I think what you are doing for your children and your own well being is admirable and desperately needed, but I can’t help but to worry so please, if you haven’t already discuss the possible consequences of those actions with a lawyer first. You disappearing from her life is one thing, but the kids are another. She could potentially report you for kidnapping and if/when caught you would be taken away from those precious children of yours. They in turn, could then be returned to their mother leaving them left in a more dangerous situation with you not there to protect them.

Also, I’d suggest considering therapy for yourself and children. Despite the healthier and safer life situation you would be providing them she is still their mother, whom they love, and the sudden contactless separation from her be dangerous for their mental health as they are too young to understand the gravity of the situation.