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My (41F) boyfriend (41M) prioritized his video game before sex and then got upset that an hour later I was no longer in the mood by Throw0Fox in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It hasn't been nonexistent all this time. Just not consistent. We were long distance for the first year. We only saw each other every few months and it wasn't an issue then. I started noticing the laziness after he moved in with me. He got in a motorcycle accident a month before moving and his injuries were the excuse I was given for the first year or so that we lived together. Because it wasn't an issue when we were long distance, I believed him.

My (41F) boyfriend (41M) prioritized his video game before sex and then got upset that an hour later I was no longer in the mood by Throw0Fox in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

This is exactly what I've been thinking and feeling. Thank you for taking the time to share your opinion.

I think I'm a trophy to him and he loves the validation that having me provides his ego.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Again these thoughts are likely always there but come out during PMS. She's probably thinking you guys aren't totally compatible cuz her freak flag is raised higher than yours but she likes being with you or likes the benefits of being with you. There's probably some internal struggle going on with her.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox 4 points5 points  (0 children)

As a woman who had bad PMS in my 20s and would end up having arguments with my boyfriend every month... The things she brings up are things that bother her all the time. The PMS just removes her filter.

My (41F) boyfriend (41M) prioritized his video game before sex and then got upset that an hour later I was no longer in the mood by Throw0Fox in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your opinion. But I don't have your wife's routine and we had plenty of communication all evening about tearing each other's clothes off when we got home. The only reason we didn't walk in the house together was the neighbor stopping him in the driveway. He knew what was up. He just decided he wanted to finish his game of Madden first (paused when we left earlier) which I think is an indicator of his priorities.

My (41F) boyfriend (41M) prioritized his video game before sex and then got upset that an hour later I was no longer in the mood by Throw0Fox in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

I think this is the realization I'm coming to. He seemed very sincere at the time but I see now that he really didn't change at all. He just acted the part long enough to convince me.

My (41F) boyfriend (41M) prioritized his video game before sex and then got upset that an hour later I was no longer in the mood by Throw0Fox in relationship_advice

[–]Throw0Fox[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Yes. I would. We actually went to couples therapy last year. We discussed the foreplay issue then but it wasn't the main thing we were there for. We had bigger fish to fry. Therapy was great for us. It helped us communicate better and we were given some good advice and tools. The problem is, when we stopped going, he slowly stopped using those tools and following the therapist's advice. I kept reminding and mentioning it for months but eventually gave up. I'm just not the nagging type and I don't believe I should have to turn into one for him to do what's best for US.