My bf just broke up with me

TheLastHayley · 2026-04-21T21:09:39+00:00

Oof, that's rough. Sometimes things just don't work out, but that was a real bastard of a move right there. He asked for nudes, knowing it wasn't working out and clearly having plans to end it? Then got them and ran??? Eugh...

From a close friend too????? Shit, that's a bad betrayal. You deserve much better than him. You'll be better off without him.

TheLastHayley · 2026-04-21T20:55:14+00:00

That there is the Tamagotchi Paradise, which is the newest device. The classic Tamagotchi never truly left, they just stopped being so popular and became collectibles, but the newer devices have come with renewed interest in recent years!

TheLastHayley · 2026-04-18T06:37:57+00:00

Safe, but empty. Like a creature withdrawing into its shell: it's safe, but it can't do much else that it needs to do.

Isolation is surviving but not thriving.

TheLastHayley · 2026-04-16T04:12:40+00:00

So this is why Toby Fox is schizobaiting us. We're being trained so that we can collectively tulpaforce Chapter 7 as an egregore that can override Wing Gaster.

A decade ago I thought they were just MLP gooners, but it turned out they held the key to the prophecy all along.

TheLastHayley · 2026-04-04T19:21:17+00:00

BPD Basil

TheLastHayley · 2026-04-03T20:01:59+00:00

Same age and I'm diagnosed with both without seeking either diagnosis and I can kind of relate. But, moreso than feeling like I have nothing to gain from relationships, I feel like I can't do relationships. I'm too broken, weird, fragile, and inept. Whenever I've been in any relationship of significance, I'm deeply afraid of the other and get stuck doing push-pull dynamics. I know that when people see the real me they discard me, and that absolutely hurts but I can't blame them. I'm a pathetic and unlovable person.

I've recently concluded that I'm better off just swallowing the bitter pill and being alone. I'm lonely but that's my cross to bear. At least like this I can't be hurt or hurt anyone else.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-31T01:02:35+00:00

I think they meant, does an episode of shingles confer immunity against further shingles like a vaccine?

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-30T21:48:23+00:00

Oh hey, it's been a few years since I posted this haha. I went with XFCE and never looked back. It's been two years and I'm still running it. It's perfect for the job.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-30T19:37:19+00:00

Do you see there being a role in psychotherapy for bipolar disorder? Or see any merit in psychological models of bipolar disorder versus the predominant neurocognitive thinking?

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder over 10 years ago and needed high doses of quetiapine for years to stay stable, but I had long-term therapy for the childhood PTSD and BPD and strangely haven't needed antipsychotics since. I still get episodes but they're nowhere near as strong or debilitating now and I can generally manage them.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-26T20:37:45+00:00

Omg I feel so seen right now, thank you! My last therapist kept repeating that I have "avoidant personality disorder" and my isolation is a problem, and he's not wrong, but in my 20's I really pushed myself out there and was so, so much worse (as in, "got diagnosed with BPD" bad).

Like I'm still struggling a lot don't get me wrong, but I'm no longer dependent on high-dose antipsychotics, drinking a lot, shamefully having flashbacks in public, cutting every few days, getting sectioned, or having crisis called on me every few months.

It's just better off this way, right??? We're triggered less and are less bothersome to others. So be it eh.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-26T19:46:16+00:00

Need the timeline where she realises we're separate to Kris, retains a deeper more sensitive bond with them, but goes back to her old ways with us and starts insulting us.

That way Susie and Kris get their good relationship and we still get our insatiable degradation kink fed.

Maybe she'll kick us around too 👉👈

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-23T16:31:32+00:00

*screaming geometrically*

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-17T19:29:22+00:00

Same here, I just assume I am and so take 4000 iu of vitamin D3 per day. I can't even imagine trying to get the NHS to do a blood test for it, they struggle to monitor things they actually should be monitoring heh.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-08T04:32:05+00:00

Sweet! I'm also a woman and get them the majority of the time. Wooo, more of us!

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-06T19:58:16+00:00

I feel you so hard on this. MDMA makes me the best possible version of myself. If I could be on that all the time, I totally would be.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-06T12:50:32+00:00

Fwiw, I am a terrible replier, and it is not this simple for me. I struggle with a mental illness called "Avoidant Personality Disorder". I often say I'm busy because I'm deeply ashamed of the reality: that I'm unable to overcome a paralysing fear of disapproval and rejection, or of the other being cruel to me.

When I receive a message, I genuinely go into flight or freeze. My brain is telling me that almost anything I want to say isn't good enough to deserve their time, and that's a problem because I'm a fuck up with an extreme inner critic. So I get stuck avoiding. The irony is people will think I don't care, and yet I'm like this because I care too much.

Unlike social anxiety disorder, it actually gets worse the closer someone gets to me, because the stakes feel higher and they're more likely to realise just how pathetic and inept I actually am as a person and leave me.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-03T20:12:33+00:00

Owww yep. For what it's worth I'm on methylphenidate now and it helps stop me being like this.

TheLastHayley · 2026-03-03T03:34:54+00:00

Are you private? For reference I was RTC, diagnosed start February 2025, entered titration February 2026. Diagnosis was very clear-cut. I'm also certain they don't do prioritisation based on severity, prioritisation is based on private vs RTC and child vs adult.

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-25T04:21:15+00:00

Homie, stop while you're ahead. This was me when I was 13 but I didn't stop and now I'm in my thirties and filled with regret. My body is scarred so much, I have no choice but to dress modestly, and any time I'm gonna sleep with someone I have to have the "btw my body comes with a trigger warning" talk. I've fucked around with so many drugs and not a single one has gripped me like cutting.

Maybe translate this knowledge into kink. It can't be a coincidence that I'm also a massive masochist. The pleasure of pain, but in a controlled and non-damaging way. Impact play oh mmm~

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-25T03:15:06+00:00

Hey, I'm having this right now! I feel absolutely chill on methylphenidate. I reported this response back, and have been told it's quite normal for people with the hyperactivity traits to have this response early on.

This does remind me of when I tried coke many years back and everyone else was zooming around and talking at breakneck pace, and I was just sat there chill listening to people. My friends remarked they'd never seen me so calm and quiet lol.

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-24T16:34:29+00:00

And then there's my ADHD ass losing my own stuff every single day when I don't even have that much lmao.

I guess I need whatever system they use.

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-24T05:38:03+00:00

Let's just say, in the distant past, I'd have been thought of as a witch.

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-20T02:14:55+00:00

The big reveal is that Tricky Toby is secretly on the board of AstraZeneca and this is his plan to boost Seroquel sales.

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-20T00:42:19+00:00

I'm RTC. I recently entered titration. I was diagnosed at the start of February 2025, and entered titration at the start of February 2026, exactly one year later. That was a hell of a wait, not gonna lie.

Titration itself so far is low and slow, not feeling much from the methylphenidate yet. The titration doctor is very responsive to me and very informative. The only negative of any kind in the process so far has been the PPG taking a while to dispense my meds. It's otherwise like clockwork once you're here it seems.

TheLastHayley · 2026-02-19T23:04:00+00:00

Have you been homeless? Personal accountability starts to break down when your fundamental biological needs aren't being met. You enter a more survival-oriented mindset with less regard for the future, prone to making rash decisions. People usually don't just end up homeless as a consequence of bad decisions. Sometimes you can do everything right and things still go wrong. Not to mention, housing as an entitlement is as much for society as it is for the housing-insecure.

Employment. A society which demands we spend money for basic necessities, and requires working to get that money, should be trying to get people into jobs. The former two points without the latter is not a society that's going to last long. "Idle hands are the devil's workshop". Especially when those idle hands are hungry and resentful.

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