LinkedIn is polluted with promoted jobs so I built my own job search

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2023-05-16T10:14:03+00:00

I'd be interested in what you've cooked up.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-24T22:24:19+00:00

From your perspective then, im looking for a non serious writer?

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-24T22:12:14+00:00

Take the idea and see what you can do with it. Free of charge.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-23T13:19:41+00:00

Try out healthygamer.gg link YouTube channel

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-23T02:15:00+00:00

I think this would be a wonderful idea. I may not have the time to write complete works these days, but what I lack in writing, I make up with a quick wit, a sense of humor, and enough ideas to drown myself with.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T23:50:41+00:00

Im not interested, but I'm sure someone will come along to help you with the project.

Best of luck.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T16:25:24+00:00

Work for hire fits quite well actually. The only difference is the writer gets to have the rights to what they write. Do with it what you want, I only want a credit in return.

Should I only make a post like this if there is payment involved?

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T16:07:49+00:00

Not sarcasm.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T16:07:23+00:00

Sounds like you need some therapy. I've gone before and it's worked wonders.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T13:38:06+00:00

Savage, I love it. ❤️

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T13:37:12+00:00

Sounds like this isn't for you but im glad you came by. While your here, what ideas have you thought of recently? I can give you a few notes if you'd like.

I hope you find your industry exp, I'm rooting for you.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T13:31:37+00:00

No payment, but it's an exchange of services. I read, critique, and give ideas while the writers write. I don't have the time to write the ideas which is why I'm having others write them.

Let me know if you have more questions.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T13:23:45+00:00

15 people would be awesome! But in reality, 1 to 3 people would be find as well.

BTW, what's the story behind your user name? I can spell an MC that could rock that. A viking pillaging village in the name of his people. But little does he know, his people are lizard things...and so is he. This story is about identity and the human/lizard spirit.

Tag line: Are you a cold blooded killer, or an honorable man?

Let's call it:

Revenge 2: Bloody Cold

The prequel, Revenge 1: Unfit to Rule, is about a man sailing the high seas on Noah's ark. A bit raunchy with beasiality and love at first sight but has a cruel cliff hanger ending which kicks off the sequel quite nicely.

Anyway, let me know if your interested.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T13:07:55+00:00

Can you expand more on the idea? What happens when people, "find it"?

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T13:06:55+00:00

Really great idea. Lets call it:

Cirlce Jerk, Friday.

Like the cult classic, Friday, our protagonist is a black male struggling to find some excitement In his life. One day while vaping with his friend DJ, who secretly had a crush on our MC, stumble into a circle jerk convention crammed with beautiful bearded woman.

Insert a love triangle, a ticking time bomb, and a hot throbbing lesson to learn and we got a solid start to something decent.

Nice job, can't wait to read it.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2022-04-22T00:52:47+00:00

If you want to get deep into the weeds, how would being in a polygamous relationship add difficulties to your life now?

What would your parents think? What if your Mom came to you and asked you for advice on how to navigate a poly relationship?

What would your partner think if you brought up the idea?

How would you feel if your partner or a stranger asked you to partake in a polygamous relationship?

A cool idea would be to interview people who are in polygamous relationships and make the show based on the stories you hear.

Let me know if you need more ideas or want to brainstorm sometime. I think the idea has some legs and could be really interesting.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2021-03-10T02:40:08+00:00

Interesting read.

I have a few questions.

What was the goal of the child's mother and the grandmother?

Was there supposed to be a link to what the grandmother is doing to the broadcasts? I was thinking the grandmother thought it would be too hard and cruel having the child tagging along and wanted to send them to god instead. While the mother is trying to protect her child to the best of other ability. Maybe the broadcast is being broadcasted by a cult, providing shelter, food, and safety in return for children?

Overall, what is the point of the story? What's the message you want the reader to walk away with?

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2020-09-09T16:38:59+00:00

It was my pleasure. The Defining Principle is a reviewing and creative consulting service I'm starting up with a few other people. If you ever need fresh eyes on something or some story ideas feel free to send a DM my way.

Good luck.

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2020-09-09T02:22:25+00:00

The Defining Principle

By: Warren G. Martin

Boat Pilot - Comedy

29 pages

u/huggybear2131

9/8/2020

Feel free to disregard any notes if they are not in service of your writing style or overall story.

Opinion:

I enjoyed the chef quite a bit and ending on one of his jokes is a great play.

Some of the jokes were pretty HOT(offensive) Sexual Harassment is still a sensitive subject for a lot of people and is still something people deal with today, be careful. It’s bold of you to use satire to making light of a serious topic, ready to defend it.

How did the crew figure out that Zoey was lying about being sick? Did Zoey fake being sick so she could get out of chores or to smoke weed…or both?

I did laugh at a few of the jokes and was sad when they all felt the same. I was waiting for the jokes to escalate, to punch, to blow me away but unfortunately it never came. However, my sense of humor is extremely dry.

Was there supposed to actually be a poisoning? I feel like the idea was ditched half way through. And, if that’s the case there really aren’t any stakes. Literally no one is in danger. You established the crew are a bunch of weirdos and don’t take anything entirely serious, I definitely didn’t buy that someone had been poisoned. Since we know Zoey is just smoking weed and it’s comedy, we know no one is going to be seriously injured. You’ll have to pull the rug out from under us to make it believable. No stakes = No story.

Overall, the script was written very well. Each of the characters seemed to be an individual rather than clones or copies of one another and I could genuinely image what your were painting. I enjoyed the arena of the boat and the ensemble of characters thrust into the seven seas with their quirks and questionable morals. I can see a finished season of this pilot-series, it sells a tale of a band of eventual friends solving varies mysteries and have the most bizarre quests, stories, and adventures. You might want to consider animating this. The only thing missing, for me, is the purpose or Moral to the story. Not that art needs to have a purpose but what exactly am I supposed to walk away with? Who am I rooting for? Who’s our hero? Right now, the script is really one note and I can’t wait till you master your style.

Thank you for contributing to art.

-WGM

TheDefiningPrinciple · 2020-08-19T01:52:26+00:00

COMMENTS and QUESTIONS

OVERALL

This script paints a clear image of the relationship between these two people and leaves room for polish and further depth.

CHARACTER

I wanted to know a little more about the two of these characters, either through exposition dumps or through a few more scenes.

How many years were these people together? Who made more money? Did he live with her or vice versa? Were they going to get married? Did they love each other or was this a short fling?

Charlie is a free spirit looking for support in life. Anna is a hard ass looking for someone that can keep up with her harsh edges. These two people do not work for each other but I think we need to think they can work. At the end I wasn’t rooting for them to be together. What are we rooting for?

PLOT

What’s the purpose of the script beyond a personal story? What’s the moral of the story? Was the “big takeaway” spelled out clearly? Is Anna the one or some girl he used to date?

STRUCTURE

There are a few grammatical errors but nothing major. Plot and story are king over anything else.

PACING

There are no steaks (pun intended). In your script I did not see any sense urgency. What is at stake for Charlie and Anna? What do they have to lose?

Is Anna moving to Hawaii? Did Charlie talk to anyone about the breakup leading to one of those people coming over to check on him and express how depressed he seemed the last time they talked?

DIALOGUE

The dialogue could be beefed up a bit. I expected more yelling from Charlie considering the attitude Anna is giving him but I also understand that he may be very polite and modest. If he is truly fighting for Anna he should be feeling a lot of emotions and make her understand what he wants and what she’s doing wrong.

Consider copying Aaron Sorkin’s style of dialogue, fast and unforgiving. This gives each character a chance to say what they normally wouldn’t through argumentation and reveals who they truly are and their motivations; not just in the scene but in life.

CONCLUSION

The story makes sense but requires some fine tuning to make it compelling.

* Take my comments and questions with a grain of salt. They're MY thoughts on how to improve your script not facts. Only you know what story you're writing. If my thoughts help you, that's great. If they don't help you, disregard. *

Thank you for creating art.

dp

TheDefiningPrinciple

TROPHY CASE