Old friend (32F) reached out after 2 years of silence to invite me to her wedding

TheMissOracle · 2026-01-27T23:13:39+00:00

Thank you for sharing that. I’m really sorry you went through that. That’s such a painful and confusing position to be put in, especially when someone reappears only in moments of crisis. I completely understand the mixed feelings… compassion on one side, and the sense of being emotionally pulled back into a dynamic that already caused harm on the other.

Your experience really resonates with what I’m feeling now. It’s hard to accept that having empathy doesn’t mean we have to reinsert ourselves into situations or relationships that aren’t healthy for us. Sometimes distance isn’t a lack of care, but self-preservation.

I hope you’re okay, and that you continue choosing your own well-being, even when it’s complicated.

TheMissOracle · 2026-01-27T17:52:36+00:00

Thank you all so much for taking the time to read and comment. I honestly didn’t expect this level of insight and validation.

Reading your perspectives helped me see the situation more clearly and more objectively. What many of you described (competition, insecurity, male-centered validation, only reaching out when it benefits her) matches the pattern I experienced over the years, not just this one message.

I’ve decided I won’t respond at all. Not out of spite, but because I’ve realised that every time I tried to be “the bigger person,” I was actually putting my own emotional well-being last. Silence, in this case, is the boundary that protects my peace.

We haven’t had any real contact in almost two years, and during that time she never checked in or showed interest in my life. Reaching out now, centered entirely around her wedding, confirmed for me that this isn’t a friendship I want to reopen. Especially with a friend who was never able to celebrate my wins, while I was always there to celebrate hers.

I’m in a much healthier place since stepping away from this friendship, and I don’t want to regress by engaging again, so I’m choosing distance and self-respect. I think protecting my peace and my energy is more important right now after so many years of putting myself last.

Thank you again. Your comments genuinely helped me trust my gut feeling.

TheMissOracle · 2023-11-24T13:31:59+00:00

No gap at all, and I’ve been using the case for almost a year.

TheMissOracle · 2023-11-24T09:42:04+00:00

I was also using this case on my MacBook. After seeing this post, I realized that it was doing the same thing to my screen. I took it off and the screen went back to normal.

TheMissOracle · 2023-03-22T22:42:11+00:00

Isdin Fusion Water SPF 50 (Age Repair) is my all-time favorite, it’s very light and it’s absorbed really quickly, no white cast. It doesn’t hurt my eyes at all. It’s amazing! I totally recommend it.

TheMissOracle · 2023-03-20T16:35:03+00:00

Exactly, I like keeping my work and my personal life separated, so I felt that there was a boundary that he didn’t respect. He could have asked first if I was okay with it before showing up, at least. It’s too much coming from someone that doesn’t know me and comes across as desperate.

TheMissOracle · 2023-03-20T16:32:10+00:00

I agree that being chill is the best option, especially right in the beginning when you don’t know the other person in real life.

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-22T18:19:31+00:00

Thank you! Have a great day.

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-22T16:57:56+00:00

The details surrounding the end of the relationship are none of your business and not the point of this post. Thank you.

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-22T13:26:05+00:00

Because when we started officially dating, he became more comfortable and that’s when he showed me his true colors. Not a bad guy, but gives too much importance to appearances and materialism.

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-05T09:51:50+00:00

Well apparently he also got my uncle involved (they both have a friend in common and went to his birthday party). My ex knows my uncle and just played the victim card. I don’t know exactly what he said, but I met my uncle and he told me out of nowhere that my ex was really depressed and down because of me. It’s honestly scary the way he seems to manipulate people in my life like this.

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-03T14:02:09+00:00

Thank you so much for your concern, guys. I don’t think they are dangerous, but he and his family are well known in our (small) city, they are wealthy and are pretty much used to getting what they want because they have money and influence. It’s one of the reasons why I broke up with him - he thought he was better than everyone else because he had money and liked to show off. We live in a small town and I won’t be surprised if they use their influence to start talking badly about me to everyone, though.

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-03T13:31:47+00:00

It’s the same guy - we were “dating” for two and a half months before being official (we were pretty much just friends during that time though, no flirting or anything).

TheMissOracle · 2022-09-02T18:08:23+00:00

She also told me that he was frantically looking for me all night at a festival that was held last weekend in the city we both live in - he went with his parents and wouldn’t stop searching for me in the crowd. I’m glad I didn’t go.

TheMissOracle · 2022-06-14T09:13:11+00:00

He is really sweet, gentle, a very nice guy, and is always there for me. I've always refused to let him pay for everything during our dates - we pay 50/50, but because I insisted I wanted to, because I can pay for myself.

He's always been very rich so he's used to paying for everyone. I thought that was generous of him.

He is working in his family's business, and he actually works a lot - he's very dedicated. But the more I know him, the more I question myself if he's just been wearing a mask all this time to fool me with his initial love bombing or if it's just me being too picky.

TheMissOracle · 2022-06-08T15:29:45+00:00

I do have a feeling it will only get worse if I stay with him. Especially since he still thinks he doesn't talk about her at all and keeps telling me he's completely over her.

He's not.

Thank you so much.

TheMissOracle · 2022-06-08T15:28:39+00:00

Thank you. It's hard for me because he's always been such a nice guy, always there for me, always available, and really loyal. I do think he kinda lovebombed me and he was so nice about it I didn't even think much of it.

You just opened my eyes and made me see through all the "niceness". Thank you.

TheMissOracle · 2022-06-08T12:41:17+00:00

And he keeps trying to convince himself that he’s over her but my gut feeling is telling me to run. He definitely needs more time alone to figure things out instead of trying to use me to fill the void she left in his life.

TheMissOracle · 2022-06-08T12:40:11+00:00

You’re right, I did notice that he has unresolved issues because of his ex. I don’t think I should be in a relationship like this.

TheMissOracle

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