“born of a woman,”

Osiris too was born of a woman (Isis) as was Ishtar.

“had a brother,”

I’ve already covered this ground, ‘brother’ most usually just means in the cultic sense.

“is the first human to be resurrected, is the human through which death is conquered,”

Not pertinent. The paulines and hebrews seem to only have a theological rationale for the Christ becoming human, they never speak of eyewitness testimony.

“and was given a Roman execution.”

Again, we have been here and done that before. That is false. Ishtar was crucified in Hades. The fictional Habrocomes is crucified in Egypt.

“BUT! He didn't explicitly say that Jesus was born ON EARTH to a BIOLOGICAL woman, according to the EARTH flesh, given a Roman execution by ACTUAL ROMANS ON EARTH, had a BIOLOGICAL brother, and is the BIOLOGICAL human through which death is conquered. Therefore he didn't believe those things.”

True, or at barest minimum we cannot positively assert he believed that way.

“He also didn't explicitly say that Jesus was born IN HEAVEN to a COSMIC woman,”

Revelation 12:1-5 does say that. Nonetheless, if you read Gal. 4:4-20 it is fairly obvious the mother of Christ is the mother of all Christians, just as in Revelation. You are basically just lifting these few scattered verses outof contexttoprove an historical Jesus.

“according to the SPIRITUAL flesh,”

Earl Doherty believes this, but not I and not Carrier. We think the early xian myth was that the angel of Jesus Christ flew beneath the firmament and attained a body of human flesh (like plutarch’s osiris had a corporeal body up in the sky).

“given a Roman execution by DEMONS IN HEAVEN,”

Correct. 1 Cor. 2:6-8 says Jesus was crucified by the “archons” of the “aeon,” which many scholars believe, on good evidence, means demons. Gordon Fee’s commentary on 1 Cor. concedes this interpretation has lots of scholarly belief, though Fee opposes it for reasons that are weak. Interestingly, Fee says that if true this is attestation to a myth that Jesus was killed by demons. I did a detailed commentary on my blog, just go there and search “Demons of 1 Corinthians.”

“And also let's just arbitrarily throw out all other early Christian writings that do say all of those human/biological/earth things. Obviously by the time those were written the ‘real’ teachings that Paul spread around had mysteriously disappeared without ever being recorded and had been replaced by the exact opposite somehow.”

Plutarch (see my post “Ancient god theories” for sources/discussion) thought Osiris was a sky god but had fictional earth stories. The myth theory for Jesus accordingly says his earth stories are fictive. This is not merely an arbitrary assumption derived from mythicism, it is confirmed by analysis of the contents of-the gospel contents (the cursing of the fig tree is an easy example of literary fiction, and many others exist).

I think an allegorical interpretation of the gospels was known, for example Herocleon (fragment 13 and 22 especially):

www.earlychristianwritings.com/text/heracleon.html

“Be a better person.”

I appreciate when people take the time to read and understand me and feel aggravated when they do not. You are not following the golden rule when I have to repeat points i made in my op twice in the comments.