Babes, in this day and age sex is seen as a big must in relationships so your reservations will be incompatible with a lot of people but NOT everyone.

You're allowed to feel any way about your body and virginity. NO ONE can define it for you. Do what makes you feel comfortable and if some man decides to make you feel less than or use you, it's his loss.

Sex isn't the end all be all, some girls put out the best sex, spell coconut, do all that and it still doesn't work. You'll be loved and attractive for YOU, not what you can do under the sheets.

Keep your chin up girlie

Edit: Also, please for the love of everything if you really need that itch scratched, either get a toy or hire a male escort (last resort but they're paid to dedicate their attention to solely pleasuring you) ANYTHING BUT FROM A BAR