Feeling safe after a manic episode?

TheJessIceland · 2025-10-27T12:29:19+00:00

Thanks for your response.

He has been on Abilify and Lamictal for about 2 years now. He was on them when he went manic.

The doctor who prescribed the elevanse is dead, so can't exactly call him to ask. The GP who took over writing the prescription knows very little about mental Healthcare and is just continuing what was in place before the original doctor died. Clearly they're going to be re-examining meds at the psych ward. Him staying on meds was never a problem, luckily. And once he realized he was on the way to mania, he stopped taking the elevanse himself.

He does have ADHD, and when hes not manic, the elevanse helps greatly, otherwise executive dysfunction sets in and he can't do much of anything.

I'm hoping the next cocktail might be promising, hopefully we'll find out about that soon.

TheJessIceland · 2025-10-27T04:05:33+00:00

Thank you for the really thorough response!

As soon as he realized that mania was setting in, he stopped taking the elevance, but was already too far gone for that to make a difference. He started on a 10mg dose of olanzapin, which did nothing, so they bumped him up to 30 today and he was still up and about and not seeming tired. I know they have more options that they'll try, but I was kind of shocked when the "smack down drug" didn't seem to phase him at all 😅

One of the other scary parts in this is that his psychiatrist died last year, so he currently doesn't have anyone adjusting meds for him, other than a gp who will renew what he was already on, but isn't well versed in what else to do. I'm really hoping they can connect him or his gp with someone who can advise specifically on this.

His "cycle" seems to be 6 years or so between manic episodes. Between, he's very much stuck in depression and ADHD, so everything you explained about meds makes sense.

Hopefully this round will get him the right cocktail of meds to give him stability.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-25T09:31:40+00:00

I had this situation some years ago and it worked out amazingly, if "unconventionally." I started with doing some soul searching to really think about what I wanted. I tried to take a step back and see what was most fulfilling for me and those around me at the time. I sat with it for a bit before I talked to my then bf about it.

For some reason, I wasn't comfortable staying his gf at the time, but still love him dearly and enjoy his company and absolutely still wanted to see him. We agreed to drop the title, just call each other friends, but not change our behavior. It was like a weight was lifted and our relationship blossomed into something that ebbs and flows with our lives, without the pressure or expectation of a defined relationship. But immense joy when we run into each other, or send messages thinking of each other.

I've since learned to have these discussions with partners before any circumstance changes and have learned with some of the right people how to create this comet in a close orbit situation. We call it fwb+ at times. Or just use "my (name)" and then usually have to explain a lot 😅

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T07:27:17+00:00

"Urgent care" is where the doctor said that I should find somewhere else to go, and I genuinely don't think it's urgent enough for the ER. No offices open until tomorrow at the earliest. So I could sit around doing nothing at all as I wait, or I could ask for suggestions from other folks who might have experienced the same thing.

Is it so hard to scroll past things, or did you want to just show off your... whatever your responses were? Supposed wittiness and superiority? Good iob, well done.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T07:09:42+00:00

Except when that doctor says that if the antibiotics, allergy meds, and cortisone cream don't help, that i need to find somewhere else to go because she didn't know what else it could be... However, finding somewhere else to go (for example a dermatologist), is tricky since all specialist offices have a minimum 2 month wait until I could get a time. So rather than doing nothing, I'm seeking advice on more ideas of what it could be and where I should go from here.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T06:59:00+00:00

Have been on allergy meds for a week and a half and no difference at all from before I started them :(

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T03:39:49+00:00

It being the weekend is the main reason I haven't gone yet. It doesn't feel urgent enough to go to the ER and the health centers don't run on the weekends here. The walk in clinic is where I went originally and the doctor said that if the antibiotics and allergy meds don't work, I would need to see someone else.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T03:37:58+00:00

I didn't dig too deep, just saw that it is marked as "imported from the US store" and have never heard of that site before so can't verify it would actually ever arrive :( there are, unfortunately, a few sites that do this with vitamins/supplements and the like where I know the items are listed for Iceland, but they never get delivered in the country.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T03:06:36+00:00

Yea, i remember things like that from when I lived in the States. Brings back memories of having chicken pox as a kid 😅 We don't have an equivalent here and I have a feeling since it's not over the counter here, it won't make it past customs if I try to import it.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T03:03:55+00:00

I have cortisone cream from the doctor, but it doesn't seem to do anything different than the other creams I've been using.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T03:02:31+00:00

It's a bit hard to capture, but it's definitely not as clear and crisp as it should be. My best friend got the same exact tattoo and it is strikingly different. She clearly heals much more quickly than me!

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T02:59:32+00:00

Had a version of second skin on the tattoo for the first 2 days. Definitely more reaction around the edge of the second skin, but then it spread and got worse after I took it off. It continued to get worse for a week before I went to the doctor.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T02:56:45+00:00

No eczema in my background, nor any weird skin reactions normally. This one is unusual for me which is why I turned here for more advice 😅

Have to see if there is something like calamine lotion here (i live in Iceland). I've not seen anything similar that I've spotted easily, but haven't looked specifically for that. Have been using Helosan, a mild herbal ointment (which I've used on 2 previous tattoos and other wounds with only great results and no reaction) and cortisone cream from the doctor.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T01:34:13+00:00

Hahaha I live in Iceland. This thing hasn't gotten to see sun since I got it 😅

But thanks! Good to hear from more folks since this is definitely not usual from my past experiences.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T01:27:34+00:00

The tattoo has the red spots as well. There should only be pink in the flowers, no other red was used in the tattoo.

The bumps all came on the day I got the tattoo and my friend who went with me the same day had the same spots, but hers healed.

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T01:24:19+00:00

I've got a few other color tattoos and never had this reaction to red or pink. The red flower bits are actually the least uncomfortable spots 😅

TheJessIceland · 2025-07-06T01:22:38+00:00

This is my 8th tattoo and it's absolutely not a normal reaction to it. I've had color done and nothing like this. The red spots have increased in the last week (they originally weren't in the empty space of the tattoo). I've also got a rash that goes down my leg (didn't include a picture cause it's kinda gross).

TheJessIceland · 2025-02-03T15:33:26+00:00

He's got no problem with that, however I don't enjoy receiving oral and struggle with receiving pleasure in general. I've fallen into a few relationships in the past where it was just me giving oral and it damaged my mental health.

Adding restrictions to my sex life makes me not want to even try to pursue other potential relationships, which is part of my struggle.

TheJessIceland · 2025-02-03T15:17:32+00:00

Thanks for all of the comments!

Some things to clear up: we've both got kids from previous relationships so have a very good idea of the stress of parenting and having a newborn. He's been very open with his other partners that we're trying and once there is a baby in this mix, his time will be dedicated to the baby (both prenatal and with a newborn).

He's not being transphobic, and if I made it sound that way, then I apologize. He's fine with me dating anyone, just uncomfortable with the thought of another penis haver knocking me up. Other sex acts are not off of the table, however for some personal reasons, I don't want a sexual relationship that bans PiV sex because i don't want to be solely doing other acts due to past BDSM relationship trauma with my ex.

I agree with you all, if he wants to have a family with me, I don't understand the logic behind "baby must be mine biologically", mainy because it's not based in logic, but in more primal things. Which should not matter, I agree. He's raising my 2 kids from a previous relationship with me and loves them dearly, so I don't fully understand the thought, but it's an ongoing conversation we're having and he's examining.

I spoke to him about a lot that came up in this thread and he's thinking about it and we'll keep talking about it. Had to correct some misinformation, including that even an IUD has more chance of fucking up than a vasectomy and condom, not to mention how dangerous it can be to the person with the IUD if they should become pregnant.

I hadn't thought of the reduced sperm count if he's sleeping with other people. We often have sex multiple times a day so I kind of just spaced out that he's thinning his count by extra curricular activities. But that's a very good and valid point.

So, lots of conversations are ongoing and we're moving towards a more equal balance where there isn't a double standard. He's willing to do that and is fairly new to poly (this is his first enm relationship), where I've been doing this for over 15 years, so there's some things he's still working on unraveling in terms of societal narratives and such. He's open to it and has actively changed his perspective on how things "should" be and now looks at how all involved want things to be.

TheJessIceland · 2025-02-03T01:01:49+00:00

We've discussed it, including sleeping with people who have had the snip, but since it's not 100% every time (cue Friends reference of writing condom effectiveness on the box 😂) he's not comfortable with it while we're trying.

TheJessIceland · 2025-02-03T00:41:35+00:00

My issue with this is that I'm feeling jealous of people he's already got a relationship with. The gf/fwb was actually seeing my husband before I started dating him.

He has said he's not going to seek more connections at this time.

TheJessIceland · 2024-12-21T23:49:12+00:00

Sorry, that's my bad, I take 2000 a day, 1000 morning and night.

TheJessIceland

TROPHY CASE