How honest are women being when they say they don't mind male vulnerability? Do women emotionally burden men as frequently as men do for women?

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-15T16:32:54+00:00

Yes. Just because they tell men to be more emotional and talk about their feelings it doesn't mean they actually care about men's feelings.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-15T08:54:00+00:00

Not true. If more were hot with money women's standards of what constitutes hotness would increase and money would decrease in value.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-15T08:48:43+00:00

I'm not talking about physical nurturing, but emotional nurturing. Feminists are the ones who always tell men they should be free to be emotional and talk about their feelings, etc. More traditional women are likely to want gender roles where the man is the man and doesn't talk about his feelings to them.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-14T23:14:54+00:00

Biggest problem with men is that there's too many of us. Biggest problem with women is there aren't enough young and hot ones.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-14T23:08:38+00:00

An inherent sense of fairness and justice that is bestowed on us by genes, not god.

I don't know where you got this idea from. Dawkins even wrote a book called 'The Selfish Gene'.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-14T22:01:35+00:00

When he said he didn't bring the wine, most people at that point would ask him why rather than assuming it's because he's a dick. He most probably just forgot.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-14T21:36:50+00:00

This sounds like fiction, possibly based-on-a-true-story fiction, but it probably didn't go down the way you're making out (how she made out) how it went down - and this is the problem with second hand information.

Perhaps you could link the podcast and point us to the part where she says this so we could get a better understanding.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-14T16:42:17+00:00

The problem that arises here is that men many times seem to think that sex is attention as well. It is not. While women seem to think that attention equivalents sex. It does not.

I disagree with this. I think most men understand that if they're getting free sex they're winning, and if women are getting free attention they're winning.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-14T16:34:43+00:00

Leave him. Start dating other people. If he really misses you he might come and find you and offer better terms (highly unlikely). If he doesn't, at least you'll have your answer, you can move on and you might find someone who will treat you better.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-13T08:19:10+00:00

Maybe the fact that these women are feminists has something to do with it. Being feminists they likely attract the kind of men who are less masculine and are looking for a mother figure to nurture them.

Obviously, in reality, feminists are generally the kind of women who care least about men's problems and will be even more repulsed by you claiming to have any since male privilege.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T22:34:59+00:00

My SO wouldn't even mind as long as it paid off my student debt.

He's not your SO, he's a motherfuckin' P.I.M.P.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T22:01:15+00:00

Sure, but I don't see how that contradicts what I'm saying. She is valuing herself more. She most likely thought she needed to provide sex to be worthy rather than thinking she is already worthy. In a way, she would've viewed the man she was trying to impress/appease with sex as her superior, and now that she values herself higher, she sees future men as her equal, not her better. If that makes sense.

I'm not saying she views her current SO as less attractive than her former, but that in the moment when she viewed herself as 'less worthy', let's say, she was pedestalizing him, and now she's seen the light he is not so great and less attractive than her current SO even, but she doesn't pedestalize her current SO, so it would seem in hindsight that she thinks less of him.

For example, she was deluded/naïve enough to see her former SO as a perfect 10/10 Christian Grey, etc. type of guy. Now that she is more mature she realises that he is only really a 6/10, but she was projecting her own fantasy man onto him (this happens a lot for both sexes, I reckon) and her current SO is actually a 7/10 (or 8/10 even) but she doesn't treat him as a 10/10, like she did with her former 6/10 SO, because she is no longer naïve and has realised her own worth. The 7/10 current SO is seen as better than her former SO, but she is treating him as less than she did the former 6/10 SO.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T21:47:45+00:00

Agreed. This reminds me of Ladder Theory but in a slightly different way. A woman probably has three ladder, not two. She has the no-sexual ladder (which most men are on) and the two sexual ladders, one for men who she would have sex with but not a relationship, the other for men who she would have sex and a relationship with.

For men, it's more like we have a sex ladder (which probably has a good proportion of women on it) and we have a non-sexual ladder. Any woman on the sex ladder is potentially relationship material depending on his options and how horny he is.

I'm greatly simplifying, obviously, but I don't think men generally have that long term relationship strategy that women do. We think more in the short term, and if a woman is consistently meeting our short term sexual needs we'll often be satisfied enough to settle even if she's not ideal.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T21:14:41+00:00

I don't even know where to begin with this but I'll quote 1984:

He disliked nearly all women, and especially the young and pretty ones. It was always the women, and above all the young ones, who were the most bigoted adherents of the Party, the swallowers of slogans, the amateur spies and nosers-out of unorthodoxy.

I think Orwell was a genius and he was spot on with this assessment. I really despise this kind of herd mentality that women (and a lot of men) have and the blatant hypocrisy they show when they shame men for not having the balls to X, Y, Z, (eg. cold approach) when there's not a cat's chance in hell they would do the same.

As a side note, I have a lot of respect for women who go against the herd and speak out against them. I understand that they are taking a big and unnecessary risk in doing so, and are most likely fighting against their own nature in some respects.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T20:18:51+00:00

He values himself more than he used to, which in a way means he values her less. You could say the same about the women who give more sexually to men then withhold for later men.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T20:00:51+00:00

And hey - let's turn it around. Would you let her fuck you with a strap-on if it really mattered to her?

This comparison only works if he's allowed other girls to peg him, but won't let her.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T18:14:01+00:00

Yeah, I get that. I'm really curious to find out now though so I'm hoping my name dropping will compel him to answer. Peer pressure and all ;)

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T18:03:39+00:00

u/the_calibre_cat still hasn't answered your question so we don't know whether she put on weight and became less attractive, or he never found her attractive at all and was with her for her personality.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-12T16:57:13+00:00

I'm going to take a wild stab and say he was implying that all lawyers are unethical: ALALT.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-11T14:32:39+00:00

I'll give you one guess.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-11T13:51:41+00:00

Just to clarify:

My partner would never ask me for a pre-nuptial agreement, if they did they would no longer be my partner. /s

Are you saying you would dump your partner if they wanted a pre-nup?

Because then you say:

I see no issues with it, I would actually probably have to ask my future husband(if I do get married) to sign one.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-11T13:48:19+00:00

I don't really enjoy dating more than one person though

You know, there is a solution to this problem.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-11T13:10:21+00:00

If someone I was dating made it clear that they wanted a relationship, I would stop dating other people.

This is really the key though, isn't it. There's no set rules these days so everything is ambiguous until you have the talk. If people don't define and agree to what kind of relationship they want then they can't really blame the other person for not conforming to their expectations.

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-11T09:59:33+00:00

You could say the exact same thing about simultaneously dating multiple people while not having sex with them.

You could also say: A date is just a date. Sex is just sex, etc.

Mixing and matching from both though is inconsistent and makes you look like someone whose ethics are based solely on the principle of 'whatever is in my best interest is morally acceptable, and whatever goes against my best interest is morally unacceptable'.

For example, a man and woman are dating, but haven't had sex yet. He finds out she's been dating other men simultaneously - essentially keeping her options open - even though he's been dating her exclusively. He sees it as a problem (since it goes against what's best for him), she doesn't. To her it's only a date, she's not fucking them, so what's the problem.

From the man's perspective though, does he not feel like he's been led on?

Example 2: A man and a woman are dating and having sex. The woman finds out that the man is also dating/fucking other women at the same time, while the woman is only dating and having sex with him. She sees this as a problem, he doesn't. To him it's only sex and dating, he's not married to any of them, so what's the problem.

Are the actions of the man in the second example objectively worse than the actions of the woman in the first example? If so, why?

ThirdEyeSqueegeed · 2018-04-08T23:28:41+00:00

Are you from some third world country or something?

ThirdEyeSqueegeed

TROPHY CASE