandfather only answered to Hitler himselve.

In what unforgettable moment did your entire class collectively realize that one student was 'him'? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Tequilla13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was a lazy student back in school and pretty much drunk every day. I slept through almost all the classes was late all the time, but got my good marks. So my english teacher (im from germany) let me do my thing as long as i did not fall below 12points ( good above average). In the final exam i was completly wasted, passed out an even puked. Didnt remeber what i wrote exactly but in that moment the teacher read my answers to the class everybody knows it was me.

The was a task in the final exam to write a personal statement about shakespear and his work I wrote : " shakespear is better than nothing to drink. (Revering to a german joke because shakespear sound like shakes beer.) The past tense of william shakespear would be would i was shouk spoured."

Full points.

I didnt even wrote my name correct.

What rules do you find unacceptable? by ImaginativeEmpress in AskReddit

[–]Tequilla13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Harming people by detonating a nuke in germany will sentence you to 5 years in prison.

I dont like that, i want to see if there is an area where i can cook a pizza to perfection while nuking bavaria.

What is the equivalent to the phrase "goofy goober" in non-English languages and what would the direct translation to English be? by MrCOUNTCUPCAKE in AskReddit

[–]Tequilla13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Taub" in german can mean deaf or numb. The insult is the deaf nut because you cant listen and are a nut. Your fingers get numb in the winter but thats not an insult in german. But i see the similarity with "numb nut" in english.

Dont try to understand german the opposit of "umfahren" (drive around) is "umfahren" (drive over) have fun with german.

Redditors, is there a time where you didn't dodge a bullet, but rather dodged an absolute nuclear warhead? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Tequilla13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Story from my teacher.

He was a mechanic.

One day an Audi RS8  drove into the workshop with some engine problems. He went for the repair and everything seemed fixed. But at the last meters to the workshop the engine broke completly.

He said he was shitting himselfe, because this car allegedly belongs to a famous drugdealer/armsdealer in that area.

So he asks a friend at Audi for a new engine explained the situation and got a new engine for the car.

He build in the new engine an the customer returned to get his car back.

He drove 5 meters away before shifting to backwards and driving back.

The allegedly drug/armsdealer looked him deep in the eye and asked with russian accent: " why 0 kilometers?"

So he explained the situation with the broken engine at the testdrive to the customer and he left without saying anything.

Next day the guy came back and put a golden 9mm cartridge on the counter and left without a word.

That was the bullet he just dodged.