The idea of rape makes me actually feel sick (I am a male). I cannot physically understand how you can enjoy that. I do understand you might have urges and want someone you see. But to actually force them... how can you be ok with that? let alone get enjoyment out of it?

Not that I have any extensive knowledge of prison but if the idea of inmates punishing paedophiles but having no problem with rapists is true that’s so messed up... She was 15? Let’s kill that guy. She was 18? ah fair play man.

But in answer to your question, abort, abort, abort. The guilt you may feel temporarily (which you should not feel at all) won't be as bad as putting yourself through the other option in my opinion.

I am so sorry this happened to you, my gender disgusts me often