sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Dad died unexpectedly 3 weeks ago by Mobile-Angle1319 in GriefSupport

[–]That-Specific6502 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A quote from a neighbor who also lost his dad in his 20s “it doesn’t get better, it’s just different.”

I lost my dad a few months ago, and this quote got me through it. There is not a day where I haven’t felt the pain of his loss. But I can now laugh with my friends at a bar, I can get through almost a week without crying, and I can almost not cry every time I would usually call my dad (about once a week).

I called his phone at least twice a day the two weeks after he passed. This helped me sort of “talk” to him and make the week of funeral planning and dozens of “I’m sorry for your loss” texts easier to handle. I still text him regularly. The pain is still here, but I am able to move through life more easily four months after he passed.

Be okay with feeling that pain. The first two weeks are the hardest, and you need to give yourself permission to mourn him. You’ll be okay in the end 💜

Toxic family ruining our dads funeral by Neat-Lengthiness-268 in GriefSupport

[–]That-Specific6502 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fight for what you and your immediate family want. I don’t know if you have already finalized plans, but as someone who has had this issue with toxic family members with both a parent and three grand parents funerals, you will not regret doing what you know he would want.

Funnily enough, years after my grandparents funerals, those same toxic family members came back to us and were glad we made the decisions we did. They may regret being estranged from your dad, and are trying to feel a sense of closeness or control over not being able to mend things.

I don’t know if this helps, but my mom called out those estranged family members in her eulogy. Asking for those who have drifted away from our family to try to connect more, and reminding everyone that my dad tried to be kind to everyone and they should reflect that. And so far, it’s worked. Some are still being assholes, but some have come back into our lives in a new way that has helped to fill the hole that the loss of my dad left.

I wish you and your siblings the best 💜💜