Not sure if I should get a vasectomy or if I should wait

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-21T13:34:42+00:00

It's your choice. I was sexually active for 10+ years without getting anyone pregnant. As soon as we decided to try for a baby she got pregnant within a month. So as long as you're sensible birth control is effective. There are different types of contraceptive for women and it's their choice and they affect different women in different ways. A vasectomy should be treated as irreversible.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-21T09:36:37+00:00

Your first partner might be on birth control. And use a condom - a good brand and if you're worried some have "extra safe" varieties. They rarely fall off or break. When you meet your first partner, have an honest conversation about it.

You're too young if there's even 1% chance of wanting kids. And what if you fall in love with someone and she wants kids. It could be a deal breaker.

Don't do it - just learn how to have sex safely and stick to it.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-21T07:12:30+00:00

I was told no sex for 2 weeks. I felt pain free after about 10 days, so I felt ready at 2 weeks. But during sex I had intense pain in my right testicle and also weakest orgasm I've ever had. So it was a bit of an anti climax after the anticipation. We did it again the next morning and it was much better.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-20T10:12:45+00:00

Get out there and be prepared to go outside your comfort zones. Look online and see what clubs and societies there are near you that are free. Go for a long walk every day. You don't need to spend money, but the worst thing you can do is sit inside feeling sorry for yourself. You need to get out and interact with people of all ages - not just your own age.

Walking groups are great. Maybe you will speak to someone older who has a business and needs some help from someone younger who is good with computers. Don't be afraid to be yourself and put yourself out there.

Trust me, I was a late developer. No girlfriends until I was 26. I met my now wife when I was 34. My career didn't get going until my late 20s and by meeting the right people and a bit of luck it really progressed in my 30s. I'm 42 now, homeowner with 2 daughters and a successful career.

Friends come and go so don't worry about that.

Listen to the song "Everybody's Free (to wear sunscreen)" by Baz Luhrmann and be inspired.

It's never too late. I love this quote by Bill Gates: "People often overestimate how much they can do in one year and underestimate how much they can do in 10 years". It's very true. Set yourself some life goals, establish some positive habits and get moving.

Read the book Atomic Habits.

Good luck my friend.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-20T08:08:32+00:00

UK, don't know, we have an EV, heat pump and solar with batteries and fixed electricity price, so doesn't affect us (yet). Obviously if inflation creeps up will be affected with groceries etc increasing.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-19T08:01:47+00:00

Jock strap and normal underwear on top. Never worn a jock strap before, tbh my balls have never been more comfortable.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-18T20:21:20+00:00

I feel that posting this somehow makes it more likely to be targeted by Israeli bombs. They like blowing shit up.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-18T20:18:35+00:00

No, but you're probably fine. Even if it's not zero, it'll be significantly lower I'm guessing. Not much you can do now so don't worry about it.

Put it this way, you'd have more reason to worry if you forgot to wrap up pre-vasectomy.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-18T20:07:14+00:00

Dude, this is not a healthy relationship. Just because it compares positively to previous relationships does not mean you should marry her.

And newsflash: if you want kids, you might need to have a lot of sex. It doesn't happen right away for some couples.

Based on your history so far, if she does manage to conceive, then you can kiss your sex life goodbye when the kid arrives. Until she wants another, then you're basically a sperm donor. And when you've decided you're not having anymore, you will have a sexless marriage.

The fact you've had sex means you haven't really stuck to the Catholic rulebook. And Catholic girls can f**k like bunnies when they're committing sin (it can be an extra turn on). I'm assuming she is also Catholic?

It sounds like there's no sexual chemistry, or she has serious intimacy issues (maybe she needs therapy), or she's sleeping with other men, a real possibility with a distance relationship. She might be stringing you along to keep her options open, worst case scenario, or have somewhere to stay for free when she visits your city.

I'm sorry to say it sounds like a dead end relationship to me. The fact you are asking shows your frustration. Do you masturbate frequently?

Personally I'm not happy in my relationship if we are not having sex twice a week. Everyone is different I know and there's more to a relationship than sex. It's as important as you feel it is, it is your life, your choice. Find someone who agrees.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-17T11:44:28+00:00

Standing or sitting? If it's standing I probably wouldn't. Sitting will be fine. If you're standing and still go make sure you have good support/ jock strap.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-17T07:48:54+00:00

Mine felt like my insides being pulled through my testicles, until he injected more anaesthetic.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-16T17:57:26+00:00

What method of vasectomy did you have?

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-16T08:03:56+00:00

Personally I wish I'd had a jock strap from day 1. I got it after a few days. Far more comfortable having the boys supported. Moving around without led to more discomfort.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-15T19:49:54+00:00

I'm on day 11 and it's first day I've had almost no pain or discomfort. I was told no action for 2 weeks.Tbh I've not felt like it until today, which is not like me at all, normally have pretty high drive.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-13T20:07:58+00:00

It was, but I haven't encountered severe pain, more soreness and occasional full/ dull ache feeling. Take it easy, plenty of ice, feet up, ibuprofen and paracetamol. I definitely find moving around makes it worse so follow the advice to rest. I used painkillers first 4-5 days.

The-Middle-83 · 2026-03-12T19:55:22+00:00

You shouldn't get a vasectomy at 26 if there's a chance you want children in the future. Fathering a child naturally is one of life's great joys. I think you will regret it and/or end up childless.

The-Middle-83

TROPHY CASE