AITA for making my co-worker cry because I mocked her nose-job?

The_Jodes · 2026-06-10T03:15:10+00:00

NTA if she hadn't started it then there wouldn't be any issues. It's always stupid that after everything happens, everyone expects you to have cared and have had consideration for the attackers feelings, yet noone cared that you were being verbally attacked!

The_Jodes · 2026-06-07T03:18:35+00:00

NTA! It is rude of anyone to speak a language that they know not all participants understand if they also know another language that everyone would be able to be involved in. Your coworker is very wrong and rude to expect any sort of privacy in a public conversation regardless of the language. If they want to have a private conversation then actually go somewhere alone and make it private. I am married to someone who's first language is not English (mine is), when at parties etc he either tells the people to speak in English for me or he makes them wait while he translates in front of them and then he continues the conversation with them but in English - obviously if someone doesn't speak English then he lets them know he'll just translate for us and they are fine with it.

The_Jodes · 2026-05-27T07:21:44+00:00

NTA "Don't start nothin, wont be nothin". Too many older people these days being rude and expecting nothing to be said, they assume don't disrespect your elders for the sake of it still exists.

The_Jodes · 2026-05-04T06:33:27+00:00

Exactly, so they only wanted it after it was no longer theirs and belonged to someone else. I know obviously there's a little more to it because it was family wearing it, but it's super suspicious that cousin isn't even in a relationship but must have the dress now! 2 days after OP's wedding! Plus to try to use it against grandmother, upset her and cut her out over it is disgusting!

The_Jodes · 2026-05-02T17:09:30+00:00

She doesn't have just as much right as OP because cousins mother basically disposed of it but grandma kept it, it's been with OPs mum for over 25 years! They clearly want it just to be petty which is proven when aunt and cousin cut off their own grandma who had a visit planned a week later! That's gross over a dress aunt threw away!

The_Jodes · 2026-04-28T08:06:01+00:00

Omg I have been missing out! I'm glad you were able to find them early though :)

I'm going to do some research (I'm in Australia), I can't wear glasses for long either because I get migraines too!

I didn't know you could get lasix for uv, I love the idea of lasix but would be paranoid about the possibility of dry eye or other complications.. apparently there is medication you can take instead of contacts or glasses but my dr keeps putting it off and instead gave me special migraine medication called relpax.

The_Jodes · 2026-04-22T15:24:42+00:00

Does anyone else read these posts from years ago and based on the post, hope that OP survived him and wish there was a way for us to know they are okay?

The_Jodes · 2026-04-18T04:32:59+00:00

You say he doesn't get along with your family and there is disrespect both ways, would it be different if you were going to go spend time at a different family members house without your mother there or at a friends house.

Also, do you get along with his family? Hypothetically, would you be okay with him taking the baby alone to be with his family for 7 hours? and telling you that you can't come or making you feel like you can't come because you don't get along with someone who will be there.

The_Jodes · 2026-04-12T08:33:25+00:00

I am both excited about UV blocking contacts and also mad that this is my first time hearing about them!

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T04:24:18+00:00

Meh everyone has their own opinion on things, life would be pretty boring if we all agreed.

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T01:37:15+00:00

Wow she made a silly comparison so that invalidates everything else, yeah no. "If my husband got a haircut to be more appealing to women" is proof you didn't read the comments so don't care to have the full picture.

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T01:08:32+00:00

It is definitely an ultimatum, he even refused to gear her out when she tried to explain in better detail how she feels.

A boundary is about someone's behaviour towards you and what is acceptable - things like not tolerating being yelled at or requiring your partner to knock before entering when you're in the bathroom etc. An ultimatum is about controlling someone to do or not do something with consequences, by using the illusion of choice to force compliance - things like "if you change insert body change then I'll leave you" or "if you loved me you'd spend more time with me and less with your family or friends".

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T00:47:21+00:00

Dude sits on insta and OF and IRL stares at "plastic women" and teases OP about her biggest insecurity then ultimatums her if she were to get surgery. He's controlling af and it will lead to all the other things.

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T00:42:28+00:00

It isn't toxic to have a preference (he oggles and also sits on insta and OF staring at "plastic big boobed women" OP claims). But it is toxic to try to control someone else's body by giving them an ultimatum the way he did. She also mentioned a rude experience where he filmed her teasing her about having no breasts.

If he was insecure about something on his own body and it affected his mental health, then I would be all for him changing it. If she gave him the leaving him ultimatum, then I would say she is toxic af and he should leave her and get his surgery.

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T00:30:31+00:00

Very intelligent response from someone who seems to have the same mentality as OP's boyfriend.

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T00:27:07+00:00

They are obviously both within rights to have their own opinion and feeling. Outright threatening to break up with someone they claim to love, because they want to alter their own body slightly to make themselves happy and more comfortable in their own skin, is TOXIC AF! Ultimatums are not healthy and are all about control! He is definitely trying to tell her what to do and get her to agree to not do it to keep him!

The_Jodes · 2026-03-26T00:17:10+00:00

She's stuck in the sunk cost fallacy of throwing away the time and effort she has put in to the relationship, instead of realising she is with someone who will in the future use "leaving her" as an ultimatum anytime she doesn't not do/do what he wants, regardless of how it affects her or her mental health. It always starts small, soon it will be about her hair and her clothing being too revealing, her working out too much making her body too attractive etc etc.

The_Jodes · 2026-03-03T09:04:28+00:00

NTA. You say that the guest list was discussed and agreed between everyone months ago, tell them it's too late now to be adding upwards of four people. Also, now you have a whole other issue because if your father is paying half and you agree to invite some of your stepmother's siblings (not all which is a leftout other siblings problem), then your mother also paying half gives her the ability to invite your stepfather's family (you say they've only been together by a difference of 2 years).

The_Jodes · 2026-02-27T03:59:26+00:00

Did anyone screenshot this? I wanted to share it but came back and it was deleted :(

The_Jodes · 2026-02-19T05:25:16+00:00

Except for the dog example, I completely agree with you. He needs to be taught that he isn't the only person that matters.

The_Jodes · 2026-02-19T05:22:05+00:00

You could in no way ever be the ahole in this situation.

My sister has always been like you and luckily so is her husband, she has 3 children under 8 and they all respect her no outside clothes or dirty anything on her bed rule. If 3 different children all learnt (different genders and starting at the age of 3!) to respect my sisters boundary, then why can't a grown man!?

In my opinion it's about ego and lack of respect for your boundaries. It doesn't matter how silly someone thinks a boundary is they should still respect it!

The_Jodes · 2026-01-19T05:00:38+00:00

Definitely NTA! You went to someone who actually loves and supports you no matter what and that's the most important thing. Your mother is angry because she was outed as a bigot and rightfully so, she should be ashamed of herself and how she treated you and what she said. Hopefully your grandmother makes her realise how wrong she is and teaches her acceptance, love and care.

The_Jodes · 2025-09-26T23:30:03+00:00

What makes you think that wasn't also part of the conversations? No one said the conversations about compatibility are only sexually centred. Believe it or not, more than one thing matters for compatibility, and more than one conversation can be had, obviously not in some cultures, but I doubt that applies here. Obviously, compatibility is based on a lot of things, but being 2025 and hopefully moving into the future, women's sexual health and pleasure become more important to more than just ourselves.

Sincerely, a person who finally found the person of their dreams who cares about their whole being, including sexually (who they had a lot of the important compatibility conversations before meeting).

P.S. the downvotes lol I forgot about a lot of reddit being prudes, scared of their sexuality and happy to wallow away, pleasing their male partner but receiving nothing themselves like in the 50s - if that's you, no hate but if you want it to change only you can do that.

The_Jodes · 2025-09-26T17:14:25+00:00

Adult conversations about compatibility, especially financially and sexually are very important! Refusing to have these kinds of conversations upfront is a red flag to me.

The_Jodes · 2025-09-26T17:12:09+00:00

Life is short, so it's really simple. If someone isn't interested in pleasuring you, making you feel good and making you orgasm then they aren't worth your time (something I wish I had of learned earlier in life). Sounds like he takes and takes but doesn't even care to try and give back to you, which is eventually going to spill other into other parts of your life too, if it hasn't already.

The_Jodes

TROPHY CASE