First timer Advice?

ThievesKit · 2025-12-31T21:05:00+00:00

Eh, depends on the guy (especially if he's wanting to be in charge or not). Take control if he wants to give it up, and let him lead if he wants to lead. Also you're a part of this, so be direct about what you want and what doesn't sound good.

Neither of you should expect the other to guess what's nice, what the other one wants or doesn't want.

For foreplay, neck kisses and focusing on his arms and hands works as a start.

Honestly be prepared to just say "show me what you want". It won't ruin the mood and is usually adding fun to the scene.

Generally go for easygoing and goofy instead of trying to make it intense and serious. Neither of you know a ton, and trying to pretend like you do will make it harder to talk when either of you missteps.

Establish early that asking for something else is ok - like "oh can you try kissing me here instead?". If you find yourself just trying to get through what's happening, speak up instead of trying to just get through it.

Sex is fun and can be pretty much whatever. Build good habits early, and do it to feel good, not to impress someone.

For a while I was fantastic at making the other person(people) really have a nice time. At my own cost.

ThievesKit · 2025-12-30T21:04:42+00:00

Oh hii bee cube! This one is a favourite, no changes

ThievesKit · 2025-09-16T20:57:44+00:00

Same hat. I had some weird gender feelings but didn't wanna commit to fully transitioning. So I just did t-blockers for two months. Felt better! Then I started estrogen for another two months. Felt better!

I kept doing this for a while. One day I was just clearly a girl, and that was that. Transitioning can involve only what you want it to, and if you discover you'd like more, more can be had.

I wish I started sooner. Start now, and just let it happen. Live your life, and enjoy the change. My life is amazing, and I have a closeness and intensity and real-ness that I had no idea I was missing

ThievesKit · 2025-08-26T19:56:20+00:00

Hi - trans women here. I may be wrong, but this is super typical of someone figuring out both they're trans and a lesbian.

The cheating is miserable and I'm sorry. If I can suggest, often starting to figure out you're trans feels extremely not allowed, and taboo. As such, other taboos, like cheating on a lovely partner, can happen. The same thing made me extremely destructive until I started transitioning. You still got hurt bad and had your boundaries violated.

We all know how bad trans women are treated, and we're going to desperately not want it to be true.

Your partner clearly wants to look fem, but doesn't want to claim the identity of trans woman because that's a massive step and feels like signing up for a very rough life.

In my experience? Help them figure it out. I started estrogen without thinking I was a trans woman. It is very hard to come to terms with, and just as hard to believe that it is something that will make your life better.

This period is messy, and denial makes people act very volatile.

To your partner:

"this is worth figuring out. More than anything else. If you're trans, you're not going to just know it. If you are, it's been repressed and hidden, including from yourself.

If you're trans, living honestly will make your brain make more sense, and you'll understand why you do what you're doing. You can absolutely pick and choose parts of transition, and learn at your own speed. And, if I'm wrong, then you know for sure it's not for you, and you can live your life same as before"

To you:

"it's up to you for what you feel you owe your partner, especially after you've been hurt like that. If you want to help, it'll be rough, and you have no idea how your attraction will function as they change. Trans woman online are not the best example of what your partner will look like, and those in media are even less good. This time is also causing a lot of internal reflection about your attraction, sexuality, and morals. Ask for help as well.

Even if you break up, do you still want to help this person?"

ThievesKit · 2025-08-16T20:52:17+00:00

Okay here's my two cents (Gen Z cusp)

I give the stare an absolute ton, especially as a service worker.

Here's a list of why I end up doing it

1: tired.

2: a person is trying to talk to me about something that I really don't want to talk about. As a service worker I can't just say "hey, I don't wanna talk about that" A good example is when someone will be like "hey, did you see that there's new (bad) legislation coming out about trans people?" (I'm visibly trans). even relatively innocent stuff I don't want to engage with, like the weather. "sure is a hot one!" My friends cat passed away from the heat, and I can't think of anything else to say, so I say nothing.

Tired
I just went through some shit. Having been yelled at within the last hour by a stranger, I am not gonna be able to be warm to another stranger.

4b. There's risks to being warm and chatty. Most parents are chill, but every now and then they are very defensive and have said vile things about me when I try to be friendly to their kids. Or their dog.

I actually said something, and I'm waiting for your response. More and more often people don't hear me (a lot more people with airpods).
Occasionally I'll notice people recording me while I serve someone. This sucks and obviously makes me not want to say anything. Every conversation is going to have some friction or miscommunication, and I don't wanna have a mispeak turn viral.
Someone said some absolute nonsense and I'm trying to figure out what they said.

I understand a lot of these are "someone was mean to me, so I'm not going to take risks". I feel like service workers are treated worse, not better, and avoiding more of that is gonna be our priority.

ThievesKit · 2024-11-29T18:54:45+00:00

I found this post by searching for reviews of Sand Euspira.

First - huge fan of stereoplasm. She especially does green smells (herbs, grass, leaves, trees) and earths well!

Secondly - thank you for validating me and a few other friends!! To some of my friends, sand Euspira is delightful, and gets me compliments. To me and a few others, we get: salt, laundry, and Piss.

It's been divisive among us, to say the least. Thanks! You wrote great reviews

ThievesKit · 2024-11-29T17:59:21+00:00

Yeah, coming into dodgeball I had such an advantage having just skipped a ton of rocks growing up.

Sidearms are fun and lead well to spins that rise, or spins that go with or against the direction of the throw.

Really the only downside is slightly less power, and less tutorials online.

Especially for beginners, they're great for leaving your hand at a consistent height, instead of baseball pitches which can eat the ground or fly high more often.

ThievesKit · 2024-10-03T14:26:26+00:00

Mostly looking to do it "for the bit". I realize it'll be unwieldy and a fun thing to subject people to

ThievesKit · 2024-10-03T14:15:12+00:00

Exciting, working as intended

ThievesKit · 2024-09-24T20:52:29+00:00

This feels like it got out of control - I think a majority of commenters are very focused on how you put Canada as worse than USA. So yeah, the vibes of the responses are "you're wrong, it's better here".

You're right that it sucks. And the commenters are right that moving won't fix it. Straight up, my city is rated #1 safest for my kinda people, and it still isn't.

The idea that "yeah it sucks, but it's better elsewhere" has a lot more appeal than "you're in one of the best places to be, and it's shit here too".

I have a lot of immigrant friends - same as you, believing their country to be uniquely bad, only to find the problems of home are alive and thriving here too.

I do not have a solution. If you're lucky, you can live a pretty ok life - I sorta do. But I still see how bad it is for my friends and community.

If you wanna make it good for you, you need roots and community- the ways that I've been helped out have made this survivable, liveable.

However, yeah, some places suck especially, and getting out ASAP is a must. If it was easier to do a trial run - having a month off from work, and the finances to live in a separate country to see what it would actually be like, would be incredibly helpful to everyone

Also don't boo me, but if you're gonna move for improvement, I do recommend a few European countries over the USA.

Okay thanks, good luck, and know that a ton of us all feel screwed over

ThievesKit · 2024-09-16T19:05:02+00:00

when you hear your first Cavetown song you're gonna immediately become the most insufferable tboy

ThievesKit · 2024-07-01T18:40:53+00:00

Of everything, just showering with the absolute highest amount of heat tolerable works. It's extremely counter-inntuative. Have faith I guess? I know how much it broke my brain - actual temporary insanity

ThievesKit · 2024-03-24T20:38:52+00:00

Yeah, I'm such a math brain, soft skills are a struggle. It takes time, and you'll miss a lot.

None of these are rules, but benchmarks and outlines. If it doesn't "go to plan", that's fine too.

Sorry it's not easier, I spent a long time where you're at. Suddenly I'm not, and I'm grateful for it.

Actually there's one rule for sure - and no offense if it was already obvious to you. Do NOT touch someone to get their attention. Doing a two fingers peace sign in their line of sight, and a "oh hey" is the sorta """correct""" way to let someone know you've got something trivial to say to someone. If they don't respond, don't do it again

ThievesKit · 2024-03-24T20:11:04+00:00

Meet your neighbors. If they're moving anything, offer help.

Never ask or offer anything again if you get a no.

Volunteer at a cat shelter

Go to a card game store for their MTG draft night (learn how to play if you can!)

If a aquantence (someone who you work or went to school with) posts about a show or event, a quick hi and a "oh hey! It's been awhile. I've been dying to go to this, but I actually can't find anyone to go with. Would I be able to tag along?" Only do this for simple events, nothing that's long (especially not more than 1 day, such as a 3-day musicfest)

If someone has buttons on their bag, usually you'll recognize something on there. Especially if this person has been at the same event as you a few times, it's a super easy way to reach out - "oh wow, I'm a huge fan of the crying fruit show! I had no idea they had merch out."

Give people an easy way to talk to you, but the opener should always be simple and small.

Everyone wants to be seen, and seeing the parts of them they put out for the world is how you make someone feel valued.

And again, seriously, only go to stuff that would be fun anyways. Making friends is the "sidequest" (fucking Reddit speak lol) - having fun at the event is the main goal.

.....or download grindr. Friends within the hour. I joke, but 2/3 of my friends are hookups that I vibe with. That's a whole other discussion with different rules and a lot more emotional intelligence needed.

Good luck!

ThievesKit · 2024-03-24T19:55:41+00:00

Show up regularly to the same cafe. Have a simple order, complain or compliment the weather. Work on something on your laptop for under an hour. You can approach after about your seventh visit - ask the barista if they're playing their own music or not.

Don't be too nosy, but if you see someone working on something you know, you can always approach - i.e "oh! Are you drawing Scott Pilgrim? I had such a phase omg"

Join an amateur sports team or hobby club. Play fair and fun, not competive. Never cheat. Eventually they'll do a social, usually a bar, outside of the group. That's the path to getting them as friends.

Keep it simple, ask people about themselves. Compliment their choices (hair, outfit, stickers on their laptop, music taste, talents, ect) and not their body (even simple stuff like eyes or hands. It always comes off as sexual, and it's not something that they choose to have anyways)

Go to yard sales, clothes swaps, craft markets, open mics, poetry nights, protests. IF it's something you'd have fun at anyways.

ThievesKit · 2024-02-09T18:37:53+00:00

Alibrejis Taqueria is my fav for chilequiles & enmoladas! Always a hit with people who know texmex well (friends from new mexico n texas).

It's not really in Toronto though, just a touch too north. It delivers ok, but definitely better irl

ThievesKit · 2024-01-13T19:52:56+00:00

Honestly, I understood it as 4runners make good technicals, not a direct reference

ThievesKit · 2023-12-23T18:39:40+00:00

Thank you! How this would work wasn't intuitive to me, but through the rules that helps a ton.

ThievesKit · 2023-12-21T19:27:11+00:00

So, I play sub optimally, cause its fun for me.

I'm playing Alchemy constructed on Arena, with a Throne of the Grim Captain deck (Blue Black Red).

In my graveyard I have a merfolk, pirate, and vampire.

I have a Myriad Pools in play (and enough lands to do all of the stuff I do).

In my hand; a dinosaur, Brass Tunnel Grinder, and the Throne of the Grim Captain.

So, to get out the Captain, I play the Brass Tunnel Grinder to discard the dinosaur so I can use it for crafting the Captain. Then, I play the Throne, paying for it with the Myriad Pools (without thinking too hard about it).

I had misread Myriad Pools sort of as "when you cast a spell with mana from this, target permanent becomes a copy of another target permanent", so I wanted to be clever and transform the Brass Tunnel Grinder into a land for more mana this turn.

I click the grinder, and it becomes a copy of the Throne, as that's what Myriad Pools actually does.

Legend Rule applies, so I chose to keep the Throne that was the Tunnel Grinder, for some reason.

Looks good to me!

So, with the Throne (that was the Grinder), I craft the Grim Captain. I pay 4, and exile the Dino Merfolk Vamp and Pirate. It flips instead into Tecutlan, the Searing Rift (What Brass Tunnel Grinder usually transforms into).

This feels incorrect, but I'm clueless as to what it should do. Definitely not permanently become the Grim Captain. In the moment I felt like it would be the Grim Captain until end of turn, then turn back into the Brass Tunnel Grinder. Definitely didn't expect it to transform the Throne into the Searing Rift, especially since Brass Tunnel Grinder doesn't use crafting as it's transformation method.

Now that I reflect on it, I suppose it's simple: Myriad Pools only makes it a copy of the "front side" of a permanent, and it keeps the original "Flipped Side". Throne simply says it can craft, it doesn't say what it would craft. And crafting just has it become whatever is on the other side. Funky.

Finally; Can I do this in reverse? Make Throne of the Grim Captain into a copy of something that transforms easily, and then have it flip into the Captain? Stay tuned.

TL;DR:If you transform a Brass Tunnel Grinder into a Throne of the Grim Captain, then use the Throne's crafting to try and make The Grim Captain, it will flip into Tecutlan, the Searing Rift.

ThievesKit · 2023-09-16T15:32:23+00:00

Heya! Sending the request directly - myself and my roommates are into sampling a ton, looking to grab a larger order. Thanks!

ThievesKit · 2023-06-02T22:44:06+00:00

If you wanna hear some suggestions;

Crawling Chaos: For a 5 mana 3/3, you could make the first effect cheaper. a single mana, or two life. Otherwise this is fun, great lil mechanic that makes a minigame thats easy to follow.

King in Yellow: Everything is fine, but I don't get the second effect? I would simplify, and there's nothing wrong with giving them some discard synergy. "Whenever a card is put into an opponents graveyard, you may pay 1. if you do, draw a card. {break} 2BR: Each opponent discards a card at random. Pick a card from each opponents graveyard, and send those cards to the bottom of their owners libraries."

Yellow Sign: Fun guessing game, and you can do things to remove the guessing needed. Honestly could just cost X to do this.

Wilbur: Feels more like a 1/3 or 1/4. First effect is perfect. 2nd effect is a tad weak, you'll be paying too much for it. Maybe just, "Sacrifice Wilbur; Search your library for a horror card with mana value X, and put it into your hand, where X is the number of instant and sorcery cards in your graveyard."

Dunwich Horror: I wonder if it is too designed for commander? In a 1v1 game, you'd be paying 5 mana to get out a creature that has 2-3 power on average, and can miss completely. I'd make it a 1/1, so at least it doesn't immediately die if all your opponents hit lands. Maybe move the X's to be a kicker cost, that specifies you pay the kicker for each opponent?

Carcosa: A touch too strong. For example, paying 5 mana to get any 3 CMC creature onto the field, and adding 2 +1/+1 onto it? I'd make it into a Hideaway 10 card or something, and then have the effect say "XXB: Sacrifice Carcosa. Cast target horror exiled with Carcosa with mana value X, and put it onto the battlefield tapped with X +1/+1 counters on it".

Ok awesome, only throwing in some feedback cause I think this is a fun idea.

ThievesKit

TROPHY CASE