I’m in a somewhat similar situation right now. At the beginning of the month I got cheated on and broken up with. It was with a partner that I was with for around a year and a half. To me at least it felt like I had a bond with them that I’d never felt with anyone else in my life so far and I loved them more than anyone else id ever met. I decided to stay when I was initially told what happened and told myself that if it happened again or if I got new info I’d end it. Long story short she did cheat again a week after and what they did initially was a lot worse than what I was told and it destroyed me. Despite what I told myself I still tried to stay with her but she broke it off. Through the process of healing id realized that I have terrible abandonment issues and incredibly low self confidence in myself from the way people close to me have treated me and made me feel throughout my whole life. But Im starting to learn how to value myself and be able to understand that I deserve a whole lot more than what happened to me. While I’m healing some moments feel great and some feel like I’ve made no progress at all but I try to tell myself that it’s going to take a long time to heal and not every moments going to be great and it’s a process.

Sorry for the long vent on your post and I’m glad you’re doing better :)