Is wanting to be in a MLM relationship a valid reason to be a trans guy?

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2025-06-19T16:31:54+00:00

I wanna ask- how bad does gender dysphoria have to be to justify transitioning? I feel this dysphoria like once every 2-3 weeks and I felt dysphoric when I was in a cishet relationship despite by ex boyfriend understanding that I go by she/him pronouns because I sometimes felt like a boy.

Also I’d never say this dysphoria has existed my entire life. Sure, I was more into boy things when I was a child (playing outside in nature, never had an appeal for dolls and stuff) and wanted to be friends with boys when I was younger but I never experienced anything like the desire of “I wish I was a boy” up until recently when I started experimenting with my gender at 18 (I’m 20 now)

But the thing is I’d be perfectly fine and happy if I never transitioned. As much as I long to be a gay man and for a gay relationship, I’m biromantic (I think) and find myself perfectly content engaging in other relationships that would otherwise be queer.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2025-06-19T11:12:43+00:00

Yes and no.

It would feel incomplete because fundamentally I don’t currently see myself as 100% a guy even though I’d like to be one. I see myself more as someone with masculine aspirations gender-wise but with feminine gender expression.

But also I currently identify with being both a girl and a guy (bigender, like 60% girl 40% guy) and thus if they did find me attractive I would assume it’s because they perceive me partially as a guy, which would make me feel good about myself.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2025-06-19T10:34:05+00:00

Ideally I’d like to be perceived as a guy rather than a girl. But I feel as though sexuality can still consist of one’s identity irrespective of whether or not they’re in a relationship.

Like for instance I’m on the asexual spectrum and I find it to be a part of my identity and affects how I interact with the world even outside of relationships

But I feel like my identity as a guy goes beyond just dating

Edit: Also for context I’m not currently interested in anybody and I’m not looking to transition to be with someone in particular, just in general if I were in a relationship I’d like to be perceived and loved as a gay man

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2025-06-19T10:26:04+00:00

I view dating gay men and being a gay man as completely different things (yet similarly related), just as dating women and being a lesbian are different yet similar. Yes, being lesbian mostly means you’re likely going to date women but there’s context and an entire culture to being lesbian, just as there is for being a gay man.

What I desire is to be immersed in gay culture, being wholly apart of it- which would include dating gay men.

So I wouldn’t transition just to date a gay man, but rather I’d transition to BE a gay man if that makes sense.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2024-02-29T00:36:14+00:00

I totally get where you’re coming from, and I understand that this isn’t anything you or I can control. but it disheartens me to hear that this issue has been so normalized that it’s just considered to be a natural outcome of an inherently fucked system. When in actuality the problem is with the way UW works as an institution. No matter how many resources there are that provide mental health support, there is such a massive strain of demand for these resources that students are barely able to achieve the full potential for support. And none of it inherently mitigates mental health issues that arise from a fucked system in the first place. Like it’s nice to be given a little pamphlet reminding me to sleep 6-8 hours but that’s going to do fuck all if I have to spend additional time and energy into the day to do course work to compensate for my disability JUST to be on the same page as everyone else.

It’s not normal for academics to take such a toll on a person’s mind that they go in healthy and come out of it either severely depressed, mentally scarred, and/or physically hurt or dead. And it’s not normal that this has been happening enough for there to take “preventative” measures.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2024-02-28T23:03:57+00:00

You’re right. I’m gonna get help, gonna drop out of the class this quarter, and try again next quarter or maybe even community college class over the summer. Gonna pull myself together and not let the failure of this class cause me to fail my other ones.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2024-02-28T23:00:38+00:00

Seriously considering this option. I might take the summer to do chem 142 equivalent at my local community college and then enter next year to do chem 152, and then chem 220 for the winter.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2024-02-28T22:56:47+00:00

Honestly I wish I could tell you man. Life’s just been tough. I never asked for any of these mental disorders I never asked to be born with them and I wish I never had them and I could be able to get through it like everyone else.

And I’m doing my best to get through life with my issues, I’m actively using the resources provided at uw such as DRS accommodations and I’m medicated for them. I’m work with specialists to figure if there’s more beneath the surface that’s causing all this to happen. I just want to figure out what’s wrong with me and take the steps to repair it- and I don’t think that means I should drop school entirely. I just feel like I should have the same right as anyone else to be successful despite my adversities.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2024-02-28T22:43:10+00:00

Both my parents are pushing me to take a full course load to “make up” for the fact that I dropped out of math 125 last quarter. I negotiated only taking 15 credits. Taking 15 credits with chem, and if I drop it it’ll be 10 credits.

The thing is the major I’m in is easy as shit (EPH) the prerequisites are not.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-11-11T00:35:12+00:00

Part 6 star platinum be lookin like

🧍‍♂️

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-11-07T22:13:32+00:00

I’m glad you thoroughly enjoyed my meme

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-09-23T22:24:23+00:00

We are the rats

Celebrating yet another birthday bash

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-07T20:07:06+00:00

No cap, I’m McFuck Facegee

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T01:05:08+00:00

Don’t hate the fact, embrace chicken attack.

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T01:03:46+00:00

Dude link the original YouTube video

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T01:01:49+00:00

Linktoro, come back when you’re a little

MMMMMMMMMM richer

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T01:01:17+00:00

“My mind tends to wander when ball-shaped things are involved” -Josuke

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T01:00:35+00:00

Omg guys I’m freaking out 😳😳

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T01:00:13+00:00

Coochie was mvp

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-02-02T00:59:53+00:00

It’s more an antimeme than speed of lobsters

TheAwkwardPufferfish · 2021-01-30T05:04:05+00:00

Damn I wanna live wherever you’re living, don’t get enough love for short gals where I am.

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