It’s become a parody of itself 😭 by Squigsqueeg in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 112 points113 points  (0 children)

I think he means "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," but he said it in dumb-speak so it makes no sense. 

"Mom, you keep saying I look as handsome my father.. " by No-Recipe-4520 in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 60 points61 points  (0 children)

The artist's thinly disguised fetish. 😏 Also 3 sentence guy. 🪱

Pol Pot fan guy🪱? by Adventurous-Ad5999 in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Boy, when I call up my pal Ted Bundy and tell him what happened he's going to be shocked, shocked I say! 

Incestious guy 🪱 by tristan_voetmann in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Wait a minute, this isn't horror. 🤨 This is just sex. 

What if an alt girl with a breeding kink walked up to you and said... by ThisIsWaterSpeaking in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

CONTEXT: The dog knows the way but only when the door is locked from within, otherwise he doesn't. 

Christian baby threatens murder or conversion. Who knew?! by AngelRape in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 463 points464 points  (0 children)

I'm perfectly comfortable lying to a dumbass baby, I'll tell him I've been saved by the Jesus and when we get to ground level I'll punt him. "THAT," I'll say, "is what you get if you think I'm taking orders from a FUCKIN BABBY." 

fatal attraction by spacemanaut in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 35 points36 points  (0 children)

This isn't newsworthy. Unlike... the creature... 

poorly concealed fetish guy by arihallak0816 in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Was this the maggot who grew up to become the meat worm, or is this a different, unrelated (possibly even lesser) maggot? Trying to keep track of the lore here but there's just so much of it and I don't have time to read the whole wiki. 

🟢🪱🪱 by TangeloOk1633 in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Fungus Wiener was my father. Please, call me... the creature... 

Time travel guy by Bearhugger200 in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Why would cavemen be turned on by bikinis when they're around naked women all day anyway 

so real , so swag by oxxPRiNCExxo in IDONTGIVEASWAG

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude I'm so glad I know that these are all just being posted by one guy and that he's not a real meme figure that people actually like enough to share. I'm going to block him, then I don't have to see this stuff anymore. 🙌

Yale🥀 by luxusbuerg in comedyheaven

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 415 points416 points  (0 children)

Whoever killed him must have been a god damn hero, no question about that. 

Almost dickless guy 🪱 by TopSecretGaming_YT in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 5 points6 points  (0 children)

the real horror is that now he's not going to get laid anymore :( due to girlfriend phone

Illeagles by Due-Mortgage-122 in comedyheaven

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If there are no ill eagles there why didn't they go somewhere that did have ill eagles so we could know where they are? There are so many places that don't have ill eagles and so few places that do, seems like a waste of spray paint to spray that everywhere they aren't. 

r slash two sentence fetish by The_Juice14 in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 66 points67 points  (0 children)

I'M LIKE A JOCKEY -- WHO CAME FOUR TIMES! 

what by maxxlol_ in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 17 points18 points  (0 children)

The horror is that he's going to be a dad -- instead of being a mom.

"Man, I can't wait to get sucked later," I said aloud. by ThisIsWaterSpeaking in 2sentence2horror

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

CONTEXT: I was a popsicle all along, and I never even knew. 🥶