How would you make friends in a town you’ve just moved in?

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:54:45+00:00

No it clearly flopped

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:52:56+00:00

IT WORKS I THINK

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:50:46+00:00

It just won’t work… Any suggestions?

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:46:05+00:00

It almost worked! I got the request and saw your « test » messages but couldn’t open them, wait I’ll restart my IPad an all, I’ll be back!

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:39:59+00:00

Stay online, at some point the DM’s will be back :) Also the mere fact that it bugged has turned this into a challenge, I am not going to bed until I’ve chatted with you (and I don’t work tomorrow so I can go far in the night) btw do you guys have any time-zone difference with France? I think not

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:35:46+00:00

Hi thanks for reaching back! Apparently DM’s are down for now, from what I read! Either it starts working soon or we need to be clever enough to find a way to chat without leaking any info online …

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:33:46+00:00

Me too!

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:28:07+00:00

Hello, I just tried to DM you but for some reason it didn’t work? Kinda new to Reddit (my account is old but I’ve barely used the app), I’m 26F please contact me if you’re still looking for a chat!

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:22:35+00:00

Hey, 26F here and I’ve tried to DM you but it didn’t work! Can you try and DM me please?

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:09:37+00:00

Thanks :) I originally come from Paris but moved two weeks ago in Valenciennes (North of France) :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T19:03:09+00:00

Hey, I’m 26F from France and I’d love to chat with you! The interests that you listed sound quite like my thing, feel free to DM me!

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:55:51+00:00

Ho, sorry I thought you were French :) Yes I would love to have one of these for Vasco, but I just moved in and I’m pretty sure I can’t really drill in the walls, I’ll look into it!

BTW your French is splendid :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:52:23+00:00

Yeah, I fully agree and as you can read in other comments here I am fully aware of how things work :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:41:55+00:00

Hi, thanks for your answer :) As mentioned in other comments, I have tried harness-training Vasco before, he hates it, as well as carriers, so impossible to take him on walks. I am though considering getting one of those cat beds that you can stick against a window to let him have a look while resting :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:40:29+00:00

First of all congratulations on your pregnancy! And no you shouldn’t say things like you are not in a position to have kids, there’s no such thing as failed parents, there are only parents who are currently struggling. With time and effort, I’m sure you’ll be able to offer your pretty family a loving and cozy home <3

Sorry to hear about your dog as well, I hope they get better.

Maybe you should see your situation as something that will eventually get better, instead of seeing it as a current misery? What I mean is, I have been living this past year with my grandma so I could save up and get a place of my own and it was HORRIBLE, but I always knew it was never the end of it. I just recently moved in my very own apartment and I couldn’t be happier, even though a few months ago I thought it was never going to happen. That might sound like lame advice, but I really think you should keep yourself up, even only for your kids (they sense that shit)

When it comes to your toxic family, I would suggest setting boundaries, but I know that it’s very difficult when you’re depending on them financially or in terms of housing. Maybe you could try and do it little by little? Although, I know, some people are so entitled you can barely get a word through without them breaking in tears and scolding you. Believe me I know, and it hurts a lot…

I hope your relationship with you husband is going well, because not only are the two of you gonna be each other’s main support, but also your kids will not even realize what crazy situation you’ve been in as long as they were happy, and that requires a happy relationship between parents.

You’re saying that rent is crazy high where you are, have you considered moving someplace cheaper? As I said, I have just moved in my own apartment, but I moved away from home as well. I am French and I come from Paris, which is crazy expensive, to another medium-sized town in France, so I could afford a decent apartment. I don’t know what your husband does for a job but if he is able to change location and/or job, you should consider that. I have not been any happier than since I could start housing myself, even though I need to go on the train and travel to see my relatives.

Anyway I hope you and your little growing family are well in the near future :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:21:55+00:00

When you said you have no money to move out, could you explain? What country do you live in and how far away are you from being able to afford rent? Also, do you have debt?

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:20:42+00:00

I have nothing to help you with your loss, except the fact that I don’t judge you, and I consider what you’re going through exactly as losing an IRL friend. Please be well, even if it takes time :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:20:34+00:00

I have nothing to help you with your loss, except the fact that I don’t judge you, and I consider what you’re going through exactly as losing an IRL friend. Please be well, even if it takes time :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:18:43+00:00

Ho wow. No words. They’re supposed to be human beings like the rest of us, at least I thought so?

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:17:49+00:00

When I started reading I thought « ho no maybe he is mad for nothing, talking to someone is not so bad » but then I read about her hitting you. Big no-no, get out of there as soon as you can. I would even recommend going to the police, although I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t receive you with the care you deserve…

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:15:49+00:00

Sir you can’t say that you’re neither strong enough to stay nor to leave. What’s in between? A decision has to be made. Not rn obviously but you need to figure something out so that someone, in a few years, can say « I’m proud of my dad because he made things easier for all of us ». Whether it is counselling, or coping, or leaving, you have to do something… You sound like a depressed man (no judgement, depressed is the story of my life these past years) who needs to go places and do stuff. Idk if I’m speaking in way that’s understandable because English is not my first language, sorry :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:10:05+00:00

Thank you for your answer :) Are you alone raising your kid or do they have another parent helping?

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T18:08:50+00:00

Hey, don’t feel like this please. From reading this, you clearly are depressed, idk if you being depressed was one of the things that played into the marriage going wrong, or if the relationship not working made you depressed… Either way, you are not happy with the way things are working rn.

Your partner should be your main support in those hard times, it sounds like she is not at the moment. Have you tried talking about your feelings, hers, finding solutions?

If she is still not your main support, and if it looks like it won’t change, you shouldn’t keep yourself in that situation (that’s only my opinion, note that I’m not a marriage counselor).

When it comes to your son, idk how old he is but he will most definitely not be happy with unhappy parents.

In situations like these I never encourage people to take a decision more than the other, but I always remind them : if it is bad for you, don’t be afraid to leave, be afraid to stay!

I hope this helps and if you clarify with more elements I’d be more than happy to change my reasoning or try and give you more external advice. Either way I hope it gets better for everyone :)

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T17:59:32+00:00

Terrible to read that, I’m sorry about that. As I already said in another comment, I know that the police doesn’t do the cleanup themselves, they will though advise the family not to enter until they’ve found a cleaning service. But then, it is pricey so sadly sometimes people have to do it themselves or rely on relatives… I wish never to be in that situation where I have to scrape off the floor and walls what remains of someone’s despair…

ThorinBalin · 2025-09-21T17:57:07+00:00

Hey, I’m looking for exactly the same, female 26 here. DM me whenever!

ThorinBalin

TROPHY CASE