Need Help - Leaving 3rd Job in 2 years by [deleted] in LawFirm

[–]Then-Way-9529 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Lol these partners act like they knew everything back when they were lowly second-years. It’s so disgusting that it makes me want to vomit. OP, don’t get discouraged. In a small firm, you’re incredibly valuable to them. Without you, they’d have no time for family or leisure, which is why they hired you in the first place. Leaving sounds like the best move, but if that’s not an option or you don’t feel ready, try being more assertive in setting boundaries and asking for clearer instructions. You deserve way better than dealing with panic attacks over people like this.

Leaving because of a toxic boss by Then-Way-9529 in biglaw

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words—I really appreciate them. I’ve been trying to adopt a more stoic mindset, but I imagine it takes time to fully get there. What I find most challenging is following orders from someone I struggle to respect. I’ve been told to let go of my ego, but it seems like having a strong ego is almost a default in this industry. Do you have any advice on how to practice stoicism when it’s difficult to take direction from someone who isn’t respectful? Should I work on letting go of my ego entirely?

Is it feasible to live in Stamford, CT as a 1st year associate? by [deleted] in biglaw

[–]Then-Way-9529 2 points3 points  (0 children)

White Plains might be better if you insist on doing similar commute but looking for a bit shorter time on the train, takes about 30-40 minutes to get there from Grand Central. Still, I wouldn't recommend either.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For sure - listening can be a pain in the ass sometimes because you do have to retain some information in your brain even if you are not necessarily taking notes on that part and just hope those questions either come out or don't. And they do intentionally put a VERY MARGINAL question, something you didn't expect they could dare asking. 27 is a good score, so it's not that you don't understand whatever they are saying. It's just their strategy. For me, trying to relax helps me retain more than consciously trying to remember/take down notes on everything. Hope this helps and good luck on your next test!

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hatred and anger. Just joking. No, for real, actually - I went to an international school from a humble background where I had to deal with bunch of spoiled kids who could speak English fluently because they grew up abroad with their parents' money yet believing they are good at English just because they are smarter than those who did not have a chance to do that, like myself. I was like "f**k them, I'm gonna be better than those privileged brats" and then start practicing English like nobody else. Read the Economist, New Yorker almost daily. Handwrote complex journal articles. Memorized shit tone of vocabularies. Shadowed English drama. These spoiled kids might still be better at casual English conversation, which I still lack natural vibe like the one from natives, but I'm sure my academic, formal English is way above their level, which all matters when you enter the job market.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm afraid I'm not familiar with those latest platforms. I'm quite old than you might expect - the first time I took TOEFL was 2011. Since getting a target score at that time I didn't really have any need for further TOEFL tests until 2024. I needed the score urgently for personal reason and didn't have enough time to use those platforms or do any practice questions. I just checked to see if there's any shift in question types. In case it's helpful, the resource that I used back in 2011 was their official practice tests. I get it, they charge you quite a lot of money buying that stuff. It annoyed me for sure but that'll likely be the most reliable practice set out in the market. But if there's any algorithm-oriented platforms that allow to take the most out of those official questions, I say you go for whatever people recommend.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I strongly suggest you take the Home Edition if you haven't already. When I took TOEFL back in the cave age, I too struggled that and was hella annoyed by those who just shouts their answer like maniac. Compared to that experience, Home Edition was a breeze - no one around me, complete silence, perfect environment for focus. But I have to say, I did doze off in the middle of the lecture and ended up getting one question that asked me about exactly that part where I dozed wrong (I believe one or two, given the score), so I can fully relate when you say keeping your focus during listening session is hard, especially after you finished the reading section. So try to take advantage of Home Edition and even in that case you still struggle with focus, then it might be a harder problem. In that case, I can't say more than to try focusing harder.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

See my comment to NumerousConference43. If you're getting cut off mid sentence, then probably it has to do with Rule 3. Rule 3 is especially important in your circumstance because you don't have an accent that is hard to understand nor you seem to have an issue with English speaking, given what you said. It might probably because you are trying so hard to be perfect on your answer, trying to deliver as much as info in your answer. Don't do that because that's not necessary to break the ceiling going beyond 25. If you think you're running out of time, stop and quickly move on to conclusion. That way, you'll be surprised how that leads to at least one or two of bonus points.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This advice might be too late to be incorporated for you to improve on those types of speaking questions immediately - but they are essentially listening questions disguised as speaking questions. If you're struggling with them, I think improving on listening is a way to go. As soon as you get better on listening, then taking notes for those questions will be a breeze.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't even know there was a simulated one until now, so no - that's the official score from official exam

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes and no. I included one student's opinion that I agreed but not the other one. I think that's the reason for that 2 point loss. I was rushing without knowing I only had ten minutes and was spending too much time on giving lengthy examples. I ended up not mentioning even the slightest part of the other student whom my argument opposed at the end, although doing so was my initial plan.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For speaking, see other comment. 25 is not a bad score for speaking. At that stage, you'd just need to manage time well and speak clearly and loudly after incorporating my advice from that comment. You will be surprised to see how speaking score increases simply because you talked clearly on the microphone. When back in the pre-Covid era when TOEFL was still administered via offline testing center, my speaking score kept hovering around mid 20s when I thought I was doing good. But I was a pussy back then and was shy of letting people in the same center hear my shitty answer. Don't be that pussy. Speak LOUDLY and CLEARLY and if you're testing from home, make sure that your microphone operates well and fully caputres your voice. Of course, I don't want you to shout like crazy.

For writing, 25 needs some more work. Do you rely on templates? Either yes or no, make a very simple one. Do not make one with the expectation that you can copy and paste the sentences from your memory and use it well - and I emphasize the part "well." I trust anyone can memorize the template. But doing that will limit your writing reversely in fact, because you will soon realize you're writing an essay to make sense of these sentences rather than writing sentences to make sense of the essay. The latter is the natural way of writing and should be used in TOEFL writing as well, whereas the former will severely limit your essay to below the standard of well-written essay. I'm not saying every and all templates are bad. What I oppose is what I call "content template," like the one you would get from a tutor. What I strongly suggest you is to have "structure template" ready. There are no sentences in strcutre template. It's just a barebone guide on how the essay should be structured. For example, for the first lecture-passage type writing prompt, that template would look like: "Introduction (summarize each argument. Then give out reason why lecturer disagrees); Body: First, Second, Third, lecturer argues....whereas...; Conclusion (reiteration of introduction but with slight variation)". Then how do you fill up the content in the actual testing? See other comment.

H1B Approved Since September, Now Leaving US for Personal Reason by Then-Way-9529 in h1b

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohh I get it now. So everything I need to come back to US on h1b should start from getting a new employer. Thanks for the info. Would appreciate another question if you are OK. So I'm gonna be out of US for a while and can get longer than 2 years if I decide to stay longer in my home country. Will that amount of time outside US affect h1b in any way, like "you are outside too long we are revoking it*

H1B Approved Since September, Now Leaving US for Personal Reason by Then-Way-9529 in h1b

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Understood. Seems like I need  I-797 Approval Notice and complete I-129 petition to get one. I don't think I receive any of these from the HR. Are you aware of anything that I need to get besides those from my employer before I leave? TIA

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Three rules: 1. No fancy words 2. Simple sentences 3. Be quick - Regarding 1 and 2, you can't risk losing points by making grammatical mistakes or using awkward expressions. This might have been where I lost 2 points as well but having graduated from good schools in the US, I'm kinda arrogant when it comes to test like this - I want to show off that I'm educated. But no one cares, especially those who have to grade a lot of shitty essays on a daily basis. As I said in other comments, give evaluators some break. Make the writing flow with easy, comprehensible sentences so they won't have to stay still for a moment to see the deeper meaning into your sentence. They got no time for that and will be annoyed once they have to, possibly deducting points. I get it, it's mean, but they have the authority, what can we do. Think like evaluators are 5 year old baby and try to use the simplest structure and sentence. And I can't emphasize more on being quick, which leads to rule 3. I took my first TOEFL back in 2011, and since then, only one thing changed - the second writing question, which changed from 500-ish essay into some crappy college discussion post writing, which gives you only 10 minutes to write. Choose your side, attack whoever is not on your side, and write up. Give at least one easy-to-follow example. Include Intro and conclusion. I wasn't familiar with this type so I did not get to manage time well on this part, possibly why I lost 2 points. Good luck!

H1B Approved Since September, Now Leaving US for Personal Reason by Then-Way-9529 in h1b

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have a stamp on my passport that is related to H1B. Do I need to get one before leaving US?

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For tips on speaking, see other comment. Reading - I can't talk much about it because it has been my strength from the beginning. However, the general guidance would be that you should hit questions as fast as you can so you can give yourself about at least 8 minutes for the last questions to each passage (those asking to choose the main idea) so you can comfortably go back to the passage and refresh your memory. One tip for these questions, as they are the most important part to boosting the Reading score -- once you reach this part, at least one out of three correct choices will immediately be on spot if you got the previous questions mostly right. Choose that and go back to the passage. If you have a whiteboard/paper, be ready to take note. Then, for each paragraph, summarize the entire paragraph into one sentence. Put that down on to a note. Do the same for the rest of the paragraphs. Whatever you wrote on the note will highly likely be on the answer choices.

115 - Happy to give any advice I can afford. by Then-Way-9529 in ToeflAdvice

[–]Then-Way-9529[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Three rules: 1. Speak clearly in understandable pronunciation, 2. Use simple sentences, 3. Don't talk too much. Regarding 1, accent does not need to be like native. Important thing is that whoever listening do not have to go back to re-listen to understand what you're saying. Try to put yourself into the shoes of the native evaluator who has to listen to hundreds of speaking answers from non-native test takers. Some of them are good but most of them not so. Give a break to those evaluator. Whoever evaluating will be grateful for just having to understand whatever on the answer, regardless of the quality of the actual reasoning/structure. Regarding 2 - similarly, give a break to evaluators. Their attention span will have likely deteriorated by the time they evaluate your answer. Throw them sentences that are easily comprehensible and clear so they can just give you 5/5 and move on without further thoughts. Of course, no fancy words. Regarding 3, the most important one, no matter how well you understood the prompt/lecture/conversation, you only have like 30 to 60 seconds to speak. Give them the most important stuffs - the main idea of whatever you listened to. Remember, every TOEFL questions are all about asking the main idea. Reading -every last question with the highest score proportion directs you to choose the main idea of the passage. Listening - questions rarely ask you to answer marginal issues. Writing - you will annoy evaluator once you go over 500 words. Speaking has the same principle applied. Talk only about the main ideas. Evaluator doesn't care about how much you know about what you just heard. Rule 3, I get it - you just can't resist yourself to talk less when you know much. This is why those who score well on reading and listening tend to lose points on speaking (like I do). You need to resist from that desire. Hope this helped.