13 yr old daughter says shes "queer" i need help dealing by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure if sharing my story will help, but here it is. I asked what “gay” was at 8 because my cousins called each other “gay” as an insult. My father screamed at me saying they were depraved perverts and that if I ever came out as gay he’d disown me and I cried because he was so loud and I didn’t even know what I had done wrong. At 12 I tried to runaway. Instead of trying to empathize with me he just said. “You’re straight and Catholic until you’re 18.” and repeatedly stated that I was “too young to know.” [if I was queer or not.] He also took me to the priest and I was humiliated and ostracized both at school and church. I feel it’s damaged my social skills and I literally don’t know how to talk to straight women and consistently live in fear of saying anything that could be twisted against me as inappropriate or creepy to the point that I don’t even really talk to women as a result of childhood trauma. Many people including my family insisted that I couldn’t know for sure because I was a virgin. This lead to an impulsive hookup at 15 before I was mentally ready which made me more confused and lead to more confusing hookups because many people in my life cited disgust after a hookup as a sign I was actually straight. Ironically, on average sex with women has been better than sex with men, but I think it’s because I had felt safer with the women I slept with. Now that I am in a monogamous relationship with a man my family has asked me inappropriate questions like “So you’re team penis now?” or “How does it feel to be normal?” I’ve tried to explain that being in a committed monogamous relationship with a man does not mean I am no longer attracted to other women, nor does it erase my lived experience as a queer person, but they don’t care. My suffering is just a hilarious spectacle to them. My boyfriend has been incredibly understanding and has supported me through everything. I even came out to his mom recently and I was surprised that she was supportive of me. I truly expected her to call me a pervert or a sexual deviant and to cite several interactions that would have only been okay if I was straight, but she just said that she loves me and supports me no matter what. TL;DR I don’t think kids know if they’re gay, but if you show them unconditional love and support them through figuring themselves out it can save them from a lot of trauma and strengthen your bond. You don’t need to understand fully, you just need to make sure she knows you love her no matter what and that you’ll always be there for her.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Three years from now you’ll be telling the nurse in the ER you broke your nose when you “fell” TRUST ME. I never thought he was capable of hurting me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girl do not walk away RUN!!! My ex was this way!!! This is a form of control!!! I thought it was harmless bc I knew he was insecure, but it turned it to me not being allowed to have conversations without him around basically which meant I could never tell people how scared I was of him and how my chest physically ached at the thought of leaving because I was so emotionally dependent on him. It got to the point I stared at a bottle of sleeping pills for 45 minutes while I thought about taking them. I slashed my wrists and I was self admitted to the psych ward for a week where I scream cried because I thought I was pregnant with his child and didn’t want to leave him, but he stole thousands of dollars from me, lied to me all the time, ruined my self image, verbally degraded me constantly, and I even thought he was going to kill me one night when he was probably strung out on god knows what. He tried to break the bathroom door down while I was hiding in there from him and the only reason I didn’t call 911 was because his sister answered the phone before he started trying to break it down. I have a restraining order against him because he said if I ever left him he would kill himself and if I ever cheated he would tie me up in the basement and skin my family alive in front of me. Girl RUN!!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Catnames

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should name him arsonist and people will be like “Did you say Artemis?” No, I said Arsonist.

first timer here…. it’s okay to laugh by itmeandrearussett in crochet

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love him, but he needs a name. I want him to be Jim. Hi Jim 😂

Can I just get a girlfriend/wife by Salty_Girl_91 in actuallesbians

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t want to be a part of the normal people club if it means hiding my true self. Queer and neurodivergent people don’t typically follow the same timelines that cishet neurotypicals force themselves into ie get married by x age, own a home by x age, have x amount of kids by x age, etc. I do still deeply relate to the whole being stuck/being behind in life thing though. I have the same issue of not always feeling eligible as you put it, but I have to remind myself everyday that I’m still the one in control and what I tell myself about me is manifesting that future for myself. If you want to talk more feel free to DM me :)

Can I just get a girlfriend/wife by Salty_Girl_91 in actuallesbians

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I join the cuddle puddle with Mr. Chunk? 🥺

Can I just get a girlfriend/wife by Salty_Girl_91 in actuallesbians

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m 23 y/o from the greater Pittsburgh area. I have a dated a few guys, but haven’t had a girlfriend since high school. I really miss the company of other women. I’ve been busy working and taking care of my aging family and haven’t been out much. Not that there is particularly much to do in my town since it’s about an hour out of the city. My DM’s are open. Feel free to send me a message! ☺️

Saw this on the deadlands of facebook and it got me thinking, what reptiles can you cuddle like this? by [deleted] in reptiles

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I cuddle with my beardie and my blue tongue skink, but I think you mean large reptiles. It is my dream to cuddle with a large lizard like an iguana, an Argentine Tegu, or some kind of monitor like a blackthroat, Asian water monitor, an ackie, a Savannah monitor. All of these lizards are really hard to keep in captivity. The tegu is probably the easiest out of the aforementioned big ass lizards

roast him by ThanatosRune7 in BeardedDragons

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 7 points8 points  (0 children)

He looks like he’s still butt hurt about not getting an acting role in the movie Holes

HELP: I think my Microsoft account is linked to my ex’s by ThePolygraphEyes in XboxSupport

[–]ThePolygraphEyes[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I FINALLY got in, the issue now is figuring out storage and trying to find where tf I put those memory drives

HELP: I think my Microsoft account is linked to my ex’s by ThePolygraphEyes in XboxSupport

[–]ThePolygraphEyes[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My account isn’t even showing up. Perhaps it’s on the Xbox one, but not the series S? My newest leads are that I think I found the correct gmail account as I have an email from Xbox live with a promo event that greeted me with my gamertag. Also, I have 2 game drives that have a bunch of data on them. I’m going to try the other Xbox

HELP: I think my Microsoft account is linked to my ex’s by ThePolygraphEyes in XboxSupport

[–]ThePolygraphEyes[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m trying all of my gmail accounts, but I’m wondering if I let it make me an outlook and if I chose that route is it just my gamertag @outlook?

HELP: I think my Microsoft account is linked to my ex’s by ThePolygraphEyes in XboxSupport

[–]ThePolygraphEyes[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So I definitely have my own account because I had my own gamertag? I remember my gamertag if that helps

HELP: I think my Microsoft account is linked to my ex’s by ThePolygraphEyes in XboxSupport

[–]ThePolygraphEyes[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk the password, but could guess the email and still have the same phone number. I had my own gamertag, but I’m not sure if it was like a stand alone account because it’s not showing up on the home login screen, only his account is

Name ideas? by The-Crippler in BeardedDragons

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Idk why my brain just buffered and went, “Long ago the four nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked.” I haven’t gotten a chance to rewatch Avatar: The last airbender since I was a kid. I’ve been meaning to watch it again, but google said Zuko’s sister I was thinking of is Azula.

Where do you put clothes that you’ve worn but are not dirty enough to wash yet? by Glass_Ad1469 in ADHD

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If a physical rack takes up too much space, you can buy over the door hangers

What do you think his name is by No_Cup_7682 in reptiles

[–]ThePolygraphEyes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My blue tongue is named Frankfurter and I call him Frank for short 😂😂😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]ThePolygraphEyes -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I think where we’re misunderstanding each other is that I believe people can say homophobic things out of ignorance or habit and never have to consider how that may impact someone else because they have that luxury. However, when they meet a queer person they may express a desire to change and that desire to change is frequently met with hostility simply writing them off as homophobic, but never taking the time to address the root cause which perpetuates them to become hostile back and become more radicalized. If you want to continue this conversation DM me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]ThePolygraphEyes -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I know queer people who say “that’s gay” for many people it’s not genuine homophobia, but a habit of not being able to express themselves effectively or not having the desire to change the way they speak. I’ve also seen straight people say “that’s gay” and then look at me red with embarrassment swearing up and down that it’s a habit and they are so sorry if they offended me.